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“I thought you were all for me marrying Jasper. What changed?”
She places her hand on top of mine, twisting her lips. “When your mother decided not to come around. I believe Jasper is a good guy, but I don’t think you should sacrifice your dreams for him or anyone else. You deserve happiness like the rest of us.”
Tears threaten my eyes. Because she has a point. If I give up and my mother comes around, then I’d feel like I’ve given up too soon. “I’m not like you, Lake. You’re ambitious, know what you want. You have big dreams to take over the fashion world, and you’re independent. I’m not like that. You don’t need people like I do.”
She wipes the tears from under my eyes and kisses my forehead. “Poppy, you’re ambitious too, and you’re independent. Yes, I prefer to be by myself and not a social butterfly like you, but I still need people, just in a different way than you do. I can go weeks without speaking to my father.” Ever since I’ve known Lake, her relationship with her father has always been tense. “You lived out on your own without your parents. You stood on your own two feet, when your family turned their backs on you. You’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for.” She exhales. “If you don’t want to marry Jasper, then don’t. But if you do, know what you’re getting yourself into. Marriage is a lot of work, Poppy. Marriage is messy yet blissful at the same time.” She pauses, snatches a Kleenex from the vanity, and dabs the corners of my eyes. “You two are making it about business but it can get complicated.”
Do I want to give up everything I’ve wanted?
When I was about to marry Link, we were going to start a family right away, and I was so desperate to get my dream that I held on to him for too long—longer than I should have. Now, I have a husband, but our future doesn’t include kids and my mother isn’t here.
A knock comes at the door, and I tell the person to come inside. My mother and Sophia stand in the doorway, and my heart leapfrogs in my chest as more tears gather in my eyes. My mother is wearing a long nude-colored gown with her hair in an updo, two diamond rings drop from her earlobes. Without thinking, I jump up from my chair and rush to her, wrapping my arms around her.
She freezes like a statue. My mother has never been a hugger, nor has she been the type to show affection, so I let go of her quickly. She eyes me up and down, taking in my custom-made white wedding gown. Diamonds molded into the seams of my sleeves and cleavage, my train drags behind to the point that Lake is gently pushing it out the door. Jasper spent a pretty penny on this dress and it’s too bad I only have to wear it on this one day.
“I’ve missed you, Mother.”
I can’t keep the tears from flowing, no matter how hard I try.
She doesn’t respond but keeps her eyes on my dress. I should have known she wouldn’t return the affection, and it hurts a little but there isn’t anything I can say or do. She always had this wall up between us.
“Your dress is pretty, but it should have been a little shorter. It’s going to drag all over the place and get ruined,” my mother chastises. “I should have been with you when you picked it out.”
Normally, I would be annoyed by her criticism, but I’m too damn happy to see her.
Sophia embraces me in a hug and kisses my cheek. “You look gorgeous.” Tears gather in the corners of her eyes. “You look like a Disney princess, Poppy.”
I take a step back and assess her teal dress, which is similar to Lake’s but hers is backless and longer.
“You ready, Poppy?”
My gaze goes to Lake, she makes a valid point. I’m giving up my dreams by marrying Jasper, but this is the only way to get in my mother’s good graces. I already let her down before, I won’t do it again. She showed up and now that she’s here, this day can only get better.
I nod and grab her arm, and I hold my head up high as we make it to the door. This is what I need to do. Hopefully, I don’t regret my decision. Now, all I have to do is stay married to Jasper, then my mother will continue to be happy with me. She finally came and it shocked the shit out of me. What made her change her mind? It doesn’t matter. It only matters that she’s here.
Once my mother opens the door, I exhale the breath I didn’t realize I was holding.
We make it to the rooftop that overlooks the sunny city. This is the exact place my mother and father got married, and I chose this place to honor him. He was a light in my life at the time, and I want to feel connected to him in any way I possibly can. I just wish he were here to witness my big day.
Everyone’s eyes are glued to me, and some of the guests suck in their breaths. My mother lifts the veil over my head covering my face, and I glance around to see white roses decorating the chairs and the archway.
The venue is more beautiful than I imagined. There are so many people here, and cameras flash like fireworks in the sky. The classical music picks up as I walk down the aisle and my eyes snag onto Jasper. He looks yummy in his tux and teal tie. Next to him are Trent and Atlas. He chose them as his groomsmen, and on the other side I see Lacey. She wanted to be a bridesmaid, so I told her why not. We’re going to be family.
Everyone rises from their chairs, and people compliment me as I walk past them. Every step I take feels like cinder blocks tied to my feet, weighing me down, and my mind is screaming no, not to do this. I ignore my brain, opting to inhale and exhale silently.
When I stand in front of Jasper, my mother air-kisses my cheeks before sitting in the front row. I stare at Jasper and my heart beats so hard, I can hear it in my ears.
Fear wraps me up like a blanket, and my anxiety climbs in my chest. Jasper smiles. But I know it’s fake. This is a business contract between two people who need something from each other. Two people that don’t love each other. I never thought in a million years that I would enter into a marriage of convenience.
The pastor starts speaking and I tune him out, I tune out everyone staring at us. I tune out the way Jasper is beaming at me.
I can’t go back.
I can’t go back.
I can’t go back.
“Do you take Jasper Barrett as your husband, to have and hold, in sickness and in health, until death do you part?” the pastor asks.
