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I agreed, and I moved a gold brown curl from in front of her eyes. I couldn’t believe that I was standing by her, she was so close, and I could touch her, so I did touch her. We’d talked about it so much, what we would do if we were ever in the same room together, but it had been just a thought, not real life.
She was everything that I could have imagined and more. Amber was tiny, delicate even when compared to me. Her hair was this mass of dark brown and golden curls that were just to her shoulders. Her body was slim, but several places like her bust and hips were generous. Amber’s face was dark like burnt caramel and she kept staring up at me. Her smile was contagious, and she hid it behind her hand. Amber didn’t want me to see her this way, but if she knew how beautiful she was, maybe she would have preferred it. I know that I did.
“I had some time off and I got to thinking, where did I want to go more than anywhere else. I wanted to see you, Amber, that’s what I wanted. Nothing else seemed half as good as coming to see you.”
It was true, but she still blushed and looked away. “I didn’t think you would be so shy.”
Amber’s eyes skittered to mine, and she looked down, pulling her robe closed and then just looking up at me. “I didn’t think that you would just show up at my door. I didn’t have any time to get prepared. You can’t expect me to be ready.”
I agreed that I wasn’t expecting anything. I toyed with her hair, curling the strand in between my fingers. Amber was close and I wanted the two of us to have that time together. I kept thinking about everything that we’d said to each other. Amber on the other hand, was very nervous and she was trembling. Amber wasn’t prepared for this, not by a long shot, and there was nothing I could do. I had to slow down, even if that was the last thing on my mind.
“You look great, Amber. What do you need to be ready for?” I asked, slightly bemused. Amber did look great; she was barely wearing anything to distract me, and I couldn’t take my gaze away. She was getting ready for bed it looked like, and though she wasn’t reacting quite the way I wanted her to, I could only imagine that it wouldn’t take all that much to get her thinking about some of the other conversations that we’d had.
“You know, company and all.” She still wasn’t sure what to do. She wanted to ask me questions, I could see it in her eyes, and then I saw that she was upset. I worried that I had upset her somehow. I hadn’t meant to. Surely, she knew that it was supposed to be a good surprise. Why was she upset?
“I can leave if you don’t want me here. I am stupid. I saw this going a different way. Sorry about that, Amber.” I was dejected, I couldn’t believe that it had gone so wrong. I made my way toward the front door. She asked me where I was going, and I told her. I didn’t want to weird her out. I just wanted to see her since I had some leave time and it seemed like the thing to do. I could see now that maybe I was wrong to think that.
“No, please don’t go. I am happy to see you. I’m just shocked is all. I’ve been worried about you. I thought you had died or something because you just went silent for all that time. You really should have said something to me. You should have told me that you were going to be going silent for a while. I have been so worried about you.” Her voice broke and she looked away from me like she couldn’t stand to look at me. I hadn’t even thought that she would be upset. I should have known that Amber cared deeply. She acted like it, and I could tell that she did. It was good to know, good to feel, but I felt guilty about it as well.
I pulled her into my arms, something I’d wanted to do since long before I showed up. She was slight in my arms, but she felt like she belonged there. I was closer than I’d thought I would be. It was hard to focus when she was holding me in such a way, gripping me tightly like she never wanted to let me go. I could get used to that.
“It’s okay, Amber, I am fine. You have nothing to worry about. I promise you that. I am safe. I just took some time off because, after all these years, I had to see you. I had to see if what we have on paper translated in person.”
Her big brown eyes looked up at me and I knew then that it did. I was so attracted to her, needed to kiss her, that I didn’t hesitate to lean in and press my lips against hers. I caught her off guard again. This wasn’t going down the way I saw it happening in my head. It had gone so differently when I was playing it out. That kiss though, the feel of her lips against mine, was exactly what I had hoped it would be.
Amber moaned in the back of her throat when I kissed her, and the sound sent a surge through me. I knew that there was nothing I could do about it. I tried hard to stop the same surge that ran through me again. It made me want to deepen the kiss, pull her hard against my body and see what we could do next. Amber was perfectly still in my arms, giving in to my desires.
I pulled back because I realized how crazy this all was. I hadn’t been here, but a few minutes and we were already kissing. I was already trying to pour some of the years of sexual desire that I had for her all-in-one go. It was too much, overwhelming, and I knew better. I couldn’t act that way. I did feel like this was the only way forward, but I needed to wait.
When I looked at Amber, I could see that she was just as affected as I was. Her eyes were closed, lips still pursed and so help me I wanted to kiss her again. It was all I could think of doing. Amber finally met my gaze and she shyly looked away. She hadn’t been ready for it either by the looks of it, but I couldn’t regret it. How could I regret something that made me feel so damn good?
“Sorry,” I started.
“So, does it?” she asked me with a wry smile when she could finally compose herself enough to talk. The mischief in her eyes was good to see, but I had no idea what she was talking about. I asked her and she asked again if it had translated. I agreed that it did, and Amber grinned some more. We stood there for several minutes looking at each other like idiots. I didn’t know what to say, me, the man that always knew the right thing to say at the right time. Now, I was at a loss for words. I’d come a long way to see her, but after one kiss, I had no idea what it was that I was doing.
“Yeah, that translated. So, what were you saying in your letters? I can’t believe how badly I have missed them. I had a few things to take care of before I could go on leave and I’m sorry it took so long. You know how things are sometimes.”
She agreed, because I told her about it all. It was nice to think that I had someone out in the world that cared what happened to me. I didn’t have a lot of family, part of the reason I joined the service in the beginning, the camaraderie and a chosen family, but it was still lonely. To know that there was someone out there that cared about me, had made me feel different about all of it.
“I can’t believe you are here,” Amber started again. I could see that she was still in the kiss. I was too, but if I didn’t pull my thoughts away from it, I wouldn’t be able to control myself. I wasn’t going to be able to kiss her again. I needed to get it together. I had already pushed myself on her enough. I needed to give her time. I could see that.
“I will go get a hotel room now. I just was excited to see you and all that. It’s getting late, so why don’t I come back tomorrow. That way you will have time to get ready for me and all of that.”
She shook her head. “No, I don’t want you to go anywhere! You just got here.” Amber’s voice rose at the end there and it seemed like she really did want me to stay. Of course, I liked the idea of that. I had come a long way to see her, so I was glad that she wanted me here. I was still trying to figure out if this was a grand gesture or stalker-level surprise. It could go either way. Amber saying that she wanted me to stay was a good start about which way it was going.
“Well, it is late. I don’t want to bother you. It looks like you were ready for bed now.” My eyes couldn’t help looking at her up and down. Her robe was open again, her body revealed more to my hungry gaze. I can’t say that I was completely worked up, but damned if I wasn’t getting there. Did she know how beautiful she was?
Amber insisted that I stay. “I have an extra room and everything. You are not going to stay at a hotel. I will make you a real dinner, and you will stay here. We have a lot to talk about. I just can’t believe you are here. I just need to get my head around it.” She touched my arm and smiled. “I can’t believe you are here. I mean, here you are.”
Her hand was gone, and I was still warm where she’d touched me. There was something about Amber that made my body shake. She was just what I had hoped her to be. I had over thought it all with her, and I’d made her out to be perfect in my mind. Imagine my surprise to find out that she was just as awesome as I thought she was. That was the biggest surprise of all.
Amber showed me to the guest bedroom, and I noted that I was right across the hall from her. It wasn’t that far at all, but I knew that tonight it was going to feel like a mile. I’d just gotten here, and I already knew that I wanted to be close to her.
3
Amber
Irubbed lotion on my body after I got out of the shower, and I swear I had done the same arm three times. My mind was on the man that was only a few feet away from where I was on my bed. It was close and I wanted to go to him, but after the kiss and the way he had acted afterwards, maybe it was best to just wait until the morning.
