AllFreeNovel
Share Us
His father.
Landon has been so closed off regarding the loss since the day it happened. He sat in the funeral home while so many offered their condolences and held his mother up. He never broke, he never cried, at least not where I or anyone else could see.
“Don’t you for a second think that there is ever a chance you and I wouldn't be an us. I’m not good at the feelings thing, you know that, but I need you to know that we are solid. There’s nothing in my life more whole than our little family. I love you Chloe, I love you and my little girl fiercely. I never meant to give you doubt, babe. I just don’t know how to face that he’s gone.”
“I’m not worried,” the last thing he needs right now is someone else to take care of and soothe. He needs to feel, he needs to know that it's okay to be upset and maybe even fall apart a little.
“You were, and you still are,” he kisses me softly. “Because if you weren’t you wouldn’t be out here by yourself with only your thoughts to keep you awake. I didn’t handle this well and I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I quickly attempt to regain my composure.
“It’s not,” he says, smiling for the first time since he came home hours ago. “But it will be. As long as I have you and Laya, it will be. You girls give me everything I need.”
“It’s okay to miss him ya know,” I lift my hand and drag my thumb along his jaw. “It’s okay to be sad, and it's okay tofeelLandon. You don’t have to spend every minute of each day taking care of everyone around you. You need to take care of you, You need to allow yourself to grieve. Your father was a good man, he was so good to me from the start.”
“He always took your side on everything.”
I laugh remembering how many times he’d stand behind me against Landon just to get a rise out of his son.
“Smart man,” I add and again Landon smiles. “Anyone on the outside could see how much he loved you.” I notice the way Landon’s throat bobs as he swallows hard. “You need to allow yourself to feel,” he nods though I’m not sure he’s truly hearing me. “Fall apart for once and let me hold you.”
He lifts his gaze to meet mine and I offer him a soft nod, just before he moves in and wraps his arms around me. Within seconds I feel his body tremble and I know for once; he’s letting himself cave to the ache he feels inside.
And...I’m grateful.
nine
Landon
“Are they here yet?”I ask looking around the diner in search of Chloe’s parents. I’m not sure if she told them that I was having a rough time, but Ben called this morning insisting we meet him and his wife for breakfast.
“Over there,” Chloe points and starts in the direction of her parents.
Laya wiggles in my arms, already trying her best to break free and I hold her tighter. She is much like her daddy and hates to be restrained in any way. She loves her freedom to kick and wail.
Ben stands when we reach the table and Leann follows. Both of them are eager to take their granddaughter. It is obvious. Neither one of them is looking at me or Chloe, but staring at Laya with smiles.
“How’s my little bug?” Leann is almost giddy, her fingers wiggling and she is humming with excitement.
“I’m good Leann, thanks, how are you?” I smile, Chloe giggles and Ben too, smirks.
It takes a moment for Leann to catch on and she rolls her eyes, but smiles too. Repositioning Laya I pass her off to her grandma and once again it's like no one else exists. Leann sits, holding the baby close to her chest, kissing the top of her head.
“How’s work?” Ben asks as we all sit down.
“Good,” I say as I reach out to help Chloe remove her coat. “Brooklet is normally quiet until it's not.” I chuckle, and he agrees. “Mainly minor calls, long nights of the guys heckling one another out of boredom, you have to sleep with one eye open for sure.”
“What can I get you two to drink?” Our waitress stands at the edge of the table with her notepad in hand.
“Coffee,” I say, then look over at my wife.
“I’ll just have ice water.”
The place is packed, with people standing in line waiting for the first available table. The conversations are swarming around us, people laughing and the clinking of glasses and plates echo over the dining room.
Reaching under the table I place my hand on Chloe’s thigh and she rests hers atop mine. Offering me a gentle squeeze I feel my nerves begin to settle. I’m not even sure why I feel so flipped around, all I do know it's Chloe who grounds me.
“I had a really nice visit with your mom and your aunt this morning.” I look toward Leann to find she isn’t looking at me but at my daughter. “I have a friend Margaret in Statesboro who owns a store called Whisper.”
