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“Heartburn again?”
I scowl and take a deep breath wishing away the pain.
“Yes. It’s this damn bra I think. It’s way too tight,” I scoff as I unhook the clasp behind my back and pull the straps through the sleeves of my shirt.
“You want to know what I think?”
I shoot her a questioning look.
“It’s not the tight bra. And I’m beginning to think it’s not heartburn either. I think it’s your anxiety. Your body is telling you to slow down and be calm for longer than a second.”
What? I know stress can sometimes trigger things like acid reflux, but I never considered that to be the case with me.
“Maybe,” I admit.
There’s a soft and concerned look on her face, but the room falls silent. So quiet I can hear the rapid beating of my pulse.
Isn’t every medical student tired and stressed? This has to be normal. Common, even. The fact that I’ve been getting random bouts of heartburn, barely keeping my eyes open on the ride home from school, or tanking up on energy drinks to work on my computer late into the night is not that concerning. I’m just a hard worker. Dedicated to my studies and my future.
Kee toys with the straw in her cup and avoids eye contact. She’s letting me think to myself for a beat. That’s something I’ve always adored about her. We communicate well with each other in our friendship, and she always leaves me space to gather my thoughts.
It’s then I realize how tight my jaw is. How bunched up my shoulders are. My back aches, there’s tension between my eyes, and a loud voice in my brain won’t shut up about how long it’s been since I’ve checked my email.
The room starts to spin, and at first, I think there might be some sort of earthquake happening. Instead, I fall forward and my face lands straight on the island countertop.
* * *
The pungent smell of a hospital is unmistakable. Before I even muster up the strength to open my eyes, I know exactly where I am.
“She’s doing fine. Just resting right now,” a voice whispers.
I crack an eye open to see Keanna facing the window on the other side of the room. There’s a steady beep of the vital monitor next to me, but it doesn’t tamp down the deep throbbing happening somewhere on my face.
When I reach up to feel where the pain is coming from, I rustle the covers and it causes Kee to whip around and face me.
“Oh! Well, actually, she’s awake!” She rushes to my side and shows me the name on the phone screen before putting it back to her ear.
Warren. Great.
“Can we call you back? Yeah, I promise,” she nods her head and hits the end button.
I look for a hint of panic in her expression when she pulls the chair up next to the hospital bed. Even when she grabs my hands and meets my gaze though, she doesn’t look too worried. A little pissed off maybe.
“They had to put the IV in your hand you know? You were so dehydrated they had to find a vein elsewhere.”
I look down at my hand where the sting of the needle is coming from. I was eating and drinking enough, wasn’t I?
“I know that look. You’re about to argue with me.” Her hand squeezes mine a little tighter. “You’re smart, B. So smart that it scares me sometimes. But one thing I think you’ve forgotten about in all of your constant focus on school is to take care of yourself.”
I rub the side of my nose like I have an itch, but really I’m just trying to sniff away oncoming tears.
“It’s not that I’m going to argue with you. I understand. It’s just that…” For the first time in a while, words escape me. I don’t know how to describe how I feel at the moment. I’m overwhelmed by the fact that I’ve landed myself in the hospital. If I wasn’t so tired I could probably think straight. I lay my head back on the abysmally thin pillow and close my eyes. “You’re right.”
Most friends would tease you to repeat that phrase or write it down for them so I’d never forget admitting that she has a point. But Keanna doesn’t. She just wraps her free hand around my shoulders and leans in for a hug.
I release a long-held breath into her hair and decide to stop fighting my emotions. The waterworks start flowing free and fast. Admittedly, it feels good to let it all out.
“Can I make a suggestion?”
