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Rina nodded. Her knees were jelly.
“You have to let me drive,” Steve said, taking the keys from her hand.
“Control freak,” Rina teased, punching his arm lightly.
“I should say the same to you.”
ChapterSeventeen
Sunlight spilled through the bedroom window, illuminating the sheets that wrapped around Rina and Steve’s ankles. Steve was still fast asleep, his broad chest filled with coarse chest hair rising and falling, his lips parted, and Rina propped herself up on her elbow and gazed at his profile in disbelief. For months, all she’d ached for, all she’d imagined was this— being with him in this very real yet simple way. But the beauty of it was staggering. Tears sprung to her eyes.
Rina tip-toed to the kitchen and brewed a pot of coffee. Standing in her sleeping shorts and a tank top, she listened to the bubble of the coffee pot and watched three sparrows’ flit through her backyard. Several of her plants looked more vibrant than ever, the green of their leaves thickening.
In the wake of her father’s big reveal about Penny, Rina had been a walking, talking mess. She’d ordered tequila shots like a frat boy on spring break; she’d driven like a maniac. And then, she’d thrown herself at Steve, beneath that ancient tapestry of stars over California. All this recklessness wasn’t like her.
There was no telling what would happen when Steve woke up. She tried to imagine him ambling down the hallway, palming his neck. She could practically hear him, telling her that it had all been a mistake. That, or worse. Maybe he’d tell her he just wanted to distract her. Maybe he’d tell her it had been for her own good, but it was never happening again.
Rina checked her phone, hoping for a distraction. Instead, she found a text message from her father.
WALLY: Hated to see you run out like that last night.
And after that, was a phone number. Rina’s heart thudded. She knew it was Penny’s.
But why had her father sent it? Rina racked her brain to understand this man; this horrible, selfish man. Images from long ago splintered her mind. There was her father on his sailboat, a cigar between his teeth, yelling at Rina to “tie the rope the way he’d taught her.” Rina, crying, not sure what he meant. Penny with her hands over her ears, begging everyone to stop yelling. Her mother, drinking a cocktail and watching the waves as though nothing was wrong.
Rina didn’t have the heart to call Penny on the phone. There was something so impersonal about it. That, and it was so easy to just hang up when things got uncomfortable. She imagined Penny’s voice, yet aged up thirty years, and it sent a shiver down her spine.
Rina found her laptop in the next room and used one of her “semi-illegal” services to run Penny’s cell phone number and find the associated address. Just as her father said, Penny was about an hour and a half up the coast, on the outskirts of Santa Barbara. If Rina wanted to, she could get in her car right now, drive up, and accost Penny over her morning coffee.
The hallway floorboards creaked, and Rina jumped up as Steve entered the living room, rubbing sleep from his eye. His smile was tender, nervous. Rina’s heart flipped over. Silence filled the room like water gushing into an empty tank.
And then, Steve cleared the distance between them and kissed her on the lips. Rina’s skin sizzled with electricity. When he pulled back, he gazed into her eyes and touched her cheek. He was doing everything you were meant to do when you were in love, Rina thought. But could she trust it?
“I made coffee,” Rina said.
“Thank you.” Steve retreated into the kitchen to pour himself a mug. He then sat on the couch directly next to Rina. He looked entranced with her. Rina placed her computer on the coffee table and clutched her mug with both hands. The awkwardness in her limbs made her feel like a teenager, unsure of her body.
Suddenly, Rina knew there was only one thing to say. One thing to seal what had happened between them.
“I’m in love with you, you know.”
Steve’s cheeks were blotchy and pink. “And I’m in love with you.”
Rina’s lips quivered into a smile. He’d come out West for her. He’d pushed through his grief for her. He wanted her in his life—for good.
“I would love to stay inside with you all day long,” Rina whispered.
Steve shook his head ever so slightly. “But we can’t.”
“I can’t,” Rina agreed as her shoulders sagged. “I need to go see her.”
More than that, she needed to understand. There was so much she couldn’t wrap her mind around right now.
“But after that,” Rina added, “after I rip the Band-Aid off this thirty-year-old wound, we’re going back out East. Your sister needs us.”
Steve set his jaw and reached for Rina’s hand. “You’re amazing. You know that?”
Rina showered and changed into a pair of loose jeans and a white T-shirt, added a touch of lipstick, and then removed the lipstick immediately, smearing the back of her hand across her lips. She could imagine Penny saying, “Why are you trying so hard? It’s just me.”
