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“Actually,” Landon says, his brow furrowed in thought, “when’s the last time Luke picked a Lady Lawless to entertain after a show?”
“Orduringa show.He really must have a girl.”Ben holds up a hand, and Landon slaps him a high five.
"Jesus Christ, just fuck off about it,” I snap, and all three of them fall into shocked silence.I press my thumb to the spot between my eyebrows where a headache’s starting to form.
“Sorry,” I say in a more normal tone.“I had to blow her off when she asked if I wanted to hang tomorrow, and it killed me that I couldn’t tell her why.”
“Sucks, dude.”Landon pulls me into a bro hug.“Mega sucks.”
“Yeah, man, I’m sure she understands,” Ben adds, slapping my back.
I’m sure she doesn’t, but I appreciate their support.“Thanks, fellas,” I manage.
“You wanna hit this?”Landon holds up his vape, and when I shake my head, he and Ben wander off to discuss their plans for tomorrow’s bachelorette party.
Deke sidles up to me once they’re gone.“Sorry to give you shit.I didn’t know all that.”
“S’okay.I’ll figure out some way to make it up to her.”If she’s willing to talk to me again, that is.“Thing is, we’ve been hanging out at work a lot, and I just found out that she’s a really big fan of Luke.And like, I’ve either got to leave her alone entirely or I’ve got to tell her that’s me.But how am I supposed to do that without making things weird?”
Deke winces.“Tough.But if she takes it bad when you tell her, at least you know she’s not worth the trouble.”
“Yeah.Maybe.”
We fall silent as we watch Ben and Landon drop to the floor in what seems to be a push-up competition.
“Were we ever that young?”
“I don’t think so.”I turn thirty next month, and I’ve never felt older than I do right now as I listen to those two not-quite-legal-to-drink boys hold themselves in plank position as they debate how many bridesmaids they can hook up with tomorrow.There was a time when I might’ve joined them, but not now.Not after the year I’ve had.
As if he’s reading my mind, Deke asks, “How’s your mom doing?”
“She’s good.Her doctor says her new liver’s fully regenerated.”I keep my answer short because the whole subject still makes me overly emotional.
“And Wyatt?”
I clench my jaw so hard it creaks.“Saint Wyatt’s fine.”That answer’s even shorter but for a very different reason.
“You’re doing your part,” Deke says quietly.“And speaking of…”
He gestures toward the stage entrance, and I exhale hard.“Yep.Let’s go make some money.”We walk out together, and I add, “But I’ll leave the bachelorette hookups to you guys.”
My phone starts blowing up on the drive back to Beaucoeur on Tuesday morning.It’s like Deke asking about my brother summoned him from whatever demon dimension he occupies when he’s not making my life hell with his perfection.Of course, he’s desperate to talk to me after I’ve had a particularly exhausting weekend earning money one dollar bill at a time.Since I’m at the wheel while everybody else sleeps it off, I don’t feel even a tiny bit bad blowing off his pissy messages demanding that I call him.
Where I go wrong is not texting him back once I’m at home.But all I want to do is collapse and shut off my brain until my Verdant shift tomorrow morning.Last night’s bachelorette party was even wilder than I expected, and yeah sure, I came home with bundles of cash, but I don’t know if I can keep doing this for much longer.I fucking loved the promise—hell, theexpectation—of easy sex at these private parties during my first couple of years dancing.But recently, I’m barely tolerating it and have gotten good at saying a polite no to the birthday girl who offers a mid-party blowjob or the partygoer begging for a hookup in the next room.I’ll leave the public blowies and anonymous encounters to Ben and Landon and even Deke when he’s in the mood.Christ, maybe it’s time to leave the whole thing to Ben and Landon and Deke.I still love being onstage.It’s the rest of it that’s losing its shine.
Rather than dwell on that depressing thought—because who am I if I’m not the wild and crazy guy who shakes his dick for a living?—I stretch out on the couch with my slow-as-shit laptop to read up on a radio story I caught the tail end of as we swung around Joliet.I locate it within a few clicks and give it a read.
“I’ll be damned,” I murmur when I’m done.Knowing full well that it’s going to please him way too much, I shoot Gabe a text.
dude, did you know we’re in climate zone 6a now?
His reply zips back immediately.
yep, climate change is wild
Of course, he couldn’t leave well enough alone and follows up with,
I’ll consider this your application to HG Landscaping.You’re hired, start date Jan 2
