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“What do you mean?”
“In the car,” she said. “When you were talking about how Teo has to be possessive. Did you finish your point?”
I thought for a second. She was so close to me I could smell the coffee on her breath. She could probably smell the beer in mine. “Yeah,” I replied.
“You talk a lot about Teo,” she said, her hand suddenly on my chest, her palm flat against me. “But what about you?”
I felt my breath catch in my throat at her touch. Sofia had a way of making me feel alive, of making me feel something other than the chaos and stress that came with being a part of this gang.
“What about me?” I asked, my voice coming out as a low growl.
“You have everyone down,” she replied. “Their motivations, why they act the way they do. That’s what makes you good at your job, right?”
I nodded, my eyes locked on hers. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“But what about you?” she repeated, her hand moving from my chest to my neck. “What motivates you? Why do you do what you do?”
I hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to answer. Teo was the leader of our gang, the mastermind behind most of our moves. But I had always been the one behind the scenes, the one making things happen. I had always been content with that role, happy to stay out of the spotlight. “There’s protection in being the second-in-command,” I replied. “And I owe Teo my life in more ways than one.”
All my good intentions went out the window as soon as I locked eyes with her. I had spent months worth of aching want for her, and now was my chance to get everything that I wanted. No punishment. No Teo watching over us.
Just the two of us. No influence from an outside source. I wanted to shut her questions out and bent down, pressing my lips against hers. Plus, I would happily take any excuse to kiss her.
She melted into me and I slid one arm around her waist, pulling her in tight. My other hand went to her neck, tangling in her silky hair. Her hands automatically went behind my neck, pulling me closer. She pulled away from me breathlessly. “That wasn’t really an answer,” she said. “Do you only stay with him due to some sense of loyalty?”
I shook my head. “No. I love him,” I said quickly. “I love all of them. They’re my family.”
Sofia’s eyes flicked up to mine, the confusion in them obvious. “All of them?” she repeated.
I nodded once, feeling a sense of pride in my voice. It was rare for people outside of our gang to understand the bond we all shared, but Sofia was different.
“I know it sounds strange,” I said, my hand still resting on her waist. “But it’s the only way we can all survive.”
“I get it,” she said softly, placing a gentle hand on my chest. “I may not have grown up in this world but I understand what it means to protect your family.”
I put my hand on hers. “As for me,” I said. “It’s kind of complicated. I know I could get out of this, but I love this life.”
“You do?”
“Yes. I love the thrill of our work, I love the adrenaline. I love working with the boys, even when it’s hard.” I chuckled. “And I love making the money.”
She smiled and I found myself grinning happily in return. Her brown hair was blowing in the breeze and her lips were swollen from our kiss, but she just kept getting more and more beautiful. I moved away from her so I could give her a little space.
“I’m glad you can find happiness in this lifestyle,” Sofia said, her hand still resting on my chest. “I know it’s not for everyone.”
I drew her closer to me, inhaling her sweet scent. “What about you?” I asked. “Is this something you want to be a part of?”
She considered that for a long second, the wind whipping her hair against her sun-kissed skin. She was holding on to the railing still, her knuckles white from the grip. “I don’t know,” she finally said, her voice thoughtful. “It’s not exactly what I imagined for myself, but at the same time...I mean, I’m already here, right? And it feels like it should scare me more than it does.”
I nodded. I thought I knew what she meant. It wasn’t the same for me when I first joined the gang because I’d been a teenager, but I did enjoy it. The rush of danger, the sense of belonging, the thrill of getting away with something. It was all so addictive.
“I won’t push you into anything,” I said, my hand still resting on her waist. “But if this life is what you want, I promise you I’ll make sure you’re protected.”
She turned to me then, her gaze intense. “And if it’s not what I want?” she asked.
“Then I’ll help you find a way out,” I replied honestly. “I won’t force you to stay if you don’t want to.”
“And the rest of the guys?”
