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“Abigail,” He places a hand on my leg, “Before our camping trip, the guys and I found a dead rabbit outside your bedroom window.”
“Point? Animals die all the time.” I flip the page of my history book and look over my assignment.
“Abbs, this one's head was almost completely sawed off. And then with the car and the blood and now this?”
I look up at Colin, confusion and anger written all over my face, “You all hid this from me? And that still doesn't mean anything. For all you know, the guy could have been targeting Ryan, and I just got in the way. If you think someone is after me, then why are you still here? Why not just leave.”
Dead animals are child’s play compared to the unimaginable horrors I have been through since I left this place all those years ago. But if a little bunny scares him, Parker, and Ryan so much––they don’t stand a chance if I tell them the truth about me.
My tone cuts deep as Colin’s face goes blank. I have never spoken to him, let alone any of them, this way before, and all I want to do is take this book and throw it at him.
Fuck it.
I chuck the book right at his head, but at the last moment, he dodges right, and it hits my floor lamp, causing it to crash to the ground and shatter the bulb.
Mom rushes through the door and into my room. “What the hell is going on in here?” She exchanges glances between both Colin and me. I just stare Colin down, making my intentions known that it is time for him to leave.
“I’m sorry, ma’am. I accidentally knocked over the lamp on my way out. I’ll bring a bulb tomorrow to replace it. Have a nice evening. Bye, Abbs.” He took the fall for me. Why would he do that? Doesn’t earn him any brownie points. Colin then gives me one last look, and I look out my window as he exits. I knew he’d leave, and even though I gave him the evil eye to get out of there, I still wish he would have stayed so I wouldn’t have to talk to Mom, whose hands are firmly set on her hips.
“Abigail, what is going on with you?” My mom asks while bending over and picking up my book. “Don’t think for one moment that I am going to let that nice boy take the blame for your poor actions.”
Fuck if I know. I feel like I am going insane. How do I tell my mom that I fucked all three of them, I am falling in love with all three of them, and I think it would be better for me just to disappear than come face to face with the consequences of my actions. The last thing I want to do is come in between their friendship, and that’s exactly what I’m doing. It’s easier for me to push them away and have them hate me than it is to destroy a lifelong bond. I will take it and bear the weight of it. I’m the harlot, the slut, the fucking whore. I refuse to be a homewrecker too.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” I can’t even look her in the eye.
“Abigail Jacqueline Burns, you are scaring me. So, you are going to tell me right here, right goddamn now, what the fuck is going on with you, or I’ll haul your ass into the car and take you to the hospital and force them to strap you down and make you talk.” Not that she would ever do such a thing; my mother hates hospitals. She refuses to step foot in one. Even when I was attacked, and they called her, she waited outside in the parking lot for me. Since I’m 18, I can sign things for myself and didn't need her to be there, but yeah, she and hospitals are a toxic combination, so the fact that she is threatening me with it means she must really be scared.
“FINE!” I yell out. “I’m a skank! Okay? Your daughter is a two-cent penny to the dollar, glorified Jolene.” I drop my face into my hands and start crying, crying for everything. Crying for what I messed up with the guys, crying for what my mom must think of me now. Crying for myself and how I am losing myself.
“Oh…” she chuckles. She smiles at me and erupts in laughter when she sees the seriousness on my face. Not just any laughter, but she hunches over, grabbing her stomach and laughing so hard I think she is going to pass out.
“Way to make me feel better, Mom.” I wrap my arms around myself and pout.
“I'm sorry, kiddo, it’s just who talks like that? And honestly, I had my suspicions. Truly, I thought you had to be at least sleeping with one of them, all three of them are really hot, and I say that with full cougar ownership but damn baby, all three. Give Mom a high five!”
She raises her hand in the air, and under no circumstances am I giving her a high five.
“Are you serious right now? I just confessed to sleeping with 3 of my friends.”
“It’s not the old days where if you slept with someone, you would have to walk around town shunned wearing a scarlet letter on your clothing. Women have every sexual right as men do to allow their freak flag to fly. And honestly, baby girl, I’m glad it was with them. They seem to really care for you.”
Her words open the floodgates, and I just let the tears pour. “I’m ruining everything with them, aren’t I? I like all of them and want all of them, but if I choose someone, that will destroy their friendship, but I don't want to choose.”
She looked at me with concern before wrapping me up in her arms and stroking my hair. “Baby, if they love you, they will allow you to have all of them. Whoever said you can’t have your cake and eat it too was a monster. Baby, you can have the whole damn bakery if you want it.”
I sniffle, letting out a huge sigh, “Thanks, Mom, you’ve always been there for me.” She continues rubbing my head and holding me until I eventually succumb to sleep.
forty-one
unknown
It’sbeenfourdayssince I had my fingers trailing Abigail’s body. She is an addiction I cannot kick.
Fuck, when I had to leave her the first time, it wasn’t by choice but by force. I never even touched her skin, but now that I have, now that I have had a taste, I am hungry, starving, ravenous for more. I need more. I want more.
The fact that these boys have been waiting on her hand and foot is cute, but they don’t see what I see. Clearly, she is destroying herself from the inside out. Abigail is not one to just fuck someone. She has feelings, and those feelings are growing for them. Even if I hate them and wish them all the worst death I could give, knowing she has feelings makes me feel… Nah, not even then. They will all die. I just hate that it is eating away at her.
That’s why I took it upon myself to make some changes. Today, I had one of my men pose as a water delivery boy, and as he was setting up the new jug on their dispenser, he switched out her medication. This new pill is still her pain meds but is now laced with another that will force her to eat. While she and her mom were in the kitchen watching him do this, I forced my way into her bedroom through her window. Abigail is a creature of habit. Every night before bed, she puts on lip balm. I switched hers out for one my payroll doctor friend made that has a highly potent sedative in it, so this way, when she applies and licks her lips, she will fall asleep.
