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I laugh like it’s funny when it’s really not, and judging by Jonesy’s wince, he doesn’t think so either.It also reminds me that I completely cut him off earlier.“Sorry, you were going to tell me something before, and I interrupted you.What’s up?”
He steps all the way away, leaving me cold.
“You know what, it doesn’t matter.”He shoves his hands in his pockets and hunches his shoulders.“I’m sorry about the Boston job.And Canada.And your former friend.”
“Already forgotten.”Even though I give a toss-away flick of my hand like I’m throwing out the bad news, my stomach still churns from the rejection.“I mean, who wants to live in Massachusetts anyway?Not me.”And as the words come out of my mouth, I realize it’s actually kind of true.I enjoyed my time in Phoenix, and I sure as hell didn’t want to be rejected for the Boston job, but I’m a Midwesterner at heart.My parents still live in the Indianapolis suburb where I grew up, and finding a job near cows and cornfields might soothe my soul in a way I didn’t know I needed until I spent time in Beaucoeur.
“So, what now?”
The parking lot lights cast a yellow glow over both of us, and while I’m scared to consider how sallow and haggard it likely makes me look, it’s somehow flattering to the man standing just out of arm’s reach.Good bone structure is its own reward, I guess.
But we’re focused on my struggling career.“I’m talking to a couple other agencies and have a great lead in Portland.”
“Maine or Oregon?”
“Oregon.They loved the stop-motion recycling PSA I did with actual scrap metal from a junkyard last year.Plus, a couple of former clients have reached out about freelance work.”I shrug, putting on a brave face.“I’ll find something by the time Brita’s back.”
Because I’m leaving and the real Verdant hostess is coming back and none of this really matters.Not this confusing interlude or the questions I’m now asking about whether Jonesy and I are buddies or something a little more.
“No girl fights over the hostess stand, no matter how much Rob would enjoy it,” he says with a carefree Jonesy smile that tips the balance back toward friend territory.
“No girl fights,” I repeat.Then my stupid mouth opens up and says, “Hey, we’ve both got the next two days off.”Ask me to hang out with you outside of work.
“Two whole days.Can’t wait.”His gaze holds mine for a beat before he blinks away.“See you Wednesday, Livvie-Liv.”
It’s an obvious blow-off, and it stings more than the rejection from the Boston job, which says everything about my messed-up priorities right now.
“See you Wednesday,” I mutter, but he’s already striding to his truck.
On the way back to CJ’s, I’m thinking about how many marshmallows I can cram into the oversized mug of hot chocolate I’m planning to make as soon as I’m changed into sweats and a hoodie.If I can’t have Jonesy and I can’t have Santa Luke and I can’t have my dream job, at least I can have that.
Nine
Jonesy
I’m still pissed at myself and pissed at those idiots in Boston as I pull up to Deke’s place.
“You’re late!”he yells from his ancient Range Rover, so I take my sweet time jumping out of my truck, grabbing my bag, and sauntering over to him.
“Oh sorry, are you in a hurry to get somewhere?”I toss my shit in the back and climb into the passenger seat.He responds by grumbling as he guns it down his driveway so we can zip across town to pick up Ben and Landon.We’re performing a stripped-down—bad joke—version of our holiday show at one of the Chicago clubs tonight, then sticking around for a private show on Monday.We stand to make decent cash as out-of-towners in the area, especially since we’re saving money by crashing with some of the dancers we’ve gotten to know up there thanks to these occasional talent swaps.
But any excitement I felt at the earning potential over the next few days is dead and gone thanks to the hurt expression on Liv’s face when I blew her off.She took me completely by surprise when she hinted at a hangout during our days off, and instead of coming up with literally any semi-plausible excuse for why I couldn’t—working a side catering gig, helping a friend move, visiting my nana in the nursing home, robbing a bank—my brain panicked and started playing“Jingle Bell Rock”on a loop.Running away was the worst possible thing I could’ve done, but it’s exactly what happened.She’ll probably never ask me to hang out again, which is just fucking great.
That fuckup plus the fact that I haven’t figured out a way to tell her about the wholeI’m actually Luke Lawless and had no idea until recently that I should probably tell youthing means my brain’s too busy to let me grab the nap I’d been counting on during the almost three-hour drive.After the show last night and my Verdant shift this morning, I desperately needed one in order to be the best Santa I can be for the good people of Chicago.
I’m still feeling shitty as we’re warming up in the dressing room at Wild Nights Chicago when Landon asks, “You really sticking with the hat and beard all night, brother?”He pulls his right knee up to his chest and twists to limber up his hammy, repeating the motion with the left leg.The kid talks like a perma-stoned landlocked surfer, but he’s actually a physics major at Rayman College.
“Yep.”I squirt another palmful of oil into my hand and smooth it onto my chest.“It’s part of the costume now.”
“Haven’t you heard?”Deke steps in front of the mirror to check his dick placement behind the polar bear nose on his thong.“Jonesy’s got a girl who doesn’t know he dances.”
“No shit?”Ben’s head pops up from the suitcase he’s crouched behind, the bells on his elf vest jingling.
“She’s not my girl,” I say irritably.
“But you don’t want her to find out that you dance.”Deke nods at his reflection and pulls on the white sweats he’ll be stripping off momentarily.
“When’s the last time Luke Lawless gave a shit what a woman thinks about him?”Ben chortles.
