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I smiled back. It was left of center, but so was I.
“Pandora went after you to destroy me,” she continued. “She will go after me to destroy you. Your plan is excellent. Once you find the book, I will help you decipher it.”
It was embarrassing how close I came to squealing. I might have preened just a little at my mother’s approval… “Thank you. I love you, Man-mom and Sean. Losing you again after I just got you back would be worse than death.”
“We should go now under the cloak of darkness,” Dagon said. “I shall transport the three of you.”
“And I’ll call in back up for protection. They will be there when you arrive,” Abaddon added. He snapped his fingers and produced three glowing cell phones and a laptop. “Use these. They’re undetectable and can’t be traced.”
Sean put the electronics in his man purse and then shook Abaddon’s hand. “Take care of my sister,” he said in the most serious tone I’d ever heard my brother use. “If you screw up or hurt her, you’ll have to answer to me. And, yes… I amfullyaware that you could kill me with a flick of your pinky finger, but I won’t go down without getting a few damned good punches in and a solid knee to the testicles.”
“Sean Bloom is the sexiest man alive,” Fifi bellowed, saluting my brother. “While I imagine him naked often, I would never screw the life force out of him. Sean Bloom makes the world and better place.”
None of us were sure what to do with that, so we did nothing. Sean reluctantly saluted Fifi back with a terrified expression.
Jonny Jones and Stella Stevens stepped forward and bowed.
“It would be an honor to guard your family,” Jonny said. “I believe that my gift of invisibility might be an added layer of protection.”
“And my tits are something no one sees coming,” Stella added with great pride, pointing at her perky girls. “Legendary. I would also be humbled to protect your family.”
“What do your tits do?” Cher asked.
Stella began to remove her shirt.
I stepped in quick. “How about we tell, not show?”
The insane woman giggled. “Good thinking, Bitch Goddess Cecily. It would be unfortunate to riddle the walls of your home with bullet holes.”
“Jesus Hyrum Christ,” Cher cried out. “Your knockers are guns?”
“Machine guns,” Stella said. “They also dance.”
Before she demonstrated the boob dance, I quickly accepted the offer. “My answer is yes. I would be grateful and pleased if you would aid in the safekeeping of my family.”
“But you idiots will miss being on the TV show,” Irma pointed out.
Jonny didn’t miss a beat. It surprised me. “There will be more TV shows. There is only one Lilith, Man-mom and Sean.”
My mouth dropped open. There was way more to Jonny Jones than met the eye.
“I also will be earning brownie points with the Bitch Goddess Cecily and will be superior to all of you. With my good looks, killer smile and six-pack abs, I’ll be a revered Demon. I would surmise it will be easier to get laid.”
Ahh, there was the Jonny I knew.
“What he said,” Stella added.
I wanted to laugh. I didn’t. Their magical gifts were so bizarre they might very well come in handy. However, I wasn’t going to let Jonny be a dick. “There are no brownie points to be had. My eternal gratefulness will have to suffice.”
“I can work with that,” Jonny confirmed. “But I would like everyone to acknowledge that my fuckable potential will increase.”
Like Uncle Joe getting applause for reminding everyone that it was fine for his naked ass to be on my couch since he was dead, Jonny also got applause. I didn’t join in. My people were certifiable.
I extended my hand to Dagon. He shook it with a bemused expression. It wasn’t the norm for a Goddess to shake hands with her people, but there was a new sheriff in town who’d only known of her Demon heritage for only a few short weeks. My human side was showing, and I planned to keep it that way. Shit was going to change. Lilith said to embrace change. That was going to have to go for everyone. “Please transport them.”
He bowed.
Man-mom grabbed me and hugged me tight. My dad was a distracted mess of profound wisdom. He was absent-minded. He was loving, and he gave the best hugs in the world. Sean and I had grown up with unconditional love. It was a true gift. I held on to my dad and rested my head on his strong shoulder. I’d almost lost him. I was pretty sure the enormity of that hadn’t hit me yet. The truth was I didn’t have time to dwell on what happened yesterday. The goal was to focus on the now and make sure Man-mom was safe. It was bound to hit me eventually, but it would have to wait until Pandora was back in her mysterious box.
