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“But...I think I spent close to a thousand dollars today,” I whispered.
Cole shook his head. “Marley, baby, I don’t mean to make you feel weird, but I’m just wondering where this stress is coming from. I’ve never gotten upset with you for spending, and I certainly wouldn’t after I asked you to do it for me as a favor.”
I opened my mouth, then closed it again, realizing that was true. Hell, I wasn’t sure why I was so worried and stressed out, either. “I don’t know,” I finally said.
Cole cupped my face with his hand, brushing his thumb over my cheekbone. “Tell you what, you think about it for a while. I’ll get these groceries put away, and you can get your little treasures situated in the house. Noah is staying with my parents tonight and tomorrow to keep him out of the way for Travis and Lana, so when we’re all done, you can show me our new house and we can talk about what you figured out.”
I forced myself to take in a deep, slow breath before nodding. “That sounds good.” I managed a small smile as relief coursed through me. Cole wasn’t angry. “If you need any help putting things away, let me know, okay?”
“I appreciate it,” he said. He kissed me lightly on the forehead before disappearing inside.
I took a moment to gather my courage, reminding myself of Lana’s advice earlier. Taking a deep breath, I carried my purchases into the house and began unpacking everything. I put the new bed linens in the bedrooms, folded the new towels, and put out our new toothbrush holders. After folding my new clothes, I put them away in the new dresser Cole had gotten for our bedroom. Now, instead of just having a couple of drawers for my things, I had an entire half of the wardrobe, which felt strangely validating. He still wanted me to take up space in this home. A home that was more and more starting to feel like it was mine as much as his and Noah’s.
I put away the new cookware last. Cole had really gone all out with our new kitchen and living room, with their updated, quiet-close drawers and cabinets, lazy Susans, pull-out racks for implements, and so on. The color scheme remained largely the same, but everything was more polished.
When I was done, I looked over at Cole. He was staring thoughtfully out the window, watching the tide come in as the sky turned a pretty shade of marigold and magenta with the coming evening.
“Penny for your thoughts?” I asked.
He turned to me and smiled, stretching his arm toward me. I moved toward him, and he enveloped me in an easy embrace. “I missed this view more than I realized,” he said, swaying me softly. “It feels nice to be home finally.”
I nodded. “Yeah, it’s beautiful out here. It’s so nice to be near the shoreline again. I missed the sounds of the ocean,” I admitted. “Far preferable to the sound of cars late at night or our neighbors at the condo.”
“Yeah, it’s almost eerily quiet now,” he said. “I was missing you before you came back home.”
I smiled and snuggled into him. I knew we needed to address the elephant in the room, to talk about the fight, but I was even more loath to do it now that Cole was at ease for the first time in what felt like forever.
“So, did you think about it? That anxiety?” he asked.
Damn. Spoke too soon.
“I did, yeah,” I said. “But I don’t want to ruin the good mood. We can talk about it later.”
“I think we’ve swept enough under the rug for now, don’t you?” His tone was soft and his expression was kind, but guilt coiled like a snake in my stomach. “Tell me what’s on your mind, baby. It’s a rare opportunity that we get to focus on us for a while.”
I pressed my lips together and fussed with a button on his shirt. “I don’t want you to get mad at me again,” I said quietly. “I think that’s why I keep avoiding talking to you about everything, and why I got weird when I came home with all that stuff.”
Cole frowned as he considered that. “Are you saying that you’re scared of disappointing me financially after what happened before?”
I sighed and shrugged helplessly. “Partially, yes. But also, I think there’s part of me that maybe expects you to resent me or grow tired of supporting me, especially given everything else that’s going on right now. Between Travis’s transformation, Noah, all the work you’ve been taking on, and the...the whole me becoming a shifter thing.”
Cole’s voice was gentle when he replied, “Marley, sweetheart, remember who you are talking to. You know that I worship the ground you walk on. A thousand bucks? Babe, that’s a drop in the bucket right now compared to everything we had to do to the house. Hell, we even have some money left from the insurance settlement. It’s no big deal.”
“Okay,” I said with a sigh, feeling a little better after hearing that there was money left. I fussed a little more with his button. “Cole,” I began softly, “I’m sorry about the fight we had.”
His face softened. “I’m sorry, too,” he replied sincerely. “I never want to fight with you, Marley. And I’m sorry for shouting and being so stubborn. I’m sorry for scaring you and reminding you of Wyatt. I hate that I got so upset. But when you gave me that ultimatum, I was so terrified. It felt like I would lose you either way.”
“It’s okay,” I said, wrapping my arms tight around him. “I understand now why you reacted the way you did. It’s because you care about me.”
“And I hope you believe me when I say that I will never, ever try to control you or tell you what to do, just like I hope you believe me when I say that I am fully committed to helping you feel like you belong among all of us in the pack. Part of why I’m so against the idea is because I don’t want you feeling like it’s something you have to do to belong.”
“That is part of the reason, but you know it’s not the only one, Cole. I mean, I’ve been trying to talk to you about all the reasons, but you’re so quick to change the subject when I bring it up that it’s been kind of hard to get a word in.”
Cole grimaced. “Yeah,” he acknowledged. “I know I’ve been a bit of an ass, to be sure. But you already know why I’m against it.”
“I do,” I said. “But Cole, I might decide to do this, and I need to know that you’re going to be with me every step of the way, just like you’ve been with Travis so far. If I can’t rely on my mate to support me in the things that are important to me, I’ll have to start asking what I’m doing here, you know?”
He nodded, looking appropriately contrite, his brows low and his lips dipped down at the corners. “That’s fair. You deserve my support. Even if it’s something I disagree with, I will still support you. Because it’s your decision, and I love you. I just ask that you try to understand where I’m coming from, too, babe.”
