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The cold, damp dungeon has become a familiar place to me. The walls are slick with moisture, and the air hangs heavy with the scent of mildew. I can hear the constant drip-drip-drip of water echoing through the darkness.
There's something that happens to you when you're locked in a cage for long enough. Time seems to move at its own pace, and once you get past the terror and the panic attacks, you actually have a lot of time to sit and think about things in the dark.
I regret how I behaved with Teddy when he came to visit me. I could see that he was distraught, and I could feel it too. And rather than turn myself towards helping him in those moments, I tried to beg him in ways I used to use and am not proud of to let me go. I know better than that. No one ever truly does anything in this world based on the pleas of other people.
The other thing I had time to think about was those two men that were the ones who convinced Teddy to put me down here. Carmine and Enzo?
I remember that one time I passed Carmine in the hallway, he looked guilty. I think back to the fundraiser. I definitely saw them talking to Declan and a few other people that seemed to be with Declan. I don't know exactly what's going on here, but it seems like they're hiding something.
I know that Teddy isn't the type to ever want to get into the business side of things. He always said that about his family's business.
"Teddy, don't let them control you," I whisper into the darkness, though he's not here to hear me. "You're better than that."
In the silence that follows, I can't help but wonder if my words will ever reach him. Will Teddy be able to break free from the tangled web of lies and deceit that surrounds him?
As for me, I know one thing: if I ever make it out of this place, I won't let my past hold me captive any longer. I'll find a way to escape the darkness and forge my own path, whatever that may be.
I close my eyes and say a prayer, my voice barely audible in the damp dungeon. I'm not sure what I believe anymore. Father James says I need to keep my faith, but it's hard when you're trapped in a cage, surrounded by darkness.
"God, if you're out there..." I start, swallowing hard. "Help me find the strength I need right now."
As I pray, I continue to wonder whether I truly ever had faith. Maybe I only clung to it as a way to escape my troubles. To numb myself from the pain of my past.
"Teddy," I whisper, even though he can't hear me. "I want to forgive you for this. I know this can't really be your fault."
But, deep down, I know that the life I thought I might have with him may never materialize. We're both so damaged, so caught up in our own worlds of pain. Is there any hope for us? Or are we destined to walk separate paths, fighting our demons alone?
"Give Teddy the courage to do what's right," I murmur, tears streaming down my face. "And give me peace, whatever that may be."
As I finish my prayer, the sound of footsteps echoes through the dungeon. My heart races—could it be Teddy coming back to see me? Or is it someone else, someone dangerous?
"Raven?" a voice calls out softly. "It's Father James."
"Father," I reply hesitantly. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm checking on you," he explains, his kind eyes meeting mine through the bars of my cage. "And I want to tell you about Teddy. He's really struggling."
"Is he?" I scoff somewhat bitterly, despite the prayers that still hang on my tongue. "I hope he's not uncomfortable."
"Raven, listen to me," Father James pleads. "Teddy's in over his head. There are forces at work here that he can't control."
"I know, Father. I'm praying to forgive him, but it's hard."
"Sometimes, the people we love make mistakes," Father James says gently. "But that doesn't mean they don't love us."
"Love?" I ask, my voice hollow. "What does love have to do with any of this?"
"Everything, Raven," he replies softly. "Love can save us from our darkest moments. But it can also blind us to the truth."
"Maybe you're right," I admit, wiping away my tears. "But what am I supposed to do now? How do I break free from this cage, both literally and figuratively?"
"Have faith, Raven," Father James says, reaching through the bars to touch my hand reassuringly. "In yourself, in Teddy, and in the power of love to heal even the deepest wounds."
As he turns to leave, I try and find a flicker of hope in my heart, but I can't seem to find it. As I'm closed into the darkness once more, I know that Father James means well, but there's no returning to the life I once had with Teddy.
* * *
Carmine's slicked-back hair glistens under the dim light as he paces back and forth, his voice a constant drone in my ear. "The Irish aren't to be underestimated, Teddy. We need to be prepared, we need to—"
