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“Hasn’t that owner been a complete asshole to you?” I asked, remembering the stories.
“Yes, he has been. But he’s my boss,” he reminded me.
“Then yes, I would love to meet with the Cougars before I go.”
“You’re not gonna get me fired, are you? The management sucks and the team sucks, but… What was I saying, again?”
I pointed at the phone he held inches from his mouth.
“Oops!” he said, laughing. Bringing the phone to his mouth, he repeated it. “Oops!”
“Tell them I’ll see ‘em,” I said, struggling to speak.
“He’ll see you.”
Merri listened for a moment.
“When are you gonna be there?” he asked me.
“I don’t know. When are we gonna be there?”
“We’ll be there in thirty minutes,” Merri declared before ending the call. Staring at me blankly, he said, “You were the designated driver, right?”
Looking down at the definitely more than three shot glasses in front of me, I called an Uber. On the ride to the stadium, I did my best to sober up. But, for some reason, I just got drunker.
Entering the stadium’s executive suites, I had to concentrate to keep the floor level. I did, though. So, when Merri and I entered the owner’s office with Coach and who I think was the general manager, I was feeling confident.
“Merri, could you?” the owner said, pointing to the door.
Fuck that, Mr. Power move.
“Coach and whoever you are, could you?” I said, mirroring the owner’s gesture.
The two men looked at the owner and then left with Merri. When we were alone, I sat in the chair in front of his desk. Falling a lot further than I expected, I realized that I was sitting lower than he was. The chairs weren’t even. What a dick!
“I assume you’ve been celebrating,” the old fart said, trying to be judgmental. But, fuck him.
“I got a starting quarterback offer from Seattle. Hey, remember when Merri brought me in to workout for your team and you were a complete asshole to him… and me. Good times, right?”
The old man squirmed.
“Yeah. About that. Things didn’t occur as they could have.”
“No shit! You made some veiled homophobic slur and dismissed me.”
“You have to understand that wasn’t about you.”
“You think it being about Merri is better?” I asked the idiot.
“I’m not saying that.”
“Then what are you saying?”
“I’m saying that the Cougars could really use a player like you. If you joined us, we could guarantee you a starting spot and a three-year contract.”
I nodded, considering it.
“That sounds good. But there’s a problem.”
