Page 18 of Whispered Surrender


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“I can’t, Jay. I’ve probably said too much already.”

“I’ll accept that for a short time but I’m going to be looking into it, Sasha. You can count on that. My life and those of my men depend on me having solid information at all times and I can’t protect you from something I’m not aware of. Oh, and before I forget, you know the guy that took you and Brian’s picture while you were in the restaurant? He wasn’t the kind-hearted counselor he was pretending to be. You should be more careful about who you let take your picture, especially with Brian.”

“Okay, so are you going to tell me how you knew what he said to us? Jay, tell me that Brian told you,” Sasha says, narrowing her eyes at me. I sigh, because I knew this was coming.

“We had you under surveillance, to ensure your safety. We needed ears on all conversations.”

“And it’s your fault I needed security,” Sasha snaps, glaring at me.

She’s fucking furious with me, and all I can think about is taming her wild side with the end of my dick. “I’ll accept that, but don’t forget the fact that if you hadn’t been willing to go with Brian the minute he called, you wouldn’t have ever been in that position,” I say, and the minute her eyes lower and mouth trembles I feel a deep sense of remorse. I reach for her hand across the table, but she snatches it away from me. Just the act of her pulling herself away from me makes my chest tighten. This woman affects me on a primal level that I have never once experienced.

“You know nothing, absolutely nothing,” Sasha cries, emphasizing it with a slash of her hand across the air. Her bright blue eyes are lit with fury; it’s all directed at me and hell if I’ve ever seen anything or anyone so fucking hot in my life.

“Tell me then, if it wasn’t like that, explain it to me,” I say calmly, narrowing my eyes at her little body still poised with anger.

“I was going to apologize. Brian broke it off with me a while ago and let’s just say I didn’t take it so well,” Sasha says. I know she’s telling the truth because when Brian became my responsibility and Chase had me take over for Brian’s rogue head of security my first act of business was to review every video feed in the last few weeks to his private lines and computer.

“So what changed your mind, what did you owe him an apology for?” I ask.

She doesn’t stop to think about an answer, just lets it spill like it’s been waiting to come out forever. “For making more of our relationship then there ever was. The reality is that we got together three times. He wasn’t interested in anything more, but I was hoping he would change his mind,” Sasha says, and I swallow hard because I would like to beat the shit out of one of the wealthiest billionaires in the world, one that I am paid to protect.

“Because the sex was that great or because you wanted something more long-term?” I ask, knowing her answer, either way, is bound to piss me off.

She raises her baby blues up at me, and I do my best not to let on that I give a fuck, but dammit she should answer the goddamn question and put me out of my misery.

She doesn’t though, she just shakes her head, and that gorgeous blonde hair falls like a frame around her as her shoulders drop forward and she places her face in her hands. I give her a moment, but that’s all I can fucking stand. I lift her face from her hands and hate the tears that are falling from her eyes.

“Answer the question, Angel,” I say, holding my breath for her response.

12

SASHA

He liftsmy head from my hands, and his dark hazel eyes with the glint of gold seem to bore right through me, waiting for a response. I shake my head and wipe my tears. I don’t know why the hell I am so emotional, but everything that’s happened is taking its toll and hearing my father tell Jay that all he cares about is that I don’t ever contact him again just keeps ringing in my ears. “It wasn’t the sex or the long-term thing.”

His eyes don’t leave mine, and I know he’s still waiting for an explanation. He’s patient, and I wipe more of my tears, wishing I could make them stop, but now that they have started it seems like the floodgates have just opened. “I guess I’m okay to have around for a little bit and then the novelty of having a ballerina in their bed wears off, and then they move on,” I say.

His jaw clenches tightly, and he looks pissed. I cringe. Shit, now he probably thinks I’m trying to guilt him into keeping me around. “Jay, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it to come out like that. I’m not looking for you to make me a long-term commitment.”

His eyes darken and narrow at me, and he leans forward over the table and takes my head in his hands, wiping the remaining tears from my face with his thumbs. “You’ve been handed a shit deal, and you’ve made a great life for yourself regardless, but Angel, your self-esteem sucks. Your father pushing you away did a number on you, but you’re the only one that can rise above this. You need to start believing that you are worthy of anything you want and if someone else isn’t the right match, that’s not because you’re not good enough, it’s just that maybe the chemistry isn’t there. That’s why people go out, date, get to know each other, see if their chemistry is right, you know,” Jay says.

I nod, he’s right, and I appreciate his kindness, and in his own way he is letting me down easy, and I try my hardest to keep my emotions in check.

“So true. We go out, and we test our chemistry, and then we move on. I haven’t done that very well in the past, but you’re right. I can’t let what my father’s done and how he’s treated me continue to impact my life,” I say.

“Exactly. I don’t know your father’s story yet, but you can damn well count on me finding out. Do you know why he wants to keep you a secret, other than the little wife at home knowing that he’s had an affair?” Jay asks.

Clearly Jay is not going to stop asking questions. I know exactly why my father doesn’t want to expose his dirty little secret, but it’s not safe for anyone to know, if I am to stay alive and keep my family safe. He was okay with me reaching out a little bit before, but he made it very clear with Jay and me on the phone. He wants all ties severed, and I know if I don’t adhere to his wishes going forward, the amount of heat that rains down on my family will be deadly.

I shake my head side to side because for some unknown reason I can’t seem to find it in my heart to lie right to the face of the man that sits across from me.

His eyes are glued to my own, and he tracks my head moving side to side, but his jaw clenches as I do. “Angel, you lie to me, and we’re going to have a problem,” Jay says.

“I didn’t lie,” I say.

“You didn’t tell me something that wasn’t true, but with the shake of that little head of yours, you thought you could make me believe that you don’t know without lying, but without telling me the truth either.”

I gulp, because I know he’s right, but I can’t tell him the truth without bringing down a reign of madness. “I wish I could tell you, but it’s not something I can talk about, Jay.”

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