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When we sat on the blanket, I laid on my back, resting my head on his lap. He smiled down at me and traced my eyebrow with his thumb.
“I’m glad we came out here today,” I said, reaching for his hand. His fingers slid between mine and I guided his hand to my heart. “Can you feel that? It’s beating like crazy. I had a bad feeling about today, but it’s been perfect. Because I’m here with you.” I grabbed the wine bottle and took another swig.
“I’m glad we came, too. There’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about,” he said.
“Do you think maybe we can come back on Saturday? You’re off this weekend. I can see if Rhonda will cover my shift. I’ve just been missing you, you know?”
“I’ve been with you at work every day.”
I shook my head. “Not like before. I haven’t talked to you in two weeks. Not really.” I took another swig of wine and let out a belch that I was in no way proud of. Gray reared his head back and cackled. “We don’t go quiet on each other. Not anymore, okay? If you’re mad at me, you have to talk to me about it. Get that shit out in the open so we can move past it.”
“Sorry,” he said. His jaw went slack, and he reached for me, stroking my chin. “Really, I am. I’ve had a lot of stuff on my plate. I know it’s no excuse, but I didn’t mean to hurt you. I never want to hurt you.” He sniffed, turning his head toward the water. “I’d never set out to do anything to hurt you. Not on purpose. You know that, right?”
I reached up, bumping the tip of his nose with my finger. “Well, today’s your lucky day. There’s a very simple solution to that: just don’t hurt me.” I closed my eyes, taking in the scent of the water, the sound of leaves dancing on the wind, and the warmth of the sun shining on my skin. “I’m never as happy as I am when we’re here. It’s like we can be anyone we want to be, you know? We always could.” I stretched my arms above my head, looped my arms around his waist, and I ran my hands up and down his back. “You think one day we could get a place out here? Have one built, maybe? And then we could just always be us.” I pointed at a clearing past the oak tree. “Right there. We could build it ourselves.” I paused, thinking of the logistics of it all. The buzz I had from the wine made everything feel possible. Had the logs been in front of me, I would have started construction right then. “I don’t really know exactly how one constructs a house, but it would be fun to learn. And we could get us a dog. Maybe another beagle? That would be perfect, don’t you think?”
“Are you drunk right now?” He traced my eyebrow again, and a smile coated with sadness peppered his face.
“I may have partaken in a bit of lakeside revelry, yes, but that’s not the point.”
“It’s absolutely the point. You’re drunk and talking about building a dang cabin, Kent. You’re not making any sense. Besides,” Gray said. “I’ve already got a dog.”
I cocked my head to the side and stared at him. “Since when?”
Gray darted his eyes away and stared out at the lake. “Got him a few months back. But, like I was saying—”
“I think you would have told me if you’d gotten a dog. I’m calling bullshit on this one.” I reached up and thumped his nose. “There’s something you’re not telling me. I’ll get it out of you one day, but today is not that day.” I lifted my hands over my head and stretched, yawning obnoxiously, right at him. “You like the idea, don’t you? Me and you. It’ll be me and you, and this mystery dog of yours. Just how it’s supposed to be.” Everything about the moment felt right. I was cuddled up against my favorite person in the world, drunk on half a bottle of wine, and the world felt alight with possibility. “Me and you, forever. You know?”
His throat clicked. “We’ve talked about this.”
“Building a cabin?” I tilted my head to the side, racking my brain for a memory of this. Any memory of this. “Have we really? Was I sober? Because I don’t remember a lot of the stuff that happens when I’m sober. I’m much more on my game when I’m under the influence.”
“Dammit, Kent. Just shut up for a second, will you?”
I sat up and whirled around on my ass, glaring at him like he’d just punched me in the face. “Well, that was rude. And don’t swear. It’s like hearing a nun telling someone to go fuck themselves. You’re too precious to dirty your tongue.” I waggled my eyebrows at him. “With words, at least.”
“That’s not the damn—” he sighed. “That’s not the dang point. I need to tell you something. That’s why I brought you out here today.” He fixed his gaze on the lake as if it held the last of his courage. “There’s something I need to show you, and I need you to stay calm when I pull it out.”
“Sounds kind of tawdry, if you ask me.” I reached down, sliding my finger into the waistband of his drenched boxer briefs, letting his pubes twirl around my finger. Gray slapped my hand away from his groin and rolled his eyes. He reached forward, grabbing his bag; his beautiful, frustrated face glowing under the golden sun. When I saw what it was—when I witnessed that small, red box in his hand—I shivered. The temperature was in the lower nineties, but I felt frozen.
“Kent?”
I cocked my head to the side, genuinely confused by the turn of events.
A ring. He was giving me a ring.
“Gray, are you proposing to me? Because we haven’t even kissed since I got back.”
“What?” The color drained from his face, and I watched as his Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat.
Looking down at the opened box, I drunkenly deliberated. Yes, this was quite a massive step, and it seemed terribly rushed, but this was Gray.My Gray.Because that’s who he was, wasn’t he? Who he always had been.
“This is fast, even by my standards.”
“I’m not—”
I placed my finger over his lips. “Hush now. My turn to talk. It’s not that I’m entirely opposed to the idea, but you’ve gotta learn to pace yourself. You can’t just hurl out a wedding proposal willy-nilly like that. I’m a classy kind of guy.”
He pulled away from my hand and stared at me. “A classy kind of guy? I’ve seen you feed yourself tuna out of a bowl with your finger.”
