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Once she was undressed, I helped her into the tub, making sure she was comfortable before handing her the glass of wine. She settled into the warm water with a long sigh, sipping her wine while I took a seat on the edge of the tub.
“Mariah,” I said, choosing my words carefully. “I know I’ve said it already, but I want to apologize for how I acted earlier. I’ll apologize for the rest of my life if I have to. My dragon's temperament can sometimes get the better of me, especially when it comes to you. I know it’s not an excuse, and I’m not pretending my behavior was acceptable. I just want you to know how much I regret every second of what happened today.”
Her eyes met mine, searching, her lips pursed as she shook her head. “I understand, Evan. Really I do. It's just hard for me. I’m not a dragon. I’ve never experienced this world before.”
“I know.” I reached out to cup her cheek, taking the risk that she might still reject me. But I meant what I said. I’d do whatever it took to make things right. My body nearly slumped with relief when she didn’t push me away.
“Abi told me what she said to you earlier,” I said tentatively. “I’m sorry if her words hurt you. She didn't mean any harm, she was just explaining our world to you. She wants you with me just as much as I do.”
Mariah's eyes drifted from mine, and she stared at the bubbles deep in thought. Her honey blonde hair was pulled up in a bun, tendrils falling and framing her beautiful face. She was the most gorgeous woman I’d ever laid eyes on. Fate was gracious enough to give me such an amazing woman, and I prayed I hadn’t gone and truly fucked things up this time. I tucked a tendril behind her ear, then pulled my hand back, putting the ball in her court.
We sat there for a few minutes, Mariah sipping her wine thoughtfully. She didn’t ask me to leave, which I took as a good sign.
“Can I ask you something?” she finally said, her gaze coming back to mine.
“Of course.” I brushed a stray strand of hair from her forehead.
“Am I…” She stopped, took a shaky breath, then tried again. “Do I truly have a place in your world, Evan? This isn’t the time to be gentle. We can’t ignore that I’m not like the rest of you. I’m human. An outsider looking in. This isn’t my world. I’m not familiar with any of this, and while I’m trying my best to figure it out sometimes…I just don’t know what to think.”
Mariah’s words nearly knocked me sideways. Her shoulders curled in, and she stared at the bathwater. I never wanted her to feel like an outsider, would never make her feel that way intentionally. She was human, but that didn’t mean anything to me.
“You belong with me.” I felt the truth of those words deep in my soul. “Whether that’s here, in New York, across the globe.” I took a deep breath. She was my mate. I couldn’t stand the idea of her looking in from the outside. “What happened today…please don’t make that mean anything about us. It wasn't about you, Mariah. You did nothing wrong. This was entirely about me and my inability to control my dragon at times. I was so jealous seeing you touch another man that I lost control entirely. That’s hard for me to admit, but I’m trying my best. I swear it won’t be this way once I claim you, but—”
“But what?” She sat up, placing her wine on the edge of the tub and staring at me. “You keep saying these things, then something like this happens. Jax isn’t a threat to you.”
Silence fell. She’d never come out and said it like that before. Her heart beat steadily in the quiet stretching out between us, a testament to the truth of her words—at least what she believed. We hadn’t fully acknowledged how my jealousy was particularly strong when it came to Jax. I always brushed it off as my dragon’s possessiveness and desire to claim our mate, but Jax especially got me all riled up, overprotective, and irrational. Maybe part of it was due to my initial lack of trust, thinking he could be the enemy, but just thinking of him now had me gritting my teeth.
Mariah stared at me as she shook her head. “Seriously? You should know this. I love you, Evan. I’m here because of you.”
“I know,” I said with a grimace. “I do. But that doesn’t mean I can trust him.”
She sighed, and I knew it was time to let that one go.
“My point is, if none of this was going on, I already would’ve claimed you. This isn’t how I want it to be, Mariah. The timing is terrible. I told you it would be as soon as possible, and I meant it.”
“In the meantime, you can’t focus on the problem at hand because of it.” She grabbed her wine again and took a long drink, then settled back under the bubbles.
I thought I’d made this clear, but maybe she didn’t really understand what this meant to me. “A claiming is so much more than just a way to make things official. It’s a lot like a human proposal. You’re deciding on this one person to bind yourself to, to be your partner through life. Thought needs to be put into it. It has to be special. I want ours to mean something. I never thought I’d find someone like you. And the fact that you gave me a chance, then stuck it out when things got messy…you’re incredible, Mariah.
“I want our claiming to be something we treasure forever. It shouldn’t be minimized by all the chaos going on around us right now.” I leaned closer, staring into her eyes, hoping she hadn’t shut me out and our connection was still strong enough for her to feel my sincerity. “I want it to be perfect because you’re perfect, and you deserve nothing but the best.”
Mariah blinked and took a big breath. “I had no idea it meant so much to you. I guess I just feel like if it could help you calm down…” She shrugged. “It means a lot to me that you want to make it special for us.”
She rested her head back on the edge of the bathtub and closed her eyes, a sigh escaping her lips. All I wanted was to close the gap and kiss her, to make her forget everything else except us and how we belonged together.
Instead, I pulled back, wanting to give her as much time as she needed. We fell into silence again, and after a while I said, “I spent all afternoon thinking about this, figuring out what to say, how to be sure it wouldn’t happen again. I shifted, talked with my dragon, and I swear to you, he understands the seriousness of the situation, too. There won't be any more acts of jealousy. I can’t apologize enough for what happened, but I can vow to you now that it will never happen again.”
Her eyes opened, flashing with the strength and independence that’d made me fall in love with her. She leveled me with a fierce stare. “It better not. I love you, Evan, more than I ever thought I could love another, but I won’t stand for violence against those we protect. I’ll be damned if I let your excuses about being a temperamental dragon be the reason for getting rough with me or anyone else.”
“Understood and agreed. You have my word, Mariah. Never again.” I meant it with my entire being.
Her eyes were still glued to mine. “That’s right.”
I smirked. “Just so you know, my dragon is quivering with fear.”
She gasped. “Are you making fun of me?”
“Not at all. I just like seeing that fierce side of you come out. I might be the dragon, but you’re the fiery one.”
