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Marty stared at me, a smile curling up in the corners of his mouth. “And this will make you happy?”
“Nothing makes me happier than him.”
He nodded. “Then I support it.” He leaned forward, kissing Gray’s forehead. It was my turn next, as a set of damp lips planted themselves against my temple.
“Daddy,” Gray choked out, pressing his face into Marty’s chest.
Esther stood by the sink and sobbed. Tiny little whimpers. Small, sad sounds that pulled at my heartstrings. Like a mouse stuck in a glue trap. And just like those mice, I couldn’t stand to see her suffer. I opened my mouth in an attempt at offering an olive branch. Trying to bridge the gap she’d created between us all those years ago. Before I could get the words out, Esther’s voice called out from the other side of the kitchen.
“It’s sick. This is sick.”
“You’re sick. What you did to him was sick,” Gray hissed at her.
“He wasn’t ever in any danger. Trevor wasn’t going to hurt him. I just asked him to scare him a little. I had to protect you. To keep you right with God.”
Gray’s hands were shaking. Although I couldn’t see his expression, judging by the look on her face, I’d wager it wasn’t pleasant. “You cost me years with him. Years I can’t ever get back. I don’t know if we can come back from this.”
“There’s no reason to be dramatic,” she scoffed, still staring at me like I was Satan incarnate, coming to claim her son and drag him down into the pits of Hell.
“I’m gay, Momma. I’m gay, and you trying to force me to marry a woman isn’t going to change that. Pretending I’m straight isn’t going to change it.” Gray brought my hand to his mouth and kissed it. “I’ve loved him all this time. All of it. I’m not losing him again.” He turned back to me and forced a smile. “Let’s go home.”
“Home?”
“It can be. If you want it.”
I pressed my lips to his ears, bringing my voice to a whisper. “We’ve been dating for two weeks. I’m not going to turn you down in front of her because, honestly? This little power-play of yours is doing things to me right now, but we’re going to need to have a long, serious discussion about this before any suitcases are involved.” Gray whimpered in my ear and his hand tightened around mine. “God, I love you.”
“You know how much God means to him, Kent. You’re taking that away from him. If you let him do this, you’re ripping that out of his life.”
“Esther!” Martin shouted. “That’s enough. He’s our son, and he needs us. You can either be happy for them or you can keep that bigotry to yourself. I won’t stand for it.”
“You know this is wrong,” Esther said, though I wasn’t sure which of us she was addressing.
“If something as silly as loving another man is enough for God to abandon him,” I said. “Then I’ll be his God. And he can be mine.” Gray pulled me from the room, mumbling under his breath. “You’re going to have to speak up. I can’t understand a word you’re saying.”
Once outside, his neck recoiled into his shoulders and he began looking up, left and right, all across the sky. Once he realized no lightning bolts were coming for him, he turned toward me. “That’s about the most sacrilegious thing I’ve ever heard in my life. As romantic as it was, never say that again.”
I looped my arms around his neck and kissed his forehead. “You are, though. To me.”
Gray blushed, and I could see how hard he was trying to keep the smile off his face. “Stop that.”
“My beautiful, gorgeous little God.” My teeth nipped at his earlobe. “And I am going to praise your name for the rest of my life.”
“Oh my gosh, Kent. You can’t just say stuff like that.”
“I’ll miss you, you know? When you’re living it up on that cloud and I’m wandering around a blackened abyss of nothingness. Come visit me from time to time.”
REASON FIFTEEN
You have no idea what you do to me, Kent Fox.
Thethirdofficialmeetingof the Unofficial Leah Grant-Carter fan club came to a close at three P.M. on October thirtieth. After a two-hour tirade about the dangers of Halloween andthe spirit worlddelivered by Myrna Thorpe, the rest of the group went out for a late lunch, giving Gray and myself some much-needed alone time. As Gray tidied up, I took a shower to wash away the remnants of Rhonda’sWorld-Famous Pork ‘n Beansshe’d dumped on my lap when I pointed out that her world-famous dish had simply been a can of Bush’s Baked Beans she’d microwaved on high for two minutes.
I was stepping into a pair of white boxer briefs when he knocked on my door.
“Come in.” I had my underwear halfway up my thighs when he entered, and for the first time in twenty years, Gray Collins saw my bare ass.
“Oh my gosh,” he whispered, his hand welded to the door. It took me a second to realize what had him so startled. I must have still been reeling from the fact that I’d been assaulted by a bowl of baked beans less than an hour prior. Being scantily clad in front of Gray didn’t even register.
