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A soft rumble vibrates in his chest, his lips curling. “I’m fine. I’ll sleep tonight.”
Because he’s in bed with me?
Even after what happened in the shower back at home, I still shared his bed, more for me than him if I’m being truthful.
I’m not sure when it happened, when the need flipped. Maybe it didn’t at all if the red diluting the whites of Lance’s eyes tell a story, but at some point, the footsteps padding on the floorboards to his room became heavier, desperate, seeking out the contentment his company brings me. Something we both seem to crave from one another.
I don’t want to need anyone. To rely on a single person to survive.
“I’m sorry,” I tell him. “I was worried with the rooms being so much closer here… it’s so new for Ave even having you in her life without seeing us…”
“Shh.” His lips brush mine. “I went seven years without you. The fact I’m even here on this island, in this lodge with you…” He kisses my jaw, dipping for my neck again. “Fuck, I could do this all fucking day, though.”
I purse my lips, tilting my head back to give him better access. “Of course you could. Physical touch is your kryptonite.”
The scruff of his jaw scratches my throat as his mouth stretches into a smile. “Scarlet, Scarlet, Scarlet,” he chides. “You’re supposed to be smart.”
I chuckle, closing my eyes as his hands and lips explore further. He nuzzles my chest, biting before licking the underside of my breast. Something in me soars when he leans back and looks at my breasts, almost boyish.
I can’t help but feel robbed of the years we lost. The majority of his thirties stripped away not just from him but me, too.
“I slept on these that night in the shower. I’ve missed them.”
He stares at them, hands palming their heaviness while his fingers tease across my nipples.
I look down at him, at his hands, my nipples hard. “I think they missed you, too.”
When his eyes lift, he grins, and for a second, I let go of the lost time. The what wasn’t, what was, and what could’ve been. Those seven years were the best and worst of my life.
Instead, I take his smile, and I pretend there’s not missing parts, not a smile I missed, or a tear I couldn’t wipe away.
“If you promised me you wouldn’t remember tomorrow, I might think about telling you I love you tonight.”
He smiles smugly, his tongue poking out between his teeth. “I ain’t promising you shit, Baby Lowell.”
“I’m awful, aren’t I?”
He rolls us, putting me on top and straddling his waist. I lean over him, my hair creating a veil around us. “No. Not even a little bit.” He looks at me as if he knows I’m close, as if he doesn’t care at all that I’m a coward. He has his line cast and can feel the tug on the other end. The fight of his life is almost in touching distance—because I am close. “You’re perfect.You’remy kryptonite.”
And I don’t deserve you.
With tears forming in my eyes, I bend and take his full lips.
Lance takes my hips and pushes me down his body, far enough back I line up with his erection. “Ride me while I appreciate your tits, Scarlet.”
TWENTY-SEVEN
Scarlet
Whenever I’m at home and I reminisce about being here at the lodges, I always think of these moments. It’s not the sun blazing down on the lounger as sweat sticks to my warmed skin, or the evenings spent around the fire pit or the dinner table. I love all of those things. But when I think back, I think about this.
The sun’s slowly rising over the cliff top, the view uninterrupted thanks to the open doors and glass balcony panels.
It’s a promise to me.
I wait all night in the darkness for the sun to come up and bring back the light. Everything is a little less heavy, clearer in the sun’s presence.
Lance must have opened the curtains and doors. No matter how much time has passed, he still remembers all the little things. And I know by the heat still warming the mattress at my back that he left me only a short while ago, knowing Ave could walk in here at any minute and find us together.
