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“Do you get these dreams often?” I ask, shifting down off my knees to sitting, one foot dangling off the bed.
“I—I’ve had these nightmares consistently since that night.”
The haunted gleam in his eyes sends a chill through me. He is dreaming about that night—being shot. I glance down to his stomach. His large scar is visible and stretches from one side to the other following the entry and exit points. The skin around the scar is taut with a slightly different texture, a permanent reminder of the fragile human condition.
I reach out and touch the raised skin, his eyes snapping to mine. I hold his stare as I lean down to kiss that spot etched into his skin, the mark of his survival. His eyes close, and his head tilts back against the headboard. I sit back and look at him—really look at him. This man, has a hard exterior, but is loyal and kind. My heart picks up its pace again, and I trap my bottom lip between my teeth.
“You saved me that night.” His voice is a whisper, and it tumbles around us in the dim room. “I don’t know if I would have made it if you weren’t there. Many nights I dreamed of what happened. You’re there, but always in a haze or a blur. I couldn’t see you. And at first, I couldn’t hear your voice. But recently, when you walked back into my life, it was the missing piece to a puzzle. Your voice rings in my ear most nights, telling me to hold on and that help is on the way.”
His admission shocks me. Luka isn’t the type of person to let anyone see into his soul.
“Every time I hear your voice, Kate, it stirs something in me. It takes me back to that night, the night that you told me to hang on, the voice that said I was worth saving.”
Chapter40
Luka
Kate stares at me. I can’t help but wonder what she thinks of my confession. I reach out and grab Kate’s wrist, my thumb tracing over the underside I love to caress. Her pulse flutters with life, and I can’t help but be grateful she is here, despite the wrong way I took her.
Never has a woman affected me this much. She invades my mind. The way she pulled me out of my endless nightmare and having her here with me, caring for me—
At times, I don’t recognize the man I am anymore. My father would say I’ve gone too soft—too weak—to be the leader of the Bratva.
Kate’s eyes linger on where my hands connect to her, and I pull her to me. My hand comes to the back of her head, and I drag her mouth to mine. I’ve been dreaming of her lips on mine ever since she placed a kiss on my upper lip outside her apartment.
Her kiss is unsure and timid at first, but I press into her, relishing the coconut aroma wafting off her. Her eyes open, and she pulls away from my kiss. I want to drag her back to me, for her to need me the way I need her. Giving her what she needs is my only mission.
Her hands wrap around my neck, and her forehead drops to my chest. Heavy breathing surges from us both. I don’t know if my rapid inhalation is from my nightmare or the tumultuous effect Kate has.
“You’re so beautiful,” I say. My body is screaming at me, but I hold still, admiring her, perfectly molded for me.
Mine.
She is perfect. Too perfect. Too perfect for me.
You don’t deserve to have her.
Ice-cold water douses me, and I freeze. I can’t, I can’t take from her more than I already have.
You don’t deserve to know her.
I took her, putting a target on her back, all because I couldn’tnotknow her. I needed the woman in my nightmare to become the woman of my dreams.
“Luka?” Kate asks, beautifully tempting. I want so much from Kate, too much.
Her face turns red, and rejection shines in her eyes.
That’s not what I meant.
Her hands come up to her face and she moves away.
Frustration roars at me.
Stupid, Luka.
Chapter41
Kate
