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Sure, what Conner and I had was juvenile at best, but I loved him and I loved our time together. Leaving my parents was hard, my little sister even more so, but I think leaving Conner was the hardest thing of all. Maybe because I knew, unlike my family, I wouldn’t be coming back for him.
He was my first love. My first boyfriend. My first everything. But he was content working on his father’s farm and living the country life he was born into. Not me, though. I was made for more than back roads and corn fields. I knew that from a very early age.
“I’m not hating.” Alina holds her hands up in front of herself. “I’m just saying, you don’t really know what you’re missing.”
I guess if anyone would know what’s out there, Alina would. Whether it be a man or a woman, depending on what she’s in the mood for, you’d be hard-pressed to find something she hasn’t tried at least once. At first, I thought she was a rarity, but I quickly learned a lot of college students are the same way, wanting the full experience and everything that comes with learning who you are.
Not me, though. I know who I am, and I know what I want—what I’ve wanted since I was ten years old when my mom took me to my first fashion show while we were on vacation in New York. I loved sketching and designing long before that day but that show, it changed everything. I was transfixed the instant the first model hit the runway and that was it for me. I have had one goal from that day on, get my degree and graduate with an internship with Laboe. And now here I am, in my first semester of my senior year, and that dream I’ve been chasing for so long is so close to becoming a reality I can almost taste it. Not a chance in hell am I going to let anything get in my way now, especially not some sleazy college boy who only wants what’s beneath my clothes.
“You may be right, but as I’ve said at least a hundred times over the past three years, I’m not interested in that side of college. I’m here for—”
“One reason and one reason only, I know,” she mocks what she knows I was about to say. “But if you had no interest in experiencing college as it’s meant to be experienced, then why come to a university at all? Why not go to some fancy design school and call it a day?”
I have to resist the urge to uncross my legs and kick her where she sits.
Of course, I wanted to go to a design school, that’s all I wanted, but it’s unnecessarily expensive and has little to no scholarships or grants to speak of. I couldn’t do that to my parents. They never said as much, but I knew they couldn’t afford it. So without really consulting them on the matter, I narrowed down a couple of universities that offered a prestigious enough art program to qualify to work at Laboe, applied for every grant and scholarship under the sun, and the rest is history.
“You know why,” I grumble.
“It wouldn’t kill you to have a little fun, though.” She clucks her tongue, not the least bit apologetic about hitting me where it hurts. That’s Alina for you. She’s not afraid to say what she’s thinking, even if it hurts your feelings. It was a lot to take in the beginning, mainly because I had never met anyone like her before, but after three years, I’ve learned to just let it roll off my back. She’s not trying to be mean. She’s just honest to a fault.
“I do have fun,” I argue. “I go out with you. We do all kinds of things. I just don’t wantthatkind of distraction. I can’t afford it. Not when I’m so close to landing this internship.”
“I get it.” She finally concedes. “But it is possible to fuck and not get attached.”
“Maybe for you, but I know myself. I fell for Conner the first time he kissed me. I didn’t even like him before that. One kiss changed it all. I love big, Alina, you know that. I can’t just sleep with someone and not let my heart get involved.”
“Okay.” She picks at a blade of grass. “I won’t bring it up again.”
“Until you do.” I snort out a laugh.
“This time I won’t.” She sticks her tongue out at me.
“I’ll believe it when I see it.” I grin. “So who are you picking for your project anyway? I can’t imagine the team was all that thrilled when Coach Cook told them what he and Professor Clemens had come up with.” I’m quick to change the subject back to the matter at hand.
“What I would have given to be a fly on that wall.” She tips her head with a small laugh. “We should have seen this coming, though. Theyaredating after all. It makes sense that he would help her class with the volunteers she needed for the project. Besides, this isn’t the first time Coach Cook has offered up his players as sacrifices. Do you remember last year when we had the classroom models come in?”
“Like I could forget.” I groan. “My group had the extreme displeasure of paintingMr. I’m better than everyone.”
“Oh, come on, Archer isn’tthatbad.”
“Archer Copeland is the most arrogant tool I’ve ever met, and you won’t convince me otherwise.” I shake my head violently.
“Or maybe you just think that because he made you uncomfortable in a way you’re not used to.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Oh, come on, Rory, that man is sex on a stick. You can’t tell me him flirting with you didn’t make you feelanything.”
“It did. It made me feel nauseous. And that wasn’t flirting. He was taunting me. Toying with me and for no other reason than he could,” I bite. “You know he still winks at me every time I see him. Like he finds humor in the fact that I had to stare at him in nothing but a loin cloth for three straight days.”
“Well, in his defense, youarekind of easy to rile.”
“I am not!”
“You are,” she quickly disagrees.
“Whatever. It doesn’t matter anyway. I wouldn’t touch that man with someone else’s hand. I see him around campus, how he always has a different girl under his arm. It’s gross.”
