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“Oh, now you want to talk? After yelling and scaring the crap out of me? Well, it’s too late.” I put my hand on his chin and pushed his face away.
“I said I’m sorry.”
“So am I. Now get off me!” I screeched and flailed my legs and arms to no avail. He had me pinned under him.
“Jesus Christ, Ella. I can’t lose you. I’ll be worthless. Miserable.” His words made me freeze, and my fight instantly deflated.
“I won’t let you talk to me like that, Rocky. I don’t even know what the hell happened.”
“I know, baby. It’s me. All me. I fucked up, and it won’t happen again.”
“I was with you because I wanted to be.”
“Was?”
“You just told me to run for my life. Do you think that makes me want to be with you?”
“I don’t know why I said that.” He lowered his chin to his chest, and the pained expression he’d had minutes ago returned.
“Because you’re an asshole who wanted to scare me. And it worked!” I shoved his arm, but he wouldn’t budge.
“I don’t want you to be afraid of me, Ella. I would never hurt you.”
“How am I supposed to know that? You hardly talk about yourself. You haven’t told me anything about you, your parents, or your club.” It finally felt like we were getting somewhere. I might be learning more about Rocky in the last few seconds than in the previous month.
“You’re right, baby. I should open up to you, and I will. Just don’t leave.” He kissed me softly. “Don’t go. Stay because you want to, because you want to be with me. I sure as fuck want to be with you.”
“What are we, Rocky? Am I your good-time girl or something more? You’ve never labeled us.” In my mind, we were a couple after Rocky had told me I was his. But the kids at school would’ve called it “talking” until he declared us boyfriend and girlfriend.
“You’re my girlfriend… If you want?”
Finally, he’d said the word I longed to hear:girlfriend. “I want to be yours, but only if you’re mine and because you want me.”
He exhaled a labored breath. “Yes, baby.” He kissed me fervently. “Yes to everything. I want you, Ellassandra.”
We kissed there on the ground for a while. Rocky grew hard and rubbed his erection against my pelvis. My fear faded, and desire ignited in my core.
“We should return to the clubhouse before I deflower you in the dirt.”
I snorted. “Funny thing. I want you to dirty me up.”
“Oh, don’t worry, baby. I will.” He winked, climbing off me and extending his hand to help me stand. We laced our fingers together and strolled back to the clubhouse in comfortable silence.
This time, Rocky didn’t ask if I was ready. He opened the door and waved me to enter. My eyes went as big and round as an owl’s.
Men in leather cuts were everywhere. Topless women joined them.
Johnny Cash’s “God’s Gonna Cut You Down” played. Ironically, my dad loved Johnny.
The room smelled of beer, tobacco, and marijuana.
A guy hammered into the backside of a naked woman against the wall to my right. On my left, another couple was screwing on a pool table.
“Close your mouth, beautiful.” Rocky put his arm around me and pulled me in close… protectively. “Someone might ask you for a blowjob,” he whispered into my ear. “Then I’d go on a killing rampage.”
I snapped my mouth shut, wholly shocked by his comment. Would he actually murder a member of his club if they touched me?
Could I be in over my head with Rocky?
