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How wrong we were.
On arriving back in the waiting room, we found everyone, even Ellie, sitting in the uncomfortable blue chairs. Ellie was crying into Michael’s shoulder, and Joey and my mother were staring straight ahead, pale-faced, eyes filled with despondency. As Jason and I strolled into the room hand in hand, only Michael flicked his eyes in our direction.
“What’s happened?” I whispered. I’d started to tremble from the almost tangible sadness in the room, and Jason’s hand gripped mine tighter as we waited for someone to fill us in.
“Drew’s awake,” Michael said, giving us a tight-lipped smile. “But… there’s bad news. He’s got… there’s been some damage to his spinal cord. He’s lost the feeling in his legs. The doctors are with him now doing a few tests, but he’s going to need some scans to see exactly what the problem is and probably surgery.”
I glanced at Jason as his face drained of all color.
“What… what does that mean?” he asked. “Will he… I mean… he’ll be able to walk again, right?”
Michael gave a small shake of his head. “We can’t tell at the moment.”
“So… he could end up in a wheelchair?”
“Yes. It’s a possibility.”
I let go of Jason’s hand and wrapped my arms around him as he sagged against me, and tears rained down my cheeks.
This wasn’t fair. Not any of it. Drew was alive, and that was something to be grateful for, of course, but the idea of him being unable to walk? No. He had to walk down the aisle with my sister. He had to be able to run around with their children, and he had to get back on the road with the band and do what he did best.
“Why didn’t you call?” Jason asked coldly. “You said you’d call if anything happened.”
He directed the question at my mother. She had been the one who promised to get in touch, and Drew waking up was a pretty huge deal.
She turned her head toward us. “I’m sorry. I was taking care of my daughter.”
“You have two daughters,” Jason stated.
The insinuation that she hadn’t been taking such good care of me lately practically echoed around the room, causing me to close my eyes against the awkwardness. What could I say? He wasn’t totally wrong. Since I’d gotten home, she hadn’t made much effort to understand what I’d been through or how I felt about it, and if she and Dad had had their way, I’d still be in England. However, she was still my mother, and recent events aside, a damn good one.
Ellie raised her head from Michael’s shoulder and glared at Jason. “Everything’s always about you, isn’t it?”
My eyes flew open. I got that Ellie was upset, but I thought since she and I had partially made up, she would be okay with Jason too. She had bigger things to worry about, after all. Yet her words and tone said otherwise. It was as if she’d flicked back to the past, dug deep down inside herself, and spat out something that had been lurking inside her. Something that shouldn’t have been there anymore because she’d always sworn she was over everything that happened before. I guess some wounds were more raw than others.
“That’s not fair,” Jason said. “If it was Lucy in Drew’s position, how would you feel if nobody bothered to tell you she woke up after a near-fatal accident?”
“That’s not why you’re upset. You’re upset because right now, the world isn’t revolving around you. It wasn’t enough that you and Lucy overshadowed our engagement. Now this has to be about you too.”
Jason stiffened, his anger growing and filling the room so much it was almost suffocating. Fury seemed to emanate from him in thick waves, slowly pulling us all under. My own emotions were all over the place. Her mention of Jason and I overshadowing her engagement news was uncalled for and deeply unfair, as was her accusing Jason of being selfish. But I knew my sister. She wasn’t thinking straight, even though she looked as though she knewexactlywhat she was saying.
“What happened to you?” he asked in a low voice, his eyes fixed on Ellie. “You used to be understanding. You used to be considerate. For the last few months, you’ve been judgmental, bordering on heartless when it comes to your own sister. Now you want to sit there and tell me that I want to make my brother’s condition about me? Well, fuck you. I was beside him in the wreckage. I watched, helpless, as he was dragged out of that bus, not knowing if he’d wake up. I was at his bedside the whole time, Ellie. I sat beside him, praying he’d wake up. Praying he’d be okay. I didn’t do that because I had to or because I expect some kind of thanks for it. He’s my brother. My big brother. And none of you could pick up the phone and let me know he woke up?”
Michael stood up. “Jason, please.”
“No, Dad! I know Drew is the main priority right now, but it would have taken a few seconds to call and say the words we’ve all been waiting to hear for the last twenty-four hours!”
Ellie turned her gaze to me. “You haven’t said anything.”
I looked into her eyes, searching for a sign that my sister and best friend was still in there somewhere, but I couldn’t find her. She was too caught up in fear and anger to think or speak rationally, and nothing I said could change that. I tightened my hold on Jason. “And I’m not going to say anything. I’m not getting into a fight that shouldn’t be happening.”
“You think he’s right. You think someone should have called instead of us trying to come to terms with what’s happening?”
My eyes widened. “Of course someone should have called! The only reason we weren’t here was because Mum told Jason to go back to the hotel and get some rest. Since when did Jason stop being a part of Drew’s family? Since when was it not important forhimto come to terms with what happened? And since when did we stop working through things together? Especially things that affect both of our families.” I bit my lower lip to stop myself from saying any more because I hadn’t really meant to say anything. But she wasn’t being fair.
“Lucy is right,” Michael said. “This was my mistake, though.” He turned to Jason and me. “I’m so sorry, but it was a huge shock, and I just didn’t think. I would have called you, but I’m sorry I didn’t do it sooner.”
Jason shook his head. “It’s always the same, Dad. Always.” He took a step away from me but reached for my hand. “I need a break, Luce. I’ll be back later.”
