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Clenching down on his dick, I pulse around Nicolai as waves of pleasure wash over me. Just as I think it’s starting to ebb, Nicolai lets out a croaked cry, his movements stalling as he pumps his cum inside me. This only extends my pleasure as we fall apart around each other.
Slumped over my back, Nicolai stirs, wading through his pleasure fogged mind as he slowly removes his cock. He hums with approval, and I feel his fingers at my entrance, gently pushing his cum back inside me. There is no possible way I could go again, but that doesn’t stop my core from clenching at the action.
My pussy is so sensitive now, throbbing from the attention it’s received, and I know I’ll feel this little session in the morning. Right now, though, I feel like I’m floating, my limbs light. Lifting my head, I see Scott leaning back in bliss, the evidence of his enjoyment clear to see.
Exhaustion floods me, but it’s different from how I felt earlier. That was a bone weary exhaustion that follows both physical and mental exhaustion, overwhelming and consuming me completely. This is like a warm, sleepy hug of a loved one, my eyes heavy as my body hums from pleasure. However, I’m very aware of the fact I’ve not spent much time with Atlas.
He hasn’t come yet. In fact, I’ve hardly touched him, and leaning against him like a chair doesn’t count. When I turn to him, I find him watching me with a pleased, sleepy smile. It doesn’t take me long to figure out why. His semi-hard cock is still in his hand, his cum coating his stomach. It seems Atlas took his pleasure into his own hands.
Knees quivering, I sit down on the edge of the bed with slightly more force than I planned, my balance thrown. A blissful smile plays on my lips, and I have no words for how I’m feeling.
Thankfully, Joel senses what I need before I even work it out for myself and approaches me with a gentle expression. “Come, mate. Let’s get you cleaned up,” he murmurs quietly, picking me up and cradling me in his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of my head. It’s such a caring gesture and so much like my big alpha mate that I don’t insist on walking to the bathroom myself. Instead, I lean against him and let him care for me.
ChapterEleven
In the morning, I feel surprisingly well. The aches and bruises from the day before are healed, and that bone deep exhaustion seems to have passed. What really shocks me, though, is how clear my mind is. After yesterday’s challenge and the mess the arch left me in, I wasn’t expecting to feel like myself for a long time.
Sure, I’m still questioning a lot of what I learned about myself. I’m not certain anyone could ever be completely whole again after they see all of their mistakes and flaws displayed like that. The wounds it created were on a soul deep level and were too large to heal overnight. I might never be the same as I was before, but I can grow to be okay with that.
I survived, though, and last night with my mates helped heal my state of mind as well as my body, something I didn’t know was possible. I’m so blessed with them in my life. Other than the obvious healing benefits, it was the hottest night of my life. They all worked together to care for me and bring me pleasure, even involving Scott in a way they never would have before.
Untangling myself from the mass of limbs on the bed, I smile as I slip away, padding over to the bathroom. Once I’ve used the toilet and wash my hands in the sink, I glance up at my reflection in the mirror. I look different, older, wiser perhaps, but I see the effects of my mates’ love on my face. My lilac eyes are brighter and shine with an inner strength I didn’t have before. My skin almost glows with health, and I seem to carry an air of contentment that can only come with a relationship you have fully committed to.
Hope blooms in my chest as I think back to last night. If we survive this, then we could actually be happy together. However, that will never happen while we’re being held hostage in Haven. Sure, we’ve been given all the comforts we could need, but a gilded cage is still a cage. If we tried to walk out, we would be stopped, and now we’re being forced to perform in this game the queen concocted for her own reasons.
Determination fills me. I will carve a life for us, no matter the cost or what the world has planned for us. We will eventually leave Haven and live peacefully. I will find my pack, make sure they are all safe, and be reunited with my father. We can all live peacefully. Is it naïve to believe that’s possible? Maybe. However, it gives me strength to push forward and survive these challenges.
Smiling at myself in the mirror, I send the goddess a quick prayer of thanks and return to the bedroom. Three of my males are spread across the bed, their arms and legs hanging over the edge of the mattress. I smile and shake my head. Syn, Joel, and Scott are all still fast asleep, and I’m about to join them when I hear a quiet conversation coming from the sitting room.
Usually, I would just pass by, not stopping to listen in on something that’s obviously private, but something in my gut tells me this is important. Frowning, I slow to a stop by the slightly ajar door.
Nicolai’s strained voice reaches me, my heart clenching tightly in my chest as I hear his distress. Instinctively, I start to move forward to comfort him, but I force myself to stop. If he wanted my comfort, he would have asked for it, so although it stings, I respect his choice—even if I am breaking his obvious wish for privacy by listening in.
“I just need you to take it away,” Nicolai states, his voice strained. “You did it before, I don’t understand the problem.”
My frown deepens with confusion as I puzzle over what he’s speaking about.
Atlas sighs, confirming my assumption that’s who Nicolai is speaking to. His response is instant, like none of this is new information and they are repeating something they’ve already discussed. “You sent some of your power to me when I was using vast quantities of my own and needed more. I didn’t take your magic away,” he explains, making sure he’s precise in his explanation so Nicolai understands what he’s trying to convey. “When you use a lot of magic, it takes a while to build back up in your body. That’s why you haven’t felt the need to use your magic until now. You used it all, and now it’s returning.”
My eyes slide shut as understanding hits me with anguish. Tears prick at my eyes as I bite down on my lip to stop any sound from escaping. Nicolai is struggling with his magic. I knew that he was fighting for control when we discovered his power, but since the challenge, he’s been lighter, almost like the old Nicolai. Shame surges through me like a swollen river after a torrential downpour, making it difficult to control or tame. In the stress of everything that’s happened, I’d practically forgotten about the struggle Nicolai has been experiencing.
“I don’t want it to build up. I just want it gone! I canfeelit moving through me.” His anguish is plain to hear in his voice as he gets louder, not caring who overhears him at this point. He’s desperate. “Please, just take it.”
Placing my hand against the door, I attempt to soothe him through our connection. I feel his heartache and desperation through the bond, and it’s agony. The desire to do something,anything, that will help him is so strong that it fills me with sorrow. There is nothing I can do to take away his magic, nor can I seem to banish my guilt, knowing that he’s in this situation because he wanted to be with me.
There’s a heavy pause, and eventually, Atlas huffs out a breath. Whether this means he’s considering the other male’s request or how to reject it without sending him into a spiral, I don’t know. If I could see him, see their expressions, then I could possibly help. Unable to hold myself back any longer, I push the door open and step into the sitting room.
Both of them look over at me, and while Atlas doesn’t look surprised to see me, Nicolai appears panicked. The former is wearing a pair of low slung grey sweatpants, and his arms are crossed over his bare chest, his expression frustrated. I can feel that he’s torn, wanting to help my other mate but not knowing how. My gaze quickly flicks over to Nicolai, taking in his ragged appearance. Loose trousers and an oversized shirt cover his body, but his hair is sticking up at all angles as though he’s been repeatedly combing his fingers through it.
“Nicolai? Atlas? Is everything okay?”
I heard enough of their conversation to know that it’s not okay, but I don’t want Nicolai to feel uncomfortable. Besides, I want him to tell me what’s happening. I want him to trust me with his struggle.
Smiling tightly in a way I’m sure he thinks is reassuring, he waves me off with a flick of his hand. “We’re fine. You should get some more sleep.”
“No.” Atlas reaches out as if gesturing for me to stay, yet his eyes are locked on Nicolai. “We arenotfine.” Tone firm, he faces off with the other male before slowly turning to address me. “Nicolai is struggling with his magic, but he doesn’t want to learn to control it. He wants me to syphon off some of his magic to make it easier to keep under control.”
My eyebrows rise. “I didn’t know you could do that.”
