AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Rae
November 15th…
I’ve been with, sorry at, Danny’s for two days now and the leak was shared on the eleven o’clock news as planned last night.
I’d assumed it would’ve been done the evening I got here. However, Danny stated that steps had to be taken to ensure it seemed natural. Accidental.
The person with the role of the oversharer? None other than Officer Guinness. I’d had my doubts when Danny told me that, but he convinced me Guinness was the perfect route.
Apparently, it wouldn’t be the first time he’s done this, though it would be the first done intentionally with the goal of helping. Seems as if he’s trying to get in the Captain’s good graces by being a team player.
It’ll take more than that to achieve my forgiveness with how he treated me.
But it is a step toward earning it.
Danny went to work yesterday, and again this morning, and has been in regular contact with Desiree Cutler, the cop currently occupying my house.
I’m trying to keep my brain distracted from the worry for Desiree and a curiosity as to whether the case being solved means I’ll never see Danny again.
I’d been told to make myself at home, Danny assuring me that I could make a video for my channel without overstepping. He said as long as I didn’t give away any information in regards to my location, I was good. Thankfully, I’d been able to make a list of things I would need and a co-worker of his retrieved them for me.
At the time, being able to upload a new recipe had been a hope I didn’t foresee coming true, but I’d added my equipment just in case.
Go me.
With everything set up, I assemble the ingredients I’ll need for a subscriber’s request. Their email states that they’d attempted the recipe twice, but neither were a success. I’d replied, asking for the original that they’d used to handwrite a copy for themselves.
It took longer than I want to admit to spot the discrepancy, but my mom reminded me of all the stuff taking space in my head when I’d talked to her about it earlier. Seeing the truth in that, I’d let myself off the hook and accepted that I don’t always have to be “on.”
Using the corrected version, one that included measurements and ingredients that had been missing, I press record and get started.
I lose track of time, my entire focus on what I’m doing, allowing me to forget everything but the task at hand. So caught up in it, and my narration as I explain what I’m doing and give a shout out to the person I’m doing this for, I miss the noise of the garage door signaling Danny’s arrival.
Which is how his face gets shown for a minute before I shift the camera’s position to crop him from view.
If this wasn’t live, I could edit him out, but that’s not a possibility. I’ll have to let him know as soon as I’m finished and cross my fingers I didn’t just mess up.
Signing off, I make sure it’s no longer recording before I go looking for Danny, finding him coming out of his bedroom.
Hair damp, water hitting his shoulders and wetting the material. I’m staring, but you would, too.
Wait, never mind. It’s an awful sight. Not at all a tempting thing to see. Save your time and look elsewhere.
“Sunshine?” Not only did we keep it as a code word, but he uses it frequently. Like an endearment.. He didn’t say it earlier, no doubt because he saw my camera on the tripod and assumed I’d know it was him coming home. He’d called before I began recording to check in, letting me know he’d be sooner than expected so I wouldn’t freak out when I saw – what to me would be a stranger’s face – in the house.
The way he’d taken to making concessions for my condition, as if it was no big deal when it was in fact, huge, had me falling a little for him.
Fine, more. Falling more.
There are moments when I think he feels it, too, but then the mood changes and I convince myself I imagined it. Maybe I’m just not worth the work being with me would require. Perhaps I should accept that my diagnosis means I’ll be alone, my hopes of a husband and children no longer attainable.
Every time we see each other, he has to, for lack of a better label, introduce himself to me. Let me know he’s safe.
How sad is that? I don’t know the face of the man I’ve fallen for?
My family doesn’t mind having to explain who they are. Sure, I see the sadness on their faces – yay me, I can still recognize that – as they do it, but they didn’t once hesitate to learn what I needed in order to make me feel comfortable.’
I bet Danny would as well, if you gave him a sign name.
