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With a shrug, he replied, “He had a point though.”
“Excuse me?”
“Your time is off, man. There’s no way around that.”
“I can make it up before qualifiers,” I replied. The truth was I had said it more for me than him. When Kevin didn’t reply, I repeated, “I can make it up. I was up a few seconds before I went to Mexico.”
He swept his hands to his hips. “I don’t know, man.”
“Not you too,” I grunted.
“I’m just worried for you.”
“Don’t be. I’ll be fine.”
Pinning me with a hard look, Kevin said, “With your lagging time, maybe it’s time to cut things off with Gaby.”
My eyes bulged at his remark. “You’re full of shit.”
“I’m serious.”
“How can you possibly say that?”
“Because now is not the time to lose your focus. You and I both are cutting it close at our ages. We’re not one of the greats who can still pull this shit off in our thirties.” He shook his head. “This is probably our last shot at another games.”
His words, coupled with the cold, sent a shiver through me. Putting on a brave face, I argued, “I’m not breaking things off with Gaby. Jesus, I just flew thousands of miles to get her back five weeks ago.”
“Fine. The least you should do is cool things off a bit. Get your focus off Gaby and back on swimming until the first qualifiers are over. Then you can go back to being Mr. Romance.”
I shook my head. “You don’t get it. I swore to her I would always put her first.”
Kevin stared wide-eyed at me. “While I’m not a fan of pussy, she must have an amazing one for you to do that.”
Gritting my teeth, I challenged, “Don’t talk about her like that.”
He jabbed a finger at me. “See, that right there tells me your head is completely fucked where this girl is concerned. Never before have you ever gotten heated over a girl.”
“I love her.”
“And that’s fine. You can love her and love swimming too, right?”
I wanted to say yes. I wanted more than anything to be able to find a happy medium. But at this moment, I knew I had no clue how to do that. I didn’t have experience at juggling the two things, and for the first time, I was questioning whether this was something I would fail at. I had to find that happy medium where both my heart and my love were happy, and I wasn’t going to lose a spot on the team.
Rubbing my hand over my face, I sighed in defeat. “Fine. I’ll go back in and swim another half hour. And I’ll make up even more time for Coach.”
Kevin grinned. “That sounds like the old Fitzy.”
As I followed him back into the complex, I pulled my phone out of my hoodie. With an ache in my chest, I texted Gaby.
Something has come up. Rain check for our Facetime?
Since she was expecting my call soon, it didn’t take her too long to reply.
Gaby:Sure. Take care, and I miss you.
I miss you more.
With a resigned sigh and feeling like an utter bastard, I tore my hoodie over my head and trudged back over to the pool. My muscles would scream at me tomorrow for not cooling down properly and then re-entering the pool, but fuck, there was nothing I could do about it.
