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Troy pulls me to him, and I lean into his long muscular length. And for the moment, I feel safe, protected.
Heat rolls off him, and my body greedily absorbs it. He kisses my temple. “You’re staying at my house tonight, Jess. And wewillbe calling the cops.”
I pull away and try to keep the panic from my expression. “What for? Other than the tape on the back door, there are no signs of a break-in. The police won’t believe me. And maybe I’m wrong.”
A long breath blows over Troy’s lips, and I can tell he’s contemplating the truth to my words. A crease pinches between his eyes. “You’re right. They probably won’t take it seriously without more substantial proof.” He exchanges a quick glance with Lucas.
My gaze makes contact with Kellan’s, and everything I’m thinking is mirrored on his face. He doesn’t trust cops any more than I do, and he partly understands what I’m afraid of, what I refuse to tell Troy.
The SDPD didn’t believe me when I tried to escape my abusive husband. They didn’t believe me when I insisted I didn’t kill him. They didn’t believe me when I told them I didn’t know how the drugs got into my system.Lies. Lies. Lies.That was all they thought I was capable of.
Why should I believe Maple Ridge’s police department is any different?
* * *
After dinner,everyone leaves except for Troy. “I’d feel better if you stayed at my house,” he tells me, drying the last of the plates I just washed.
“I want to stay here.” I need to stay here for reasons he can’t understand. Not without me explaining why my home is important to me. I press my lips briefly to his. “But if it makes you feel better, you can stay here. With me.”
He puts the plate on the counter and cups the back of my head with his hand. “Are you talking about me staying on the couch?” His mouth brushes mine. I part my lips, giving him access. His tongue sweeps inside my mouth, setting off a four-alarm fire deep in my belly.
I moan against his lips. “I was thinking more like my bed.”
Troy pulls back, his gaze locked on mine. “What are you saying, Jess? I need you to spell it out for me.” A million questions shine in his eyes. Questions about what has happened to me. Questions about whether I’m ready to take things further between us. Questions about if we’re on the same page.
“I want you inside me, Troy. Does that clarify things?”
He nods slowly and swallows, his Adam’s apple jerking up and floating down. “Definitely.”
His mouth is on mine again, and all his questions and doubts and my insecurities are banished for the moment.
Troy’s hands trace over my body, exploring my shoulders, arms, ribs, breasts. His touch is so reverent, so tender, I tear up. I blink away the tears before their meaning is misunderstood, before he thinks we’re moving too quickly. We’re not. I’m ready.
His mouth moves along my jaw and down my neck. He gently nips my skin with his teeth. Need, desire, and want ignite deep inside me, and wetness dampens my panties.
I moan, my fingers exploring the strong muscles of his back.
“Woof. Woof.”
We glance down at Bailey and Butterscotch, who are gazing expectantly up at us.
“I should probably take Bailey out first and put her in her crate,” I tell Troy, even though she’s used to sleeping with me and not in the crate.
We take the two dogs outside. Once Bailey is in her crate and Butterscotch has settled himself in the living room, Troy takes my hand and leads me upstairs.
He flicks the bedroom light on. The sudden brightness chases away the soft shadows created in the dim twilight.
My chest tightens, and I gulp air into my lungs. My husband kept the light on when we had sex so he could see the fear on my face. See the damage he inflicted on my body. Those things…they made him more excited, harder, more dangerous.
“I need to do this in the dark.” I don’t fear Troy. I know he’ll never hurt me. But lights mean he will see the road map of abuse on my body, and that includes the pink scar on my back where I was stabbed.
“I want to see you, Jess.” Troy’s tone is soft, almost cajoling. “When I make you come, I want to see your beautiful expression.” His mouth caresses my lips. “I want to watch you come apart in my arms.”
I shake my head with a jerk. “No. No, this has to be on my terms.” My throat tightens just thinking about his reaction if he saw my body. Kellan’s reaction was bad enough. It’ll be so much harder for Troy.
And that will lead to questions. Questions I want to avoid.
“Okay,” he says after a moment’s hesitation and flicks off the light.
