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And fuck me, but I was afraid to push her. Afraid to push for more because it might push her away, and if all I had were a few days left, I wanted every goddamn minute of them.
“I can’t stop her from leaving,” I said like it was what everything boiled down to.
“But you can give her a reason to stay,” he rumbled deeply and gave me a wink.
Before the conversation could go any farther, the guide led us off the path to a small clearing where there was a fire pit, grill, and wooden benches. The sun dipped toward the horizon, glowing orange as the tips of the mountains pierced its orb.
We tied up the horses and settled onto the benches, the girls collecting on one and the guys on the other, while the guide cooked up some burgers. While Archer and Gunner talked, my gaze continued to stray toward Reese.
Something was off. Wrong.
She hadn’t planned on coming with me tonight; I knew she’d refuse before I even asked…but I couldn’t stop myself from asking. Just like I couldn’t stop myself from wanting her. And it was why walking out to see her parked in front of the garage made me do a double-take. There was no way she would’ve changed her mind if something didn’t happen; something with her mom, I assumed after she’d fled the house earlier.
Maybe when the ride was over, she’d tell me, but for now, I was just happy to see laughter crease her face rather than worry. Keira, along with Hunter’s wife, Zoey, Gunner’s wife, Della, and Ranger’s wife, Sydney, chatted and laughed with Reese like they were the oldest of friends. And once more, I felt myself falling into the trap of thinking it could always be like this.
If she just stayed.
* * *
The storm thundered in warning, holding back its fury until we’d returned to the barn, thanked our trail guide, and headed for the parking lot. Goodbyes were rushed and splotched with giant raindrops before Reese and I scrambled back into the Bronco, both of us sinking into the seat with an exhale and a laugh as the skies broke wide.
Rain poured from the dark clouds like nature opened up a fire hydrant. Within the span of minutes, it was a concert of rain and wind and lightning, beating and swirling around the car.
“I’ll take you back to your mom’s. Not letting you drive home in this,” I declared, slowly turning out of the driveway onto the main road back to Jackson.
There wasn’t even a tremor of protest as the rain beat down on the windshield so hard, it was almost impossible to see. I let off the gas and allowed our pace to slow. It wasn’t a race.
“Thank you,” she said a few minutes into the drive, the rain pelting the car in furious sheets.
“Don’t, Reese.” I shook my head.
“Don’t what? Be grateful? You invited me, and I turned you down and then showed up at the last minute. Let me say thank you—”
“How about you thank me by telling me the truth? Why’d you change your mind? What happened when you got home from the store?”
My question was met with her deep inhale, but I wasn’t going to back down. Archer was right. I had to give her a reason to stay—and that reason was going to be that she could count on me always. For anything.
“My mom and I argued about what she said earlier.”
“About kids…”
She shifted in the seat. “More than that. Relationships in general.”
My hold on the steering wheel tightened, and I squinted.Holy fuck, this sudden storm was bad.
“Why don’t you want a relationship, Reese?”
“I’m leaving.”
I tensed. That wasn’t an answer. It was a shield.
“Bullshit,” I said. “You don’t want a relationship in the city either. Why? What happened?” I tensed, the unthinkable rolling through me. “Who hurt you?”
“Who—no one,” she exclaimed and let out a bitter laugh. “No one hurt me. That’s the point. No relationship means no one gets to hurt me, Decker. How hard is that for everyone to understand?”
The truth hit me like a wrecking ball. Her independence. Her distance. Her desire for no complications.Her past.Her admiration for her mother’s strength also made her determined to avoid her mother’s weakness, the thing that made her need to be strong in the first place: love.
“I’d never hurt you.” There were a lot of things I could’ve—should’ve—said, but that was the only one that came out. The only one that seemed right.
