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“I do,” I said. “And I promise I’ll try to communicate better, too. We’re a team, Cole, remember?”
He reached down and held my hand. “Yes, baby. We’re a team,” he agreed. “So...does that mean you’ve made your choice then? About transitioning?”
“No,” I admitted. “Not yet. I still have a lot to think about before I make that leap. But it’ll be a lot easier to decide what I really want if I know I can trust you to support it.”
All the tension in Cole’s body seemed to dissipate at that, and I tried not to let that reaction bother me as I leaned into him. What mattered here was that he was willing to try, not that he did things perfectly right from the beginning. And I needed to do my best to meet him halfway, too. If he was going to be working on being supportive, I needed to work on being more resilient when he was uncertain. I needed to work on having enough confidence to make up for the shortcomings when it came to his support.
“I’ve really been missing you lately,” I said softly.
“I’ve missed you, too,” he said. “This stalemate has been really fucking brutal for me. I’ve had to do everything I could to stay busy so I didn’t drive myself crazy with it.”
“Me too,” I said with a little laugh.
Cole reached out, brushing his knuckles over my cheek. “I love you,” he said, his eyes filled with warmth. “And I’ll always support you, Marley. Even if you’re scaring the shit out of me. You might just need to give me some time to adjust.”
His words touched my heart, and I felt a swell of appreciation for him. In that moment, the love we had for each other overshadowed our differences once again, something I’d been missing terribly in our interactions. It felt like a return to normal, and I was so grateful for it. Cole was my best friend, and being at odds with him made me feel all out of sorts in the worst ways.
“So,” I said, “tell me what you’ve been up to while you’ve been avoiding me.”
“Oh, with pleasure,” he replied with a smile. “But let’s crack open some champagne to celebrate being back home, shall we?”
I laughed and nodded. “I could use a little buzz, anyway. I’m kind of nervous about tomorrow.”
Cole told me about everything he’d been up to—finding the abandoned hotel project up by the lake, running into Ms. Paulson while he was there, applying for the federal grant to start building the infrastructure for our pack. When we were fully caught up and about halfway done with our glasses of bubbly, I pulled my knees onto the new couch and propped my head on my hand.
“So, we’re going to move out of town?” I asked. “I thought you wanted to keep things central to New Middle Bluff.”
“I do,” he said. “But the only available places that are big enough are too much of a mess to buy up and start fixing. Some of them are fucking health hazards, even.” He rubbed his chin the way he always did when he was deep in thought. “It’s a commutable distance. We could drive back and forth every day, but I’ve gotten more and more stressed out about how things are becoming here in New Middle Bluff. This is supposed to be one of the most shifter-friendly cities in the United States. If we can’t trust our sense of safety here, maybe it is better that we have a compound like my grandfather’s. At least eventually.”
“Honestly, I felt safer there than I do here—even as a human,” I confessed. “It may be better.”
“I just hate that it feels like I’m giving up,” he said quietly. “I grew up here, Marley.”
“I know, but we can always come back. We don’t have to sell your property or anything. It may be a good opportunity for you to start making some passive income—through renting and stuff.”
“My little businesswoman,” he teased, brushing some hair away from my face. “My little sunbeam full of great ideas.”
Laughing, I took a sip of my champagne. “Now you’re just flattering me.”
“Am not,” he insisted. “I mean it. You always come up with clever ideas. That’s a big part of why I want you working with me on putting the pack together.”
“In that case, I think we should do it.”
“Do what?”
“I think we should get the unfinished hotel. You said yourself that the bones are good, the land is pretty, and we’d have plenty of room to house those seeking refuge. The lake will lend itself well to training and exercise and helping shifters blow off steam, and its remote nature will make it feel more healing and comfortable for people who are recovering from abusive packs.” I paused for a moment. “Plus, you know, it will be something we can truly do together. I won’t feel so much like a leech on your hospitality if I can help with things.”
His brow creased in dismay. “You helped with the condo.”
“And I loved it a lot, but I can tell you’re not as comfortable there,” I said. “I can tell you missed this house. Maybe the lake house will feel more comfortable for all of us and feel like a home we’re making together.”
He smiled and placed his hand on my bent leg, tugging me closer to him. “Is that what you’d like? To feel like we’re building a home together?”
I smiled, feeling my face start to warm from the champagne and the slight flustered feeling that came along any time he manhandled me, even with such a brief and innocuous touch. “Yeah,” I said. “I want...I mean, this probably sounds stupid, but I really like feeling like...like we’re married. Like I’m your wife.”
He smiled and cupped my face in his hand again. “I love feeling like you’re my wife,” he said, his voice like honey. “I love coming home to you every day, and I love how you take care of Noah, and I love how much you’ve started to feel like my family.”
I smiled and closed the distance between us to kiss him. It was a slow, lingering kiss that telegraphed a blissful night together. I had missed entangling my body with his. I’d missed feeling him inside me.
