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“You’ve made up your mind?” He asks.
I nod.
He looks at me for a long moment, then says, “Although I hate this, I will respect your decision.”
His face turns to stone as he turns around and walks away from me.
While he looks stoic, I know him enough to know that his heart is breaking as he walks away.
I hate to have done that to him, but like I said, this baby comes first. I just hope I haven’t made the wrong decision.
20
TRAVIS
Even though I’ve always wanted children, I’ve never considered myself much of a baby person.
That has all been blown to hell as I sit here, smiling at the newborn cradled in the crook of my elbow.
Mom forced me to come back home for the birth of my baby brother, Phil’s first born. She insisted that I’ve missed way too much of our major family events. I’m ashamed to say she was right, because I have two other nieces and nephews who I only met in person after their second birthdays.
I had convinced myself that video calls to see the babies was good enough, because they wouldn’t know the difference whether I was really there in person or not. However, as I look down at this baby I’m starting to realize the weight of Mom’s reproach. These are the things that are important in life. So I’m going to have to make more time for them.
“Stop that, you’re being creepy,” Phil says.
I look up at him. “What?”
“Why are you grimacing at my daughter? You’re going to scare her.”
“I’m not grimacing. It’s called a smile.”
“Well, whatever it is, stop it.”
“Yeah, it is unsettling,” says my other brother Charlie as he throws another log into the fireplace in the great room of my parent’s mansion, the house where we all grew up. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you smile at a child. Usually you just hiss and run away.”
We all laugh and Mom says, “Now, you boys, stop picking on your brother. I think it’s lovely that he is so smitten with baby Arabella. Perhaps you’re thinking of having one of your own sometime soon?”
Charlie cackles. “The day Travis decides to have a baby is the day hell freezes over. Besides, he’s so old. His jizz is probably dust by now.”
Mom picks up one of Arabella’s stuffed toys from the table next to her and hurls it across the room at Charlie. “Don’t be so crude, and Travis can have a baby whenever he wants.” She turns back to me. “I actually think you would be a wonderful father.”
“I’m not saying he won’t be a good father, I’m just saying he istheeternal bachelor,” Charlie says.
“Well, no one asked you,” Mom snaps.
I neglect to tell them about TJ and my unborn child with Paige on purpose. We are all here to celebrate Phil and his growing family. I don’t want to distract from that.
We all spend the rest of the evening making small talk until Phil takes the baby back to her mother and Charlie leaves to go home to his family. Mom and I are left alone.
“Sweetheart, don’t let what Charlie said affect you.”
I chuckle. “I won’t. It’s been years since I last took anything Charlie said seriously.”
“I just don’t want you to think that it’s too late for you to have kids if you want them.”
I know I had decided not to tell the rest of the family about my kids, but I think I can confide in my mother.
“Mom, I want to tell you something, but you have to promise not to tell anyone for a while.”
