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She hangs out the window and watches me march up to the Honda that is second in line.
The music coming from the car is loud, and the boys are yelling at each other while laughing. They toss some money at the driver, who counts it. I stand in the blind spot of the car and eavesdrop. They’re too involved in their own world to know I’m standing outside their car.
“What the heck am I supposed to get for five dollars and fifteen cents?” the driver asks his friends.
“Order a bunch of stuff, get the bags of food, and then drive off. She should be happy she’s getting five bucks,” one of the kids says.
Jesse chimes in. “Yeah, it’s not like they’re losing money. It’s owned by some huge corporation that makes bank off the little man. They won’t even care.”
“Plus, it’s that fat chick working again. Porky probably eats all the food in there anyway. No one will know if some extra goes missing,” the driver adds, and my blood boils at their ignorant bravado.
The car before them finally leaves, and they drive up to the speaker box. I step in front of it.
“Who the heck are you?” the driver asks.
“What can I get you?” the worker inside asks through the speaker.
I ignore her as I lean my hands on the window frame and stare into the car. When Jesse sees me, he practically jumps out of his seat.
“Holy smokes!” he exclaims.
“Hi there!” I state in the sweetest, cheeriest voice, paired with a scrunch of my nose.
Jesse’s friends look panicked.
The one in the driver’s seat drops his vape on the ground, startled and confused by the intruder at the window. “Do you work here?”
“I’m Jesse’s babysitter.”
“Bro, Jesse, your babysitter is hot,” one in the backseat says.
“You have a babysitter? How old are you?” the other one in the back asks.
“She’s not my babysitter,” he explains, annoyed by his friends. “She watches my sister.”
“And you. Today. When I agreed to drop you off at a four-hour driver’s ed class. How’s it going? Looks like you’re learning a ton.”
“Tara, this is … just what it looks like. We decided to, uh, grab some food.”
“Hello? Can I take your order?” the intercom asks.
I lean my elbows on the frame and look at the driver. “You must be the driver’s ed teacher.”
“What the hell is happening right now?” the driver says out loud, picking his vape off the ground and putting it in his mouth.
“Nice vape. Do you know smoking marijuana can make you impotent? You do know what that means, right?”
“That’s not true,” one of the boys states while the other snickers.
“It decreases your testosterone levels and is known to lead to erectile dysfunction and decreased libido.”
“You’re lying,” the kid in the driver’s seat says.
“You sure about that? Only a guy with a small wiener would do something so lame as to shoplift and scam out a drive-through teller. I also heard you guys like to graffiti the neighborhood and race cars until you almost crash them. These are the lowlifes your uncle was warning you about, right, Jesse?” I stand up and motion toward him. “Let’s go.”
Jesse looks at his friends like he doesn’t know if he should stay or go.
The driver shouts at him, “Get out, man! And take your babysitter with you. She’s creepy as fuck.”
