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The thought of my aunt killed my good mood. As long as I was stuck with Aunt Mary, I’d never be more than what I was.
A maid.
Someone to order about and use until there was nothing left. Already, the exhaustion and drudgery got to me most days, crushing the will to do anything outside of my chores.
Gulping in a deep breath to fight away tears, I caught the acrid stench of something burning. Realizing it was my dinner, I shook away any thoughts other than filling my belly and getting some sleep. I’d learned long ago that crying over my situation wouldn’t fix anything.
Chapter Four
Ivy
It was a restless night. I tossed and turned, dreaming of someone following me through the woods. The scent of fresh rain and violets seemed to emanate from him, but his body was shadowed, and all I could see of him was occasional glimpses of wide shoulders, and fur.
The fear that filled me changed to something decidedly indecent when strong arms wrapped around my waist and pulled me against a hard body. When I jolted awake, I clenched my thighs together, shocked at the unaccustomed sensations coursing through me.
My heat was going to come in the fall.
I was certain of it.
And then what?
Dry throat scratching as I tried to swallow, I rolled from my pallet on the floor to get the day started. My lips stretched into a smile as I remembered that it was my birthday.
Lifting the dress I’d found, I fought back the surge of fear that came with it. I’d given up crying over lost causes long ago, and all I could do was hope it looked enough like the one I was wearing that no one would notice.
I took off the tattered dress I’d slept in, putting it aside to wash, just in case. After using a rag and the water I’d brought up the night before to clean up as much as I could, I pulled the dress over my head, marveling at the feel of the smooth fabric against my skin.
The cloth settled around me, hem stopping just below my calf. The waist was a little loose, but otherwise it fit me perfectly, and I couldn’t stop the happiness that filled my chest.
Digging out a bit of torn cloth I had saved, I stuffed it into the toe of the shoes before putting them on, excitement coursing through me as I took a few experimental steps. I would have to get used to the thicker soles, but they would protect my feet better, and I couldn’t wait to be able to go on a walk without worrying about every rock and twig that I might step on. Some of the trees and bushes had thorns that could have sliced right through the slippers.
Leaving the cloak since it was too warm to need it, I headed to the kitchen. With my new shoes, I had no plans to spend my birthday indoors.
Eating a quick breakfast, I packed a simple lunch of bread and cheese with the last bit of good fruit, and a bottle of water before making my way outside. Standing in the garden, I looked toward the mountains with the sun rising beside them. The sunward sides were bright and green, lush with summer growth, while the other side was dark, reminding me there were two sides to life.
I felt like I was stuck in the hazy line between the two. I was in the summer of my life, with the promise of so much more before me, but it wouldn’t take much for me to be lost in the shadows. I knew if my life continued the way it was, that promise would remain unfulfilled, but I didn’t know how to change it.
Sighing, I looked down at the path I stood on. The little pebbles that filled the trail were a light brown and usually kept clean and neat by the groundsman, but with him gone with my aunt and cousins, plants were attempting to retake the space. Right in front of me, a flower grew from the center of the path, petals spread wide to catch the sunlight, and reminding me that beautiful things could still grow from rocky conditions.
Smiling again, I lifted my head and stepped around the flower, leaving it to flourish as long as it could. Humming to myself, I took my time walking across the yard separating me from the trees lining the far side. Butterflies and birds flitted about, and I even spotted a rabbit hopping along in search of its morning meal. Contentment filled my spirit, and I couldn’t help wishing that every day was like this.
I walked through the forest, taking a new path between the trees than I had on other trips. I had no idea how long I wandered, reveling in the comfort of nature. By the time my feet were getting sore and my stomach was starting to grumble, I spotted a clearing ahead of me. The treetops held the heat of the day beneath them, not allowing any breeze to stir the air, so I headed for the sunlight, hoping for a place to rest.
Blinking from the shade along the edge, I was happy with what I found. A meadow opened up in front of me, a stream flowing through the center. Deer were grazing on the far side, a gorgeous buck lifting his head at my small gasp of wonder.
I was afraid to move, not wanting to scare them away, but he must have sensed my presence anyway, signaling his herd back into the forest. Heaving a sigh, I made my way to the side of the stream and took a seat on a little rise beside the water.
The sun warmed my back, but the air blowing over me cooled my skin and pushed the hair away from my face. Pulling out my lunch, I ate as I looked around, the mountains seeming to loom closer than ever before.
I continued to sit after my small lunch was finished, lying back in the grass and staring up at the clouds. I was usually too busy to feel the loneliness and the pain of loss, but that didn’t mean it didn’t linger inside me. I might live in a home with three other people, people who shared my blood, but I was still alone.
An omega wasn’t safe or happy alone. We needed people to care for, and while I was forced to tend to my aunt and cousins, it didn’t fill that space inside me, but it wasn’t as if I could leave. I’d lose any freedom I found the moment I went into heat.
Closing my eyes, I sucked in a deep breath. Just having someone who wanted me, loved me, would make a difference. I could make it through a hundred chores if I had someone to go home to each night, but short of a miracle, I didn’t know how that would ever happen. Even a single friend to talk to would make a world of difference, but there was no one left at my aunt’s house, and I wasn’t allowed to leave.
The sun warmed me, drying the silent tears on my cheeks and soothing my aches like a warm blanket. Body sore and mind tired after a restless night, I let my thoughts drift as I listened to the breeze playing in the branches.
It felt like it had only been a few moments when the boom of thunder startled me. Jerking upright, my wide eyes looked up at the swiftly darkening sky. Wind whipped around me, tangling my hair, and tugging at my dress as I scrambled to my feet.
