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“Breathe, Noelle, breathe,”Lucero rubbed soothing circles on her back in an attempt to calm her.
“I’m trying,” Noelle whizzed, her hands gripping onto her stomach. “I don’t think we have much longer, Lulu,” she said through pained breaths.
Lucero’s panic mirrored her own as she felt the start of a contraction. She gripped her friend’s hand tightly, trying her best to breathe in and out.
“That phone you mentioned. Do you think you can get it?”
“Noelle…”
“I know it’s dangerous, but I need to call my brother. I’ll swallow my pride. Hell, I’ll do anything as long as he can get me out of here before my son comes,” Noelle gritted her teeth. “He can’t be born here, Lulu. My Mali can’t be born here. Youknowthat.”
“I do,” her friend sighed. “I’ll try to get it. Will you be alright on your own?”
Noelle nodded.
“Go,” she mouthed to Lucero.
As she hurried out of the room, Noelle stood up, wobbling down to the bathroom to take a look at herself. She looked like a nightmare, with dark circles under her eyes and hollows in her cheeks. God, she hadn’t seen a doctor for the entire duration of her pregnancy.
Although she’d tried to look after herself as best as she could, it was nothing compared to the care of a trained physician. She didn’t want to think that there might be something wrong with her baby, but the worry was ever present.
Despite her best efforts to the contrary, stress had been her faithful companion throughout her pregnancy. She couldn’t help but worry about everything around her. About her own safety and that of her baby, about her friend who was always risking so much to help her, and about Raf.
It had been months since she’d last seen or heard from him, and she didn’t even know if he was still alive. The only thing she was sure of was that Sergio had not killed him—if he had, he would have gloated by now. But that didn’t discount the countless other dangers he would have faced as he escaped. He was, after all, in a foreign country, and in poor physical condition.
Had he made it back home safely? Was he healthy?
Did he… remember her?
“If only he could be here,” she whispered, pressing her hand over her baby bump. “Heshouldhave been here to see your birth,” she continued as tears coursed down her cheeks.
For a moment—just a moment—she dared dream how this would have looked in an alternate reality.
Raf would be by her side, holding her in his arms as she went through the pains of labor. He would whisper comforting words into her ear, allaying all her fears and making her feel safe. Most importantly, he would be present to witness the moment his son came into the world.
“I’m sorry,” she murmured, swallowing hard against the wave of anguish that overtook her. So many months alone with her thoughts and she could finally recognize just how wrong she’d been. This was all her fault. She had been the one to bring this all upon herself. If only she’d had more restraint… If only she hadn’t gone to him that night.
Yet to regret that was to regret the most beautiful moments she’d ever experienced in her life. To rue that was to regret the conception of her baby—of Mali. And how could she do that?
Not for the first time, she found herself at a crossroads, not knowing which feeling she should focus on. She was happy that she was going to become a mother—she was ecstatic that she was carrying Raf’s child, for she loved him as much as she loved his father.
But she also blamed herself for the circumstances in which she found herself. Yes, she wanted to have this baby. But God, if only she could have had him at a different time, when she wasn’t the prisoner of a sadistic and demented man.
She loved her baby, but she hated herself. Because of her actions, she couldn’t ensure Mali’s safety, let alone her own. And if something were to happen to her baby… If Sergio dared to do anything to him.
Pure terror gripped her tightly, her throat closing up as she struggled for air.
“Not my baby. Please, God…”
She’d never been overly religious, but in that moment, she was willing to do anything—try anything—as long as she could ensure the safety of her unborn baby.
This state of pure anxiety had plagued her for the entire duration of her pregnancy, as she’d feared an attack at any point. Knowing Sergio and his wounded ego, she was certain he would retaliate at some point, striking her when she was at her lowest. And now… That moment was fast approaching.
Noelle knew that she would be at her most vulnerable when the labor pains would set in, even more so after the birth. For that reason, she needed to act fast. Although she was aware she’d sent Lucero on a suicide mission to get a phone, it was the only way out.
It was at that moment that Mali decided to move, and she nearly doubled over from the strength of the kick.
She closed her eyes, inhaling deeply as she sank to the floor.
