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“In between?”
“He could have some impairment, physically or mentally. Some individuals experience personality changes after brain trauma, some may have limited use of one side of their body, others experience chronic neuropsychological issues.” She let out a tired sigh. “It’s impossible to know at this stage what will happen, but I can tell you that positive thinking and a good support system will help ensure the best possible outcome. It’s good that he’s young and healthy. It’s good that you and your mom are here to support him, and we will do everything we possibly can to help him.”
Physical impairment? Personality changes? Neuropsychological issues?Noah’s mind churned with horrific possibilities. Dr. Hoffman put a comforting hand on his shoulder.
“It’s a lot to worry about, which is why I haven’t said as much to your mom. She seems... sensitive.”
“Yeah, that was the right call.”
“Don’t let the negative possibilities get you down. Remember, anything is possible at this point.”
“Yeah.”
The doctor stepped back and straightened her shoulders. “Let me know if you have any other questions.”
His thank-you stuck in his throat, and he made his way slowly outside.
Without remote keyless entry to guide him, Noah may never have located his mom’s tiny white car. Repeated pushing of the lock button on the key fob and the resultant tinny beeping led him to a corner of the enormous parking garage and the Hyundai’s flashing lights. Vanilla air freshener assaulted his nose as he opened the door and tossed his duffel into the passenger seat, followed by a sharp pain when the steering wheel assaulted his knee. Biting off a curse, he adjusted the driver’s seat and reminded himself to appreciate the moderate height he’d inherited from his dad instead of focusing on the pain in his knee.
The navigation app on his phone led him into the heart of the city, inspiring another wave of guilt. He hadn’t even seen the apartment Matt had been so proud to move into when he’d landed his first lawyering job after graduating last year.What a lousy brother I’ve been.
Buildings rose up around him, blocking the sky and hemming him in. The last turn brought him to a newer apartment building near Denver’s city center.
Noah drove into the tidy, well-lit underground parking lot and parked in the visitors’ section, then grabbed his duffel off the passenger seat and sought out the elevator. Matt’s apartment was on the top floor, at the end of a tastefully decorated hallway. Smiling at a passing neighbor lady and pretending he belonged, Noah dug out Matt’s keys and opened his door. He couldn’t help but chuckle at the sense of familiarity as the door swung open.
Tidiness wasn’t one of Matt’s virtues.
Closing the door behind him, Noah stepped over a bright-blue riding jacket on the floor and into his brother’s home. The place still smelled faintly of new paint and carpet in spite of the many takeout containers littering the kitchen on his left and the clothes and papers strewn around the living room straight ahead.
Huge, unadorned windows dominating two of the living room walls looked south and west over the city. Matt had invested in a couch, coffee table, and flat-screen TV, but those were the only furnishings besides the clutter. An open door in the hall displayed a washer-dryer stack, and a stray sock pointed the way to the single bedroom. Noah followed it, in search of the shower.
A framed southwest sunset picture hung above the unmade bed, and Matt’s mountain bike stood in the corner in a double bike stand. The empty slot in the stand had a narrower opening to accommodate Matt’s missing road bike.
What happened to the bike?Noah thought.Did it survive the wreck?
He wasn’t sure he wanted to know.
Turning his back on the remaining bike, Noah slid his duffel to the floor and collapsed onto the bed.
The pillow smelled like Matt.
A framed picture of their family on the nightstand caught his eye. It was grainy and off-center, having been taken with the cheap camera Matt had received for his fourteenth birthday. Mom had wanted a picture with all of them in it, and Dad—sober for the special occasion—had helped Matt figure out the timer. They’d piled up a few books to stabilize the camera, tilting the pile just right to get everyone in the frame. Matt had insisted on being the one to push the button, jumping in at the last second and throwing all of them out of line. Everyone was laughing.
It was the last picture of them all together. Dad had died two weeks later.
Noah had wasted so much time in self-imposed isolation. He hadn’t been there for his brother in years. What if Matt never woke up?
Emotionally exhausted, sleep-deprived, and surrounded by memories of his brother, Noah finally relaxed his defenses and gave in to his grief.
Chapter 39
Three, Two, One...
Me: Where the heck areyou when I need you?
Ivy:Umm... you’re the one who left the country. Not a good trip? Kids roast you on a spit?
Me:Kids were great. Trip was great. Just crossed the border into AZ.
