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Wrapping my hands around my hot chocolate, I settled back myself, ready to relax. “Yeah, I hear you. It's hard to notice what our bodies need when life throws a monkey wrench in our plans. Tonight had to be stressful for you.”
He finished chewing a piece of apple and said, “I mean, it was, but my little girl hasn't run the best in winter for the last couple of years. Generally, I'd just call for a rideshare and go back and try to start her up tomorrow, but my friends made me promise that I’d let them know if I had any problems tonight. Since I knew they were all actually busy, I figured calling Levi and Christian would pacify them.”
Chuckling, I nodded. “Yes, Indy, Chip, and Julian have become your little crew, haven't they? Not sure I’d take them on, either.”
A smile flitted across his face, and I wondered if he'd even realized it. “They have. It's nice having someone worry about me, though.”
I wasn’t sure if he meant that as a throwaway comment, but it filled me with concern. I'd always assumed that Luca didn't hang out with the other servers at The Tap because he had an active social life at school. Or maybe someone special that he didn’t get enough time with between school and work that he spent his free time with them. Until lately, when I'd seen with my own two eyes and heard from the other Daddies that he was with those three boys more and more, it hadn't ever occurred to me that he was doing this life on his own. “So do your parents not live close?”
Luca blew out a breath. “No, they don't, but it wouldn't matter if they did.”
“Pardon me if I’m overstepping, but why is that?”
“My sister's husband is a complete and total homophobe. She's ten years older than me, and she met him in college. They got married immediately after graduating when I was fifteen. I never got the feeling he liked me too much, and at a family dinner, I found out why.”
He paused, so I asked, “Why?” softly.
“While my mom’s asking my sister to pass the peas, my brother-in-law asked me if I was gay.” Doing jazz hands, he said, “Surprise, I am.” He picked up his hot chocolate, and I gave him a minute to collect his thoughts. “I hadn’t really planned to tell my family my truth yet, but I also wasn’t going to lie about it once he put it out there.”
My heart hurt for him. I understood the pain from the loss of family members who were still alive and breathing. “So that's how you came out to your family?”
“Yep. It didn't go over well with my father, so he and my brother-in-law became best buddies, and I became the pariah that only my mother spoke to.”
“Damn, that sucks. What about your sister?”
He blew out a breath. “I think she’d have been cool with it if she hadn’t still been so starry-eyed over her new husband. In fact, I’d almost told her a couple of times because I thought she’d be supportive.”
“But your mom is supportive?”
Luca wrinkled his nose. “I wouldn’t say that, but I’m her kid, and she loves me. I even think she’d come to see me more if she didn’t watch my sister’s children while they work. It makes it hard. She doesn’t want to shirk her obligations to them, and since we all know how my brother-in-law would take her blowing off her responsibilities to them for me…” He shrugged. “It’s kind of a lose-lose situation.”
He sounded so young and vulnerable. He was also obviously uncomfortable. I much preferred him talking and treating me like a halfway likable person than hating me, and I didn’t want that to change. For that to happen, I needed to share a little, too. “Families suck sometimes. My parents were…unstable, to say the least.”
“In what way?” he asked.
“In all ways.” Leaning my head back, I let my mind wander through the past. “I can't remember a time in my parents’ house when things didn't feel out of control and chaotic. One minute, they were all lovey-dovey, and that should have been great, right?” He nodded. “Except those were the times that they forgot I even existed. A child? A son who needs to be fed, clothed, has school functions, or doctors appointments? No way. We're in love and want to spend every minute of our time together.”
“And the rest of the time?”
“The rest of the time, I became the center of one of their worlds. Which meant, lucky me, they smothered me with attention while trying to make the other one jealous. Also, it's tons of fun listening to your parents rage at you about the other one's infidelity.”
Luca gasped. “They talked to you about those kinds of issues? Even as a kid?”
“Oh yeah. See, here's the thing, I'm not sure that either one of them ever stepped out on the other, but all it took was a friendly waitress when they went out to dinner or some random man smiling in their direction when they were out shopping, and the green-eyed, jealous monster came out to play. They would tell you it's because they were so in love, but it was really more of an obsession. There was nothing healthy about their relationship.”
Luca set his mug back on the tray and turned, crossing his legs on the couch and leaning on his elbows toward me. “Do you still have contact with them?”
“No, not at all. I'm not even sure my aunt—my mom's sister—does. Like you, my parents didn't handle my coming out well.”
“What happened?” he asked softly. “You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but I’ll admit, I’m curious.”
Turning toward him, I pulled my leg up on the couch to where our knees almost touched. “It's not a story I share often since I don't really like to think about them, but I don't mind telling you. Fall break of my freshman year of college, I went home and told them I was gay. I figured they needed to know, since I'd met this guy I was pretty into.”
“They threw you out,” he guessed.
I laughed wryly. “No, they acted like it was no big deal and went on with life. I headed back to school thinking everything was fine. A few days before Christmas break, I got a text from my mother saying that they were having a hard time wrapping their heads around my announcement, so maybe it would be best if I didn't come home for the holiday.”
“Oh shit. Were you living on campus at the time?” he asked.
