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“That’s not your fault, Gee. You did everything you could.”
“I sure as fuck let you hit rock bottom, I guess. I just didn’t think you’d do it quite the way you did. In the end, I guess I was rock bottom.”
Cee frowned. “I wasn’t the easiest to contain. But the things I do remember from those months are you. You taking care of me. You holding me while I cried. You forcing me to take care of myself.”
“I wasn’t enough.”
“You were exactly enough. I’m here. You saved me. You did everything a best friend would. I can never repay you. And now I find out you’ve been reading to my son every day for a year. When I couldn’t be a parent, you took over and made sure he was safe.”
“Mason was perfectly capable. I just didn’t want to leave it to chance. Before I knew it, that little kid was a part of my day, the same as brushing my damn teeth.”
“You could’ve walked away.” She lowered her gaze to the table. “You should’ve.”
“I’m never walking away, Kate.” My voice choked on the emotions. “I missed you so much. I just wanted to make you better. You were in so much pain and I would’ve done anything to help you.”
She mumbled something that I couldn’t hear. “What?”
Cee raised her eyes to mine. “Losing you was rock bottom. The day I threw you out of my hospital room, I knew that I’d fucked up and needed to get my shit together. You looked like hell. Fuck,” she choked. “Just the look on your face. I didn’t want to keep hurting you, so I let you go.”
I couldn’t take the space between us anymore. I stood and pulled her into my arms, holding her to me as tightly as possible. Her arms wrapped around me just as firm.
I pressed a kiss into her hair. “I don’t know where we go from here, mia dea, but I want to be wherever you are. Not because I promised Eli I would be, but because I’m a selfish bastard who fell in love with his girl.”
Sixty-Six
Cee
I stilled in Sergio’s arms, my breath caught between inhaling and exhaling. He fell in love with me?
“Hey, look at me,” he said, pulling back enough to look me in the eye. “I know you just lost him and I’m not looking to replace him. I know you don’t feel the same way about me. But I can’t let you continue to think that this is just because I promised him I’d look after you. The truth of the matter is, I was jealous as fuck that he got to have you and I missed out.”
I just stared at him as he confessed. The words… I tried to let them sink in.
“Breathe, Kate,” he reminded me. I sucked in a large breath and let it go. He wiped the tears on my cheeks with his thumbs.
“Gee… I don’t know what to say right now.” My mind couldn’t keep up with everything this morning, and it had nothing to do with being woken up at dawn after only a few hours of sleep.
“You don’t have to say anything. I just wanted you to know.” He kissed my forehead, and I melted back into his arms. I could hear his heart pounding in his chest. “But don’t think I didn’t hear you call me your best friend. I’m not letting you take it back, either.” I heard the smile in his voice.
“I think you’ve known that was true for a long time. I just enjoyed keeping your ego in check, drummer boy.”
“No one humbles me like you do.” He ran his hands up and down my spine, and I relaxed further. The lack of sleep was catching up to me now that I was in his arms and knew he was there because he wanted to be.
I yawned. “Sorry, I didn’t really sleep last night.”
“How long is Wyatt with Elle?”
“Not long. I just needed to get you alone to talk. Not exactly the kind of conversation you have with a kid underfoot.”
“Come on.” He pulled me toward the door. “We can grab Wyatt and go home so you can nap.”
“You don’t have to —”
“Cee. I want to,” he interrupted. “So fucking much, I want to.”
“Okay,” I whispered. Butterflies swarmed my belly, and my heart raced.
He said he loved me.
