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Is that a typo? What’s a geode?Jan responded.
Ellen chuckled. She’d known her mother would be unlikely to have thought of something this unique. She didn’t have the money to buy anything right now, anyway. And who did Jan know in Coyote Canyon she could ask to deliver a gift?
Never mind, she wrote.
What’s going on?her mother asked.
That was the thing. Ellen didn’t know.Nothing. Forget I asked, she wrote back. But finding such a beautiful item on her front porch after a hard day was certainly a pleasant surprise.
Her eyes returned to it again and again while she watched TV. She even carried it into the bedroom with her when she went to bed.
Six
Jordan called on Thursday. After they talked and laughed for an hour, he said he could drive down for a couple of days, and Ellen had agreed. She wasn’t sure why, except that having a visitor would help get her mind off her father and Hendrix, who seemed to be more of a focal point lately. For some strange reason, she couldn’t quit reliving the moment Hendrix had arrived at her door to apologize for trying to steal Ben. She couldn’t figure out why he would humble himself enough to do that.
It seemed too soon to meet Jordan in person—and yet she knew he’d suspect her of stalling if she put him off. She’d been called “emotionally inaccessible” by enough men that she didn’t want it to happen again.
At least he was planning to get a motel room. That would help. But he didn’t know anyone else in town. She’d feel a great deal of pressure to entertain him, regardless.
What had she been thinking, putting herself out there on an online dating platform? Doing that was what had started the whole thing.
The answer, however, was obvious. She was lonely. Since moving to town, she’d put everything she had into her work and was beginning to wonder if there wasn’t more to life. Besides, she’d watched Talulah and Brant over the past year, seen how happy they were together. She craved something similar.
But she’d always craved more love than she could find, so she knew better than to allow that need—that vulnerability—to get the best of her. True intimacy seemed to be reserved for other people. If her own father couldn’t love her enough to stay, or even make her a part of his life after he left, there had to be something inherently wrong with her. Although her mother insisted it washisproblem and not hers, by all accounts he had a good relationship with Leo and Hendrix. That made her feel like ithadto be her, that things would’ve gone differently if she wasn’t so impossible to love.
As she sat in her truck eating the salad she’d picked up for lunch, she grumbled, “I don’t need anyone.” Sometimes she had to remind herself of that. But Ben, who was striding purposefully toward her even though she’d already taken his food to the rig, proved an immediate contradiction. She had to have a helper at work, or she couldn’t drill. And despite the raise, he didn’t seem any more committed to what they had to get done in the next few months, which came as a letdown. She felt she deserved more resolve on his part—more of a willingness to help push the business farther and faster.
Instead, as soon as he’d arrived this morning, he’d told her he needed to take Friday, Saturday and Sunday off next week so he could attend a wedding with his girlfriend in Salt Lake City.
Surely, whoever was getting married had sent out the invitations long before now. Why hadn’t he given her more notice so she could’ve planned ahead?
Now she had to call clients and put them off, which never went over very well...
As he drew closer, she rolled down the window. “Something wrong?”
“Did you get extra dressing?”
She’d already given him two of the four packets that’d come with their food, but she wasn’t willing to hear him complain about not being able to finish his salad, so she handed himherextra packet just to buy a few more minutes of peace before she had to return to the rig herself.
“Thanks,” he said and went back to finish his salad.
“Hallelujah,” she muttered as she watched him go. That she wasn’t feeling all that great toward him made the long hours they spent together far less enjoyable. Having him disrupt next week’s schedule so cavalierly certainly didn’t help.
But at least Ben’s trip to Salt Lake would coincide with Jordan’s visit, so she wouldn’t have to juggle having a visitor with trying to work each day. Jordan planned to arrive Friday night, the same day Ben would get up early and drive to Utah, so she could spend a few hours getting caught up on paperwork and still have plenty of time to clean her place and grab groceries in case she decided to have Jordan over or cook. Then she’d have Saturday and most of Sunday with him—until he drove home to Libby—and she could get back to drilling on Monday.
A text came in from her mother:Thanks for helping with my rent, honey.
Ellen took another bite of her salad, then frowned at the words. She seemed to be growing more disgruntled with everyone in her life. Everyone except Talulah. Talulah hadn’t done anything wrong.
No problem, she wrote back. Her mother would only press her if she didn’t respond and, again, she just wanted a few more minutes of peace.
She’d just finished her salad and was stuffing the container back into the sack when another text came in, this one from Talulah.Did you ever figure out who gave you that geode?
She hadn’t. She’d put it back on her coffee table, where she was reminded of the mystery every time she saw it. But she’d asked everyone she knew, and no one seemed to have any clue where it’d come from or why it’d been left onherdoorstep.
“That’s a weird gift,” Ben had said when she’d mentioned it to him.
She supposed he was right. It probably wasn’t something most people thought to look for. But she liked it. For her, it was symbolic of the beauty that could be found inside a rather plain or unattractive exterior. Contrasts like that had always appealed to her. “I guess I’m a weird girl,” she’d told him with a shrug.
