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“Well, this is like a bigger version of your dot. And way more amazing.” I rolled onto my side so he could get a better look. Maybe not a good idea, judging from his thunderous expression. “I mean, justlook at it.”
“How long have you had this,princess?”
Somehow,princesssounded more like a rebuke and less like an endearment.
“Since Solok.” I forced myself to meet his furious stare. “Which makes sense since I was the one casting the magic. That day, my power touched you and Zor, Tavion, and Tristan, but…the power came from me. So my mark is…bigger.”
Raz ran a finger over the raised design, his brow furrowed. “You should have told me.” His low tone wasn’t angry, exactly, more like disappointed. Which was worse somehow.
“I planned to, but then I ended up in a carriage with Tavion all day.” I couldn’t entirely keep the snappish edge from my voice. “I wasn’t going to keep this a secret, if that’s what you’re implying.”
“No.” He blew out a breath. “No, that’s not what I’m saying. This just…” He swallowed, his eyes fixed on the mark. “This scares me, Anaria. Especially after what happened to Solok. Especially after seeing the king and the Oracle.”
I sagged in his arms, glad he’d finally voiced the fears that had been haunting me for days. I had no desire to become a monster, but at least I wasn’t facing this alone.
Neither of us were alone.
No matter what happened, we would be together, and as overwhelming as my fear sometimes became, it was never as bad as it would have been if I was by myself.
“I was planning to tell you,” I said again, laying my head on his chest.
“I know you were. My life…” Raz cleared his throat. “I’ve had a long life, Anaria. Most of it filled with war and fighting. A life that I would never wish on anyone, and that was before our failed revolt and this collar and everything that came after. But I would endure everything all over again, if I’d end up here, like this, with you.”
I sniffled when Raz pressed his lips to the top of my head.
“But you deserve better than this life we’re living. You deserve every good thing I can give you, and I will lay this entire world at your feet, even though you’ve never asked me for a single thing. But you deserve all of it, Anaria. Every star in the sky, every beat of my heart. And I will give it all to you.”
I didn’t know what to say, could hardly speak, so I reached up to lightly touch his cheek, the lightning strike on my side throbbing when the pad of my finger brushed over his dark mark.
He shuddered in response. “The marks connect us, Anaria. In more ways than one.” He grasped my wrist and pressed his lips to my palm.
“I know, Raz. Which means I don’t touch my magic unless I have no other choice. And next time, none of you can be around me if I’m forced to dip into my power. Or we both know how we’ll end up.”
9
ANARIA
The moon was just setting, the stars still bright in the dark sky, and the morning air blossomed with cold, chilled dampness when Raz stomped out the front door.
I was right behind him, preparing for possibly the most humiliating experience of my entire life, when Lucius’s soft plea stopped me.
“Anaria. May I have a moment? I never finished telling you about Tavion last night.”
I tried to keep moving, but my godsdamned feet wouldn’t listen.
Besides, this way, I didn’t have to face the others quite yet, who’d certainly heard every single sound Raz and I—but mostly that fucking defective bed—had made last night.
“I already told you, Lucius, I don’t need to know your son’s secrets.” By the gods, I was blushing so hard my face was on fire. “At the moment, we’re allies out of necessity, but once we figure things out, we’ll go our separate ways.”
I glanced through the open door to the line of saddled horses waiting to take us to Tempeste.
“I have to get going, Lucius. If…Whenwe come back, we can talk more.”
A cowardly move, but we’d already wasted too much time. Zor and the army were already at the border of Solarys and Caladrius, according to Raziel. We only had two days to reach the Wynter Palace, which, by all accounts, was an impossible feat.
“It’s clear you love Tavion. When we return”—Please, don’t let us die on this ridiculous quest.—“you two can fix whatever is broken between you.”
Lucius was a decent male, the kind I’d rarely met in my life, where men tended to be cruel and power hungry and downright evil. I wanted to help him, I did, just…not right now.
