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“It’s peaceful out here,” Elic said. “I forgot what it was like to not be surrounded by noise all the time.”
“When we started doing well and booked our first major tour, I asked my parents if I could buy a piece of their property. They wanted to give it to me, but it was important I had a home that was wholly mine that I’d paid for. I’ve had a good life, except for losing my mom.” I turned to see Elic watching me raptly. “She died of cancer when I was young.” I looked around at the house and the land. “I wanted to do this for myself. To prove I could.”
“I’m sorry about your mom and I understand wanting to do this for yourself. Your voice… I had no idea. I knew you were the singer and knew the band was obviously good, but you sing like I’ve never heard before. Like you were singing just for me. When I looked around, I saw I wasn’t the only one feeling that way.”
I shifted in the seat to get more comfortable. “It started as something fun to do, but we quickly realized we were good at it.”
“Casper is your stepbrother. Is he older or younger?”
“A year younger. I’m thirty-six.”
“What about Dash and Slater?”
“Slater is the oldest at thirty-eight. Dash is the same age as me. We went to school together and knew each other before forming the band.”
“Is that why Slater calls Casper son?” Elic smiled. Seeing him happy made me happy in return. It was infectious.
“Slay likes to bust on Cas. Mostly because he can and knows Cas won’t do anything about it, except give him shit back. Cas doesn’t warm up to others easily, but Slater and Dash are different. They put up with his moods, dish it back if need be, and put him in his place when warranted.”
Starry ran to us and dropped a tennis ball near Elic. He stood and bent to pick it up so he could throw it. I watched the way his jeans molded over his ass. I shouldn’t have, yet I couldn’t pry my eyes away.
Mom had to convince him to go shopping with her. My clothes were too big for him to continue wearing. He would only let her buy him so much and said he’d pay her back every dollar.
Elic stood and, of course, he caught me staring. I didn’t look away; didn’t bother to hide how I appreciated the way he looked. He moved to the edge of the patio, watching Starry run across the property with his back to me. “The way you look at me sometimes, it makes me wonder why.”
“You’re beautiful, Elic.”
“I know you don’t want me. Not like you do Casper. That’s okay. I wouldn’t want to be second best to anyone. But when you look at me like you just did… I like your eyes on me, even if it’s only to distract yourself from who you truly want.”
I couldn’t move. What he’d said wasn’t what I was doing. I didn’t confuse Casper and Elic. I didn’t think one was more attractive than the other. They were different in every way and I was attracted to both of them. “Elic…”
“Don’t, Reed,” he whispered, defeat edging his tone.
Getting up, I walked around the vehicle and stood behind him. Elic was a couple of inches shorter than me. I had to resist reaching for him, unsure if he’d want me to or not. “You could never be second best. I look at you because you deserve to be cherished. I’ve noticed you from the moment I saw you walking on the sidewalk. Every minute with you since has drawn me in. You’re a man who’s been through hell and back and is still standing on his feet. Your strength, your perseverance… you amaze me.”
He turned. The low light from inside cast him in a soft glow. It was enough for me to see the tears shining in his eyes. “Don’t say things you don’t mean. I’ve seen you with Casper.”
“You have. It wasn’t intentional for you to find us like that. I love him. It doesn’t matter that he’s my stepbrother or I shouldn’t let him treat me like he does. I see him, the real him, that few do. While he hurts me every time he walks away, he also heals me when we’re together. You see him too, don’t you? You see that he’s more than the asshole exterior who tries to keep others at arm’s length.”
“Reed…”
Reaching up, I lightly traced my fingers over his jaw before stepping back. I shouldn’t caress his skin like that. He’d had men touch him far too many times when he didn’t want them to. I wouldn’t do that. If I touched him, I wanted it to be because he allowed me to.
Elic held my gaze, his eyes narrowing. “I thought you were different.”
“What?” Did I miss something?
“You touched me, then pulled away like I was dirty.”
I gaped, mouth hanging open, in full shock. “No! I don’t think that!”
“Sure,” he scoffed. “You know what I used to do to earn money. How can you not look at me and see the street scum who sucked guys off to survive?”
“Don’t put words in my mouth. I never thought that about you. I told you what I see—a survivor. You did what you had to. I don’t look at you and see someone dirty. Jesus, Elic, how can you think that? We’re talking about seeing deeper than the surface. Is that what you think of me?”
He started shaking his head. “No. It’s just… and you… why did you pull away then?” Frustration bled through his tone as his hands fisted by his sides.
“Because you’ve been through enough. You don’t need me touching you uninvited.”
