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He smelled like a dish of ’80s potpourri, but the dried come and bits of spit were finally gone, so he considered it a win.
Creeping into the living room, he praised past Ben for being a little lazy with his laundry and leaving a clean basket on the sitting chair, and he grabbed a pair of sweats and some socks. He wasn’t looking forward to venturing out into a frigid morning, but knowing what he was coming home to gave him a feeling he was entirely unfamiliar with.
It wasn’t something he ever felt with Taylor. Not even at the beginning of their relationship.
The profound and almost hysterical need to be with each other hadn’t lasted long with them, and it had never been as powerful or profound as it was with Nova. Ben wasn’t foolish enough to think that feeling would last forever, but somehow, he knew that it would settle into something good.
Into something warm, and safe, and kind.
Someday, Nova would be home. It wouldn’t matter where they were or what they were doing—with Nova, Ben would always be exactly where he was meant to be. He wondered how he’d ever lived with less.
He wondered how, for even a moment, he had considered spending the rest of his life with Taylor, a man who couldn’t give him a fraction of what he wanted.
Or what he deserved.
Grabbing his keys, he jumped in the car and shivered until the heater kicked on a few miles down the road. It wasn’t even seven yet, so the streets were mostly empty, and he pulled into his favorite little market that had a bakery and barista bar in the front. Nova had mentioned cooking, so Ben perused the aisles for a bit, grabbing the essentials he’d been neglecting just like he did at the end of every semester.
He threw ingredients for omelets and then some for pancakes into the cart, then grabbed some of the expensive, hand-pressed juice that cost more than he’d spent on gas the last time he filled up. But Nova was worth it.
He grabbed coffee and tea since he was mostly out and some overly sweet creamer because Nova seemed like the kind of guy who liked coffee that way. It killed him a little that he didn’t know, but it soothed him to think that Nova was going to give him a chance to learn all the small things that made him who he was.
Ben wanted to know his favorite color and his favorite season. He wanted to know his best memories from his childhood and his worst. He wanted to see Nova angry and learn all the ways to soothe his bad moods and make moments easier when he was sad or scared.
He wanted to make a life with him, and that should send him running in the other direction because it was so soon.
But God, it felt so right.
As he stood in front of a table full of pastries, he thought about how rumpled and tired and soft Nova had looked that morning, and he didn’t realize he was smiling until an unwanted, familiar voice said, “I haven’t seen that look on you in a while.”
Ben’s entire body froze. It was bad enough running into Chris, but that was damn near unavoidable since they were both on campus together. But Taylor lived on the other side of town. There was no reason for him to be there now.
He took a fortifying breath, then turned away from a massive box of cinnamon rolls and hoped his expression was as blank and dead as he wanted it to be.
“Now, that’s the Benny I remember.”
He sighed. “Don’t call me that. I hated it when we were together, and I hate it even more now.”
Taylor blinked at him. “Are you seriously going to be like this?”
“Like what?”
“Unhappy to see me? For the rest of my life, Benny—Ben?” he corrected.
Ben scoffed and rolled his eyes. “You think I should be jumping for joy? You wasted my time, you took away my TA—”
“You didn’t have to fire Chris,” Taylor interjected.
Ben laughed, the sound sharp and angry but not as pained as it once might have. “If I fucked him and left you, would you have wanted to see him every day?”
“Well, I’m in love with him, so I think I’m a little biased,” Taylor said. By his tone, Ben knew the words were meant to hurt, and he braced himself for it, but the pain never came. All he felt was a vague sort of pity that Taylor was here, trying to get a rise out of him.
“I guess you are. Anyway, I have to get back home, but…”
“That’s definitely not shopping for one,” Taylor said, staring into his cart.
Ben lifted his brows. “What is your point, Taylor? Seriously, why are you here right now? It was bad enough Chris decided to get in my business, but you—”
“What did Chris do?” Taylor asked, his tone suddenly intense.
