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"I was just thinking how incredible you look in those."
"You think?" she says. "It's just PJs."
"I don't think there's anythingjustwhen it comes to you, Miracle. So tell me, are we going to make coffee and sit by the fire, or are we going to go back to bed for a little bit?"
She looks down at the ring in her finger. "I mean, if we're already engaged, I don't think there's anything wrong with us sleeping together. Do you?" Her eyebrows lift and there's a smile on her face that is so teasing, so delightful, I feel like the luckiest man in the world. As my cock grows hard, I take her hand in mine, dragging her to my bedroom.
8
MIRACLE
When I told my sisters and Dad that I was going to be gone on Christmas, they were surprised but also excited for me. They laughed, incredulous that I was actually going to go over to Silas' house. I didn't tell them that Silas was going to be alone at his parents’ house on Christmas.
I figure I'm an adult, and some things are okay to keep to myself. That's why when I woke up extra early, putting on my cutest Christmas pajamas and walking down the quiet street toward his parents' home, I had a buoyancy I haven't had in ages. My heart was full in a way I have rarely experienced. I felt free. I felt alive. I felt like I was walking toward the direction of my future, and I know that's crazy… or at least it was crazy… but now I'm standing here in Silas' house with his grandmother Holly's engagement ring on my finger and a look in his eyes that says he's hungry. Like he is as starved as I am.
My whole body lights up as he takes my hand and leads me to his bedroom for our Christmas morning nap. It's not even dawn, yet he's pulling back the covers of his large bed in a bedroom that is filled with trinkets from his childhood. I smile as I look over the corkboard above his old desk. There's pictures of him playing baseball and soccer, a ribbon from a race he'd won. The rest of his room is pretty bare, which makes sense considering he left home right after he graduated, same as me.
"Your bedroom's so neat and tidy," I say.
He shrugs. "My mom made sure of that. I think she misses having me here a lot actually."
"Do you miss being here?" I ask him. He takes my hand and leads me to his bed. We both slide in under the flannel covers. It's warm and cozy and smells like laundry detergent in the best possible way.
"I miss the comforts of home sometimes, but I have liked being out at sea. I read a lot of books. I exercised a lot. I have seen places I would've never seen otherwise."
"Do you think you'll make a whole life of being a sailor?" I ask him.
"I don't know. It depends."
"On what?" I ask. We turn toward each other in his bed, as if we've done it hundreds of times even though this is the only time in my entire life I've been in bed with a man. I swallow. "What does it depend on, Silas?"
"On what comes next. I don't want to be a sailor at the cost of having a family."
I smile. "You mean our kids?"
He laughs and reaches for my hand, playing with the diamond that's wrapped around my finger.
"I can't believe I can't get this off," I say. "I'm sure if I use some butter or warm water or something…"
"I don't want it to come off," he says. "Look how cute it looks on you. It looks like a Christmas ornament. You're all decked out for the holiday."
I close my eyes. "Silas, I don't know if my heart can handle this level of make-believe."
“Then don't make it make-believe. Just act as if..."
"As if what?" I ask.
"As if this is what we're doing. We're together. We're going to get married. On Christmas morning, we're inourbed." He smiles. "And we're planningourlife together,ourfuture."
"Isn't that dangerous?" I ask. "All that talk of a fairytale life?"
"What if it's simply our happily ever after?"
"You hardly even know me."
"You're right," he says. He runs his hand over my hair, and a shiver runs through my body at his gentle touch. I want him to stroke me other places too. Everywhere. "I want to know everything about you, Miracle. I always thought you were going to be in a convent for life. When my dad told me last night that you were back in town"—he shakes his head—"I was shocked, but also not."
"What do you mean not?"
