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“I just… My dad isn’t very good at being a parent. Sometimes I wonder if I didn’t have Theo if he would have given me up.”
“I’m sure that’s not true. Some adults just don’t know how to put someone else’s needs above their own needs. My mum was the same.”
“I can’t even remember my mum.” Millie leaves the words hanging and I read between the lines. For whatever reason, she wants to talk about this with me.
And despite Theo’s warnings ringing in my ear, I can’t find it in myself to change the subject.
“She died, right?” Millie had alluded to it in group therapy.
“She killed herself when I was four.”
“Shit, I’m sorry.”
“Theo was nine. He changed after it happened. He’d probably hate me telling you this, but he wasn’t always this cold, angry boy. He used to be easy-going. He used to smile.”
“Grief does funny things to people.”
“Yeah, I became withdrawn. I couldn’t understand how she could leave us. I still can’t. And sometimes I’m so angry I can’t see straight.”
“You know it’s bullshit when they tell you time will heal you.”
“Yeah, I figured as much.”
“Time doesn’t heal you, it just dulls the pain.”
“Look at us, bonding.” Millie grins up at me. “Theo will love this.”
“Maybe we should keep this between the two of us.”
“You really don’t like my brother, huh?”
“The feeling is mutual.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure about that,” she says.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing.” She shrugs.
“Hmm. It’s almost first bell, you should probably hurry. You don’t want to be late.”
“I’m always late.” Millie grins wider.
“Well, I can’t afford to be late unless I want Miss Linley and Mr. Porter breathing down my neck, so I’ll see you at group tomorrow, okay?”
“Or we could hang out later?”
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Millie.”
It’s one thing to walk to class with her and see her in group but I don’t want to provoke Theo anymore than I already plan to.
Not after last night.
“Because of Theo?” There’s a teasing lilt in her voice.
“Among other reasons.”
“Name them.”
