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I sit down heavily, feeling numb and sickened. This is my life now – violence, betrayal, and loss. Killing them didn't ease the pain of losing Raven. If anything, it only deepens the void she left behind. The music in my head, which used to be a comforting escape, now just feels like a mocking soundtrack to the horror show that is my reality.
Eventually, I force myself to stand up and face the gruesome task at hand. The smell of blood is thick in the air as I approach the bodies, trying not to think about how these men were once like family to me. My hands shake slightly as I begin to pull them down from their restraints.
"Sorry, fellas," I mutter under my breath, feeling a pang of guilt that only adds to the weight on my shoulders. But I can't afford to dwell on it, not when I have bigger problems consuming my thoughts.
Raven. God, I miss her. I'd give anything for just one more chance to make things right, even if she insists there's no hope. But what could I possibly do to win her back? She's chosen a life of piety and devotion, far removed from this world of violence and chaos.
"Think, Teddy. You're not a complete dumbass," I tell myself, wiping sweat from my brow. "There has to be something you can do."
As I work, my mind races through countless scenarios, each more desperate than the last. What if I left the family behind, started fresh somewhere new? Would that be enough to prove my love for her? But the thought of abandoning my brothers makes my stomach churn with guilt. No, there has to be another way.
I just need to find it.
There has to be something I can do to win back the only woman who's ever truly understood me, even if it means risking everything in the process.
* * *
The smell of death clings to my nostrils as I finish wrapping up the lifeless bodies of Carmine and Enzo. It's not a pleasant scent, but it's one I've become all too familiar with in this screwed-up family business. I can't help but feel a pang of guilt as I stare down at their faces, covered in bruises and dried blood. As much as Constantino was the one to end their lives, I wonder if their deaths are ultimately on my hands.
"Ready to take these two out for a ride, Teddy?" Constantino's voice breaks me out of my thoughts. His smirk sends shivers down my spine; that damn grin always means trouble.
"Wait, take them where?" I ask, suddenly dreading the answer. I figured we'd go straight to the crematory, but with Constantino, things are never that simple.
"You'll see," is all he says, still smirking like the devil himself.
With a heavy sigh, I lug the bodies into the backseat of the van, trying my best to ignore the weight of their limp forms. How the hell did I end up here?
As Constantino drives, my uneasiness only grows. The silence in the car is thick, suffocating, like the darkness outside the window. My mind races with questions, but every time I open my mouth to ask, the words die on my lips. It's not that I'm scared of Constantino—okay, maybe I am a little—but something about his demeanor tonight has me on edge.
"Spit it out, Teddy," he finally snaps, his piercing green eyes flicking towards me for a moment before returning to the road. "What do you want to ask me?"
"Where are we taking the bodies?" I blurt out, unable to hold back any longer. "And why? What's the plan?"
"Patience, little brother," he says, his voice suddenly soft and almost gentle. "All will be revealed soon."
I swallow hard, the taste of fear mixing with the stale air in my mouth. The radio plays "The Reason" by Hoobastank and it sets the mood perfectly for this twisted family outing. As the car speeds through the night, I can't shake the feeling that Constantino's taking us all down a path we won't be able to escape from. And yet, here I am, in the damn passenger seat.
"Shit," I whisper to myself, staring into the darkness outside. I try to keep my voice steady. "Can you at least tell me what your plans are for the family? It's obvious that Primo and Giovanni don't want the job anymore, so where does that leave us?"
Constantino smirks, focusing on the road as he speaks. "I do have every intention of taking control of the family, Teddy. But I'm not interested in turning it into some legitimate enterprise like our dear brothers wanted."
"Could have guessed that." My heart clenches at his words, fear and curiosity mingling together.
"Mob families exist for a reason, little brother. We've served a purpose for decades," Constantino continues, his tone cold and calculating. "Our power has waned because of Primo's and Giovanni's foolish attempts to go legit. I plan to fix that. Starting now."
"By doing...what exactly?" I ask hesitantly, unsure if I even want to know the answer.
"You'll see," he replies enigmatically, pulling the van to a stop outside a familiar cathedral. "Grab the bodies from the back, will you?"
The same cathedral where I found Raven. My stomach churns as I reluctantly comply, lugging the wrapped bodies out of the car one by one, their dead weight making my arms ache. Constantino helps me with the second body, and we drag them inside the dark, imposing building.
"Constantino, what are we doing here?" My voice echoes in the empty space, anxiety gnawing at me. "I'm supposed to clean up scenes, not make new ones." He doesn't answer, just stares at the crucifix looming over us, an inscrutable expression on his face.
"Come on," he says, dragging the lifeless body of Carmine behind him. He lets it go unceremoniously and then grabs something out of his back pocket.
He pressed it into my hand and I look down to see what it is.
The weight of the cold metal spike in my hands sends a shiver down my spine. Constantino, his face set in steely determination, directs me to help him with Carmine's body first. As we work together, positioning the corpse against the empty cross to the left of the crucifix, one of the ones that belonged to the thieves that refused to repent. It dawns on me what my brother intends to do.
