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She shook her head. “On a stretcher. This is a big undertaking. I’ll be there, the respiratory care department will come, and Lisa, the night nurse will be there too.”
He glanced toward the window. “What’s it like outside?”
She chuckled. “Hovering somewhere around minus two. Sure you want to go out there?”
Keith smiled. “Only if I’m wrapped in about five million blankets.”
Anna laughed. “I don’t know about five million, but I’ll make sure everything is covered except your face.”
“Thank you. How far are we going?”
“To the meditation garden behind the hospital. It has a view of the lake—it’s not called Lakeview Hospital for nothing—and if it’s frozen over enough, there’ll be ice skaters out there.”
“I’d like that.” Keith squared his shoulders, even though it took real effort to do it. “Can we do it now? I don’t want to wait any longer. I’ve said my goodbyes.”
“You don’t want your family around you?”
Keith shook his head. “Let them remember me as I was today. You can call Heidi when I’ve gone, but no, I don’t want her here.”
Anna studied him. “It’s your decision. And yes, we can go to the lake, as long as we don’t stay out there too long. You’ll still be on the porta-vent.”
“Okay.” He smiled. “I’m ready for my last look at the world.”
Keith had entered the final leg of his journey, and he was more than ready to see it to its conclusion.
It was a short trip, and already the icy air had frozen the tip of his nose, but he wouldn’t have missed it for all the world. His body was hidden beneath a swathe of warm blankets, and although it was way too cold to feel the warmth of the sun, he turned his face toward it, eyes closed.
“Ready to go inside?” Anna asked from beside him.
Keith nodded, unable to speak. He caught the chirping of birds in the stark branches of the trees. The sun hung low in a cloudless sky, heading toward sunset.
It was all he’d hoped for.
“We’ll soon be back in your room,” Anna said, bending to speak in a low voice. “Then I’ll make you comfortable.”
Keith managed a nod. He’d had enough pain.
Back in his room, Anna, Lisa, and two of the other nurses helped him back into his bed. Anna left him for a moment, but returned with a tray containing a glass of water and a bowl with steam rising from it.
“It’s turkey soup,” she told him. “I thought you might like to try a mouthful.” She set the bowl down on his table. He watched as she hung a small plastic bag on his IV stand, then connected it to the main IV tube via a port.
“This is the morphine drip. It’s administered a drop at a time so it will infuse slowly. You should feel its effects soon. It relaxes the work of breathing so you won’t choke.” She brought her hands to his neck. “I’m going to remove the porta-vent now.”
He tried not to panic as she disconnected him from the machine. Lisa handed him a spoon, and he brought a mouthful of soup to his lips.
Anna nodded. “You can swallow with the trach in.”
He swallowed, and almost instantly erupted into choking. He wiped his lips. “It was worth it for that one taste.” Anna handed him the glass with a straw, and he took one sip. Then he leaned back against the pillows, suddenly tired beyond measure.
Anna’s expression was kind. “You’ll sleep now. It won’t be long. You can probably already feel the effects of the morphine.”
Keith grabbed her hand and squeezed it. “Thank you for... everything you’ve... done for me.”
She swallowed. “Thank you for being such a good patient. Now close your eyes and rest. I’ll be right here.”
He closed his eyes, and realized Anna had been correct—he could feel the pain melting away, taking with it any discomfort he’d suffered when he’d tried to breathe.
I wish I could have seen Yuri one last time.
