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While the pain of everything still burns within me, I almost feel cushioned from it thanks to Atlas’s presence. Syn still plays on my mind, and my heart is screaming out for him, but I know I’d be useless to him right now. Seeing me like this would only hurt him and make his madness worse. As soon as I’m stable, I’m going to track him down—I don’t care what the queen says.
We’re silent for some time, my breathing and heart rate finally settling to a regular rhythm, with his gentle hand soothing over my back. I’m not used to him being like this with me. He’s comforted me before, but it’s always been in a more aggressive way. Something about seeing me completely breakdown seems to have changed his mannerisms towards me.
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I finally ask, my quiet voice croaking. I know he decided to stop denying our bond, but he’s actually acting like a mate, with kindness and compassion.
The hand on my back slows to a stop, and his chest rises and falls as he sighs. There’s a pause, and I wonder if he’s going to answer me at all when he clears his throat. “I saw the madness in that wolf’s eyes, and I thought I was about to lose you. Again.”
His answer surprises me. I expected him to brush me off, but instead, he’s giving me a real, honest answer. I don’t move as he speaks, simply staying pressed against him and absorbing his warmth as I wait for him to continue, not wanting to disturb him in case it causes him to stop. Getting Atlas to confess his feelings is no easy feat.
“I won’t deny that this is hard for me, especially with another of your mates being here… but seeing you breaking down, it was like I was losing part of my soul.” The pain in his voice is raw. His hands move up and rest on my shoulders, pushing me back until he can see my face. His eyes shimmer with emotion as my lilac orbs meet his silver ones. “You don’t have to carry the burden of all this alone. Let me help you.”
I want to believe him, but something is stopping me. Taking a deep breath, I shake my head as I remember our interaction with the queen only hours ago.
“You thought I lied and schemed to get myself a ticket out of Haven. You thought I was using you.” I’m sure my face shows the pain I felt at the betrayal of his feelings. My eyes sting, but I don’t allow any more tears to fall. Instead, I channel my emotions into anger. “You’ve felt how I feel, I know you can through the bond. Do you really think I’d just run off like that without you?”
A frown takes over his face. “What are you talking about?”
He seems genuinely confused, but I know what I felt. I place a hand against his chest to stop myself from sinking back into his embrace.
“When the queen’s witch confirmed that I was telling the truth about not knowing Syn was coming for me,” I say, the accusation clear in my voice, “I felt your relief through the bond. Don’t bother trying to deny it!”
It takes him a moment to work out what I’m saying, but when he does, understanding flashes across his face. His frown melts away, and the smallest smile pulls at his lips.
“I was relieved,” he starts, catching my chin as I begin to pull away, the cold touch of his magic kissing my skin. It’s not enough to hurt me, but enough to stop me in my tracks and remind me who he is. “Iwasrelieved, but not because I thought you used me.” Raising a dark brow, he looks at me with an intense expression, any hints of humour gone. “When Ivar confirmed you were telling the truth, it saved your life. If the queen suspected you arranged this and somehow led a wolf to Haven, she would have had you killed.” Huffing out a humourless laugh, he shakes his head, his eyes darkening. “She needs you, but she needs the safety and support of her people more.”
The weight of his words hits me, and I realise he’s right. If the queen didn’t have the support of her people, then having me here would only make that worse. If they demanded my death because I put them at risk by leading a wolf here, there wouldn’t be much the queen could do about it.
He didn’t doubt me, he just didn’t know if Ivar would confirm that I was telling the truth. It seems I’m not the only one who isn’t sure about Ivar. Emotion swells in my chest, and I open my mouth to speak, but my keen werewolf hearing picks up the sound of several pairs of feet moving across the marble. They’ve not reached my room yet, but they are close.
“I swear, if you keep me from my mate for one moment longer, I’m going to start tearing out throats, and I don’t care that I don’t have fangs anymore. My human teeth will do just fine,” Nicolai threatens, his voice echoing down the hall, full of frustration and need. Nicolai has always been like the cheeky boy next door, gorgeous and there for you whenever you needed him, but something about his transformation and becoming my mate has awoken a more protective, vicious side in him.
Protector, my inner wolf whispers in my mind, the new behaviour pleasing her.
My bond does somersaults in my chest at having one of my mates so close, and I sit upright, straining to get a glimpse of him. It’s only the slight tightening of Atlas’s arms around me that stops me from jumping up.
“The guards are wary of you. They’ve never met someone like you,” a smooth voice responds. My brows rise as I recognise it as belonging to Ivar. He brought my mate to me.
My heart leaps as a familiar figure rounds the corner.
“Nicolai.” Relief floods me so hard that tears threaten to fall once more, but he’s already moving towards me, his own relief evident.
Very aware of Atlas’s presence behind me, I eagerly push up onto my knees to greet Nicolai, but I don’t leave the cocoon that my witch created for me, still kneeling between his legs which are stretched out on either side of me. Climbing up onto the mattress, and also positioning himself within the wall of Atlas’s legs, Nicolai pulls me against him, encompassing me within his arms.
A strange, animalistic moan escapes my throat as I wrap my arms around him, pressing myself as close as I can. Burying my face against his chest, I grip onto his shirt for dear life, like he might disappear if I were to let go. Having him here helps ground me. He’s someone safe, someone from home that I know will always have my back. As if sensing my thoughts and wanting to remind me of his newfound dedication, Atlas brushes my lower back with his hand. I hadn’t realised just how fractured I was, but with the two of them touching me like this, it helps to strengthen and pull me back together again.
A low cough cuts through the moment, and I reluctantly pull back and look over Nicolai’s shoulder to Ivar, who stands in the doorway. “I thought you might need some backup.” His black eyes glisten with an emotion I can’t decipher, and the smile he gives me is still creepy, but he didn’t have to bring Nicolai here, so even though it’s shaky, my smile is genuine.
“Thank you.”
He looks taken aback by the warmth and sincerity in my voice, blinking at me as if I just spoke in a different language. The queen doesn’t strike me as someone who vocalises her gratitude, if she even feels it at all. The surprise slowly leaves his face, replaced with the smallest smile as he dips his head in respect. Without a sound, he backs from the room, taking the shadows that had been clouding the room with him. I hadn’t even noticed them until now, and with them gone, the atmosphere feels lighter. Neither of the males on the bed seem to notice anything, but before I can speak, Nicolai cups my cheeks and stares down at me.
“Are you okay?” he asks, scanning my face for any trace of injury. “I was going mad in that room they locked me in. I could feel your pain and fear, but I couldn’t do anything about it.” He pulls back and examines me, stiffening as he sees the blood on my clothes. “You’re hurt?”
Shaking my head, I grab his hand, needing his attention. “It’s not my blood. It’s Syn, he’s here.”
The shock that I was expecting doesn’t show on his face, and instead, a grim expression greets me. “I know. That creepy witch filled me in on the way up.” Shuddering at the mention of Ivar, he takes a deep breath to refocus himself. “Syn was injured?”
I nod, my eyes stinging. “He looked like he was turning feral.”
