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JJ had told me his best friend used to be a drug addict, but again, I honestly didn’t give a shit the guy had fallen back into it.
“And the reason you didn’t show up at eight that night when you said you’d be over to talk?”I asked, still not ready to just up and forgive him because he’d asked me to.It was the no show, no call that had hurt more than his running off to help the man he loved when he’d been with me.
“The day we got him home from the hospital, he OD’d.With his wife and two kids in the house.”
Shit.
That tugged on the empathy but not for him—his children.
“That was an hour before I said I would be over.I tried to call you the next morning but couldn’t get in touch with you,” JJ said, studying my face like a true detective, trying to figure out my thoughts and feelings.“I’m assuming you blocked me.”
“I did.I don’t have time for bullshit, JJ.I thought what we had going on was something more than getting off.Hell, you told me you felt it too, and yet you couldn’t be bothered to shoot me a quick text.So, what the fuck?”
“Alex…”
I didn’t speak.There was no point.He’d made it clear where his heart belonged—where he would always go back to.The man who came first in his life.
“Look.”JJ sat forward, elbows on his knees.“While a part of me will forever care deeply for Alex, I’m done being used by him.Done holding his hand.Done picking up his pieces.Yes, I’ll look after Teresa and the boys as much as I can, but the relationship I thought I’d had with him is over.”
Loving someone then deciding you’re done isn’t just a flip of a switch.It had taken two years—and another man—for me to recognize the fact I was no longer in love with Xavier.
“So you’ve broken things off with him?”I asked, wanting to hold my breath but not daring to.
“Not exactly.”JJ’s lips thinned, and he glanced around the living room.“He’s blowing me off, making up excuses whenever I try to get a moment alone with him.I’m pretty sure he’s back in the drugs even though his wife doesn’t think so.”
JJ sounded sincere.Appeared it for damn sure with those dark eyes returning to my face to stare with an intensity that had me ready to drop my pants and bend the fuck over.Wanted his slow lovemaking, his cum dripping out of my ass once he finished bringing us both to completion.
But a third time wasn’t going to be the charm between JJ and I.I’d learned my lesson twice over.
“You’re welcome the bedroom down here,” I motioned toward the opened doorway back the hallway.“Maybe in the morning I’ll be more open to further conversation, but I’m exhausted.You look like you are too, to be honest.”
JJ rubbed a weary hand over his face.
“You need to sleep,” I stated, standing and moving to grab his bag.
“Between Alex’s bullshit, readying for court, and another case, I’m worn thin.”
“Something about the mountain air always makes me pass out regardless of my mind,” I told him, heading toward the bedroom, every inch of my body aware of his presence inside the cozy cabin.
I’d already replaced the sheets after Dad and Jacob’s visit, so I tugged back the comforter and set JJ’s bag on the foot of the bed, antsy to escape the energy of him wanting to pull me in.
Turning, I found him too close for comfort.Hands fisted at his sides, he stared at me, and I recognized the longing in his dark eyes.
“JJ,” I whispered, my heart pounding again but more from wariness and a sense of self-preservation than lust.
“I know…” His gaze dipped to my mouth, and I fought to keep my tongue from flitting over my lower lip in invitation.He stepped closer, hesitant as though approaching a wild cat.
I didn’t move—not away and not in response to his warm lips pressing against mine.
He sighed at the light contact, and I fought off that feeling of coming home.“Kell,” he whispered over my mouth, and my walls cracked enough that I kissed him.
Soft swipes.Gentle flicks of our tongues together.Heat simmered but remained on the back burner.He didn’t push, but I wouldn’t have let him anyway.
I wouldn’t be able to deny my emotions if we got too intimate.
It took every ounce of willpower I had to step away and release my hold on his hoodie I hadn’t realized I’d been clutching.
“We’ll talk more in the morning?”he asked, desperation leaking into his tone.
