AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“When we found out about Andrew and Benny, it was like something inside me snapped. All of a sudden, the dread I’ve felt whenever I thought of facing my father again . . . it disappeared. I need the boys to be safe from Ludo, but I need them safe from Richard as well. Once this is all done, we have to find a way to keep Benny from him, legally or otherwise. I can’t let the abuse continue.”
This whole time, Rhett has been staring straight ahead. Now he nods to the house across the street. It may be dark, but the street lamps illuminate enough. It’s huge.
“That’s his house?” I ask.
“His and Corinne’s. That’s his new wife.” At that, he lets out a harsh breath and shakes his head.“New wife.They’ve been together since before Andrew was born. That’s twenty years—and who knows how long they were having an affair before she got pregnant. Fucking bastard.”
“Wait.” I sit up in my seat. “Why are we here?”
Rhett’s smile is almost regretful. “We’re not here to kill him. I just wanted to see what he’s built. And I need you to still trust me after tonight.”
A wave of unease passes through me. “What do you mean?”
“I need you to understand why I’m doing what I’m doing tonight. And I need you to know what I’ll never do, no matter how angry I get.”
“W . . . what?”
“It’ll make sense soon. Just let me explain.”
I watch him silently as he braces himself. My heart is in my throat as he starts talking.
“I was an accident. My dad was in medical school when my mom found out she was pregnant. Long story short, Richard had to drop out of school to support us. He ended up with no degree and a pile of student loans.
“Obviously, I don’t remember my infancy, but my mom told me it was hard. My dad was working multiple jobs, and she was trying to help out, but someone had to watch me.
“I think that’s where Richard’s problems with me began. He didn’t want a kid. And not only did he get one, but he had to sacrifice his career for me. Over the years, his resentment grew into hatred.” Here, Rhett pauses. He’s breathing heavily, and his hands are clenched in his lap.
“Rhett . . .”
“I’m okay.” He rubs his face. “You need to know all of this.”
It takes him a while to find his composure again. I’m about to suggest we put some distance between us and his dad’s house when he finds the strength to keep going.
“From what I remember, it started out with him having unreasonably high expectations of me. Whenever I didn’t meet those expectations, he treated it like a moral failing on my part. He used to tell me there was no good in me. I was seven the first time he said it. Fucking seven.”
My blood runs cold.Seven years old.Such a vulnerable, tender age. And to be told that there’s no good in you? There’s no knowing how much damage that could cause.
“Kids aren’t supposed to think about killing themselves,” Rhett continues quietly. “But I did. Every fucking day. Wondered what it would be like to get hit by a car and die. And then wondered if I could time it right, you know? Throwing myself in front of one before the driver would have enough time to slow down or swerve.”
My chest aches as I blink back tears. This isn’t the time to cry. I have no desire to derail Rhett from opening up about his childhood.
“Richard was horrible to me. But . . . somehow, through all of that, I think he still loved me. It was a selfish type of love, so maybe it’s not really love at all. Maybe it’s closer to a sense of entitlement.”
“Entitlement?”
“He still expected me to love him. Still expected me to care about what he thought. And I did, dammit. I cared for so much longer than I should’ve.”
“You were a kid,” I murmur, unsure of what else to say. It doesn’t matter because he’s not done.
“Any time I did something wrong, he’d . . .” Rhett’s eyes slide closed. His voice is weighed down with a misplaced shame that sends a tangible pain shooting through me. “He’d make me get on my knees and beg him for forgiveness. I’ve never been able to shake the way it made me feel,” he says. “Having him tower over me like that made me feel so small. Sopathetic.
“Maybe he was trying to feel some type of power when life had royally fucked him over. I don’t know. But he never let anything slide, even if it meant I had to beg for his forgiveness every day. Once he finally gave it to me, he always expected me to hug him and tell him I loved him. If I tried to avoid it, he’d force me into it.
“To this day, I still don’t understand why. The best that I can think of is that deep down, he knew how shitty he was being. But if I did those things, if I showed him affection and love like that, then he could justify it in his head. How could he be abusive if his kid still loved him, you know?”
There’s a moment of silence, and Rhett sniffles. All I want to do is hold him and tell him that Richard was wrong. That nothing could ever justify his actions. But the last thing I want to do is hurt Rhett more.
“Did your mom know?” I ask.
