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“Feel any better?”?
“No, but I don't have the energy to do something stupid, so that's a plus,” he says with a humorless chuckle.?
I stand and hold out my hand to help him up. “Come on, let's get you cleaned up.”?
“You don’t have to take care of me,” he groans, taking my hand anyway.?
“Iwantto take care of you.”God knows someone has to.??
We walk through his kitchen and to the sink, where we wash his hands. Grabbing the first aid kit, I apply an ointment and wrap up his knuckles. Nox is trying his hardest not to look me in the eye. As if my caring for him is making him uncomfortable.?
“Shouldn’t you go check on Colton?”??
“I already did… Besides, I know damn well you’re the one who needs me the most right now.”?
His eyes finally lift to mine. They shine with shame, their yellow flecks practically dancing as he observes my face.?I can’t help but reach out to him. My hand swipes at the hair that’s fallen over his face, my fingers lingering for just a few seconds before I pull away.
“I wanted to kill him,” he admits, and my heart hurts for him.?
“I don’t doubt it. Probably deserves it,” I say nonchalantly.?
“Fuck, you might be more fucked up than I am.” I shrug my shoulders, not denying it, and he huffs a laugh.?
Grabbing two Tylenol and a glass of water, I force him to take it. Thankfully, he doesn’t protest, knowing how sore he’s going to be tomorrow.???
With his hand in mine, I lead Nox upstairs. As we walk past Colton's room, I place my ear on his door. There's no noise coming from the other side, so we continue toward Nox’s bedroom.??
Pulling his comforter back, I motion for him to lie down. He does so in silence. Utter defeat evident on his face.??
When I go to pull the comforter over him, Nox reaches out for my hand, stopping the motion. “Will you stay—I mean, if you want… You don't have to.” He stumbles over his words, and his vulnerability stuns me.?
This poor, beautifully broken boy in front of me is allowing me to see it all. All his fear, shame, pain, all of it. Without a single word, I lie down beside him, laying my head on his chest. His arms wrap around me, and I feel his body release some of its tension. This is the first time we have ever shared such an intimate moment, but it feels like the most natural thing I've ever done.?
Not too long after, I feel his breathing level off, and his body relaxes as sleep overtakes him. Only then do I let my tears fall. I cry for him, for Colton, and Isla. I cry for the scared boy who was forced to grow up too soon. I cry for a family I know no one is coming to save.?
That night is the first night I’ve prayed in what feels like forever. Begging for a light through all of this pain.
Five
October
I’m still fucking pissed with my brother when me and the boys pull up to the party in G’s dad’s Tahoe. I have a bad feeling about tonight. Not sure if I’m feeding off of Greyson’s energy, knowing his ex is going to be here with another guy, or if it has to do with Emerson.?
I hate fighting with my brother, but when it comes to his best friend, I have a short fuse. And sometimes Colton’s choices are piss poor… Like his plan to take Emerson to Highland, the shitty-ass town north of ours. So now I’m on edge, worried about him—worried about her.?
To top it off, Emerson was dressed to kill tonight. A cropped band tee under a black, purple, and blue flannel to match her lavender hair. Jean shorts overtop of fishnet stockings showcased her long, lean legs. Legs I’ve been having a harder and harder time not staring at as she works magic in the octagon at Lights Out. Her piercing brown eyes, naturally rimmed in gold, were surrounded with more makeup than normal, only making them even more captivating to look into.?
“Pong partners?” Ford asks as we walk into the house. Music thumping, hundreds of bodies crowded around, and the smell of spilled beer and sweet kush is in the air.?
I give him a little nod and follow him toward the kitchen island that’s been set up for a beer pong game.?
“We got the winner,” Ford announces as we are greeted by some of his football teammates.?
Brittany, one of the chicks from our school, keeps shooting me looks, not giving a fuck that her boyfriend is within a few feet of us. We fucked a few times over the summer until Ford told me she was his teammate’s girlfriend.?
No skin off my back… Her hair wasn’t colorful enough.?
In no time, Ford and I are running the table. “Since nobody here wants to see either of your hairy asses, we won’t make y’all run around the house naked,” Ford taunts his teammates. We just skunked right as Snow and Lucian walk up calling next.?
