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Their absence wreaked havoc on my heart and mind for years. While my thoughts are lost in limbo, I don’t notice at first when my son crawls into my lap and wipes the fallen tears.
He lays his head on my shoulder. "It's okay, Mom. I love you," he repeats in a whisper.
I hug him tight against me. "I love you too, monster."
* * *
After the trip to the ice cream shop, Shaun and I came home and made his second favorite dinner—macaroni cheese with hot dogs—and I read him his favorite book before tucking him into bed.
I strut into my room to see Maverick's present, chilling' on my bed. Maybe I totally forgot about it, or maybe I just didn't want to think about it. I give the gift the cold shoulder while I head to the bathroom to freshen up. After scrubbing my face and my teeth, I flick off the light, hoping that maybe, just maybe, that present will magically poof away. But no such luck. So, instead of fighting against it, I turn the light back on,
I notice a card on top of the gift. Taking a risk, I grab the card and open it.
Scar, I missed five years of your birthday. This is your third gift. Number four is…well, you'll know when you see it. Happy birthday, Tinkerbelle. -Ricky
Unwrapping the gift, I gasp. I pull out a frosted jar filled with fairy lights and a fairy in the middle and a ring pop and cry.
Flashback, Scarlet, age 14
Ihad always been fascinated by art. I loved the way colors could be blended to create something beautiful.
I spent hours drawing in my sketchbook, deciding what to paint. I wanted something bold and colorful that would make me happy every time I walked into my bedroom.
Finally, I settled on a design: the lantern with twinkling fairy lights—a gift from Ricky. I had always loved the way fairy lights shone in the dark. The lantern was a beautiful shade of bronze, with mazelike patterns etched into the metal. The fairy lights inside were a warm, golden hue, casting a comforting glow that filled the entire room.
My peaceful thoughts were rudely interrupted by my half-sister. Skylar had been yelling at me for the past hour, or at least it seemed that way. She'd been yapping something about Ricky belonging to her, and that I should stop being a psycho stalker, blah, blah, blah. First of all, Ricky didn’t belong to anyone but himself. Secondly, I was not a stalker. He sought me out. And thirdly, blah, blah, blah.
"Are you even listening to me?"
No.
God, she was so annoying.
"Scar!" she yelled.
"What!?" I yelled back.
"Don't yell at me," she countered, eyes flashing with anger.
“Then don’t yell at me. Seriously, why are you even in my room?” I turned my back to the Tinkerbell mural I had been working on for days, hoping she would take the hint and get the fuck out of my safe place.
"I don't want you talking to Mav anymore. He has better things to do than spend time with you. You do realize he's way older than you, right?"
Of course I knew that. Nothing could ever happen between us. He was Seth’s best friend, and my best friend.
"Yeah, I can do the math, Skylar." I rolled my eyes.
"Then why in the hell does he keep giving you little gifts?"
"I don't know. Ask him." I continued to paint, trying to ignore her little tantrum.
"Did he give you this?" I turned around, curious as to what she was referring to when she held up my gift from Ricky—the fairy lantern. It was one of my favorite birthday gifts that I had ever received. It reminded me of the nights he helped keep my demon locked away, and those nights meant something special to me. No one would ever understand what he did, which kept me sane and gave me a sense of normalcy.
The sound of glass shattering froze me in place as I watched my sister throw it on the floor, breaking into a million pieces.
"Why would you do that?" I cried out, trying not to hyperventilate. Tears built up behind my eyes, ready to fall.
"Oops," she said mockingly, covering her mouth.
