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By the time Addy got home from school, I couldn’t think straight. “Your father’s here to see you this weekend.”
She frowned. “He’s in Maryland?”
“That’s what he said.”
“He never takes me on weekends.”
“He wants to see you. Are you okay going with him?” If she wasn’t, then I’d have to figure something out.
“I want to see him,” she said carefully, and I knew what she wasn’t saying. She didn’t want to be hurt or disappointed.
We packed her a bag, and when his car pulled up to the curb on time, I let out a sigh. Waiting for someone who was a no-show was the most painful thing for a child. As he greeted her and helped her into the car, I wondered what I had ever seen in him.
“Where are you staying?” I asked him.
He didn’t bother to look at me. “With my parents.”
“That’s good.” I liked his parents, even if they weren’t that involved. I knew Addy would be safe with them.
“I’ll bring her by on Sunday,” he said stiffly.
“I’ll call at bedtime.”
Gary nodded.
I hugged and kissed Addy, my heart breaking as Gary drove her away. I had the whole weekend spread out before me without my daughter, and nothing but my anxiety to take over. What if Gary moved to Maryland? What if he wanted to see Addy more often?
I was worried about things changing, but it was good for Addy to have a relationship with her father. I just hoped this wasn’t a fluke, and he’d disappoint her again.
I wished I could call Knox, but he had enough going on. He didn’t need me distracting him. I wanted to be there for him, but he obviously didn’t want me to be involved. It hurt and made me think that our relationship wasn’t as strong as I thought it was.
I sent another text, telling him that Addy was with Gary, and I was free to be there for him. He didn’t respond that night. I would have thought he would have asked if I was okay.
I had trouble sleeping that night. I was worried about Addy and Knox. My head was a mess. By the time I got out of bed, I felt like I’d gone a few rounds in a boxing ring. My muscles hurt, my eyes burned, and a headache was forming at the base of my skull.
It wasn’t going to be a good day. I brewed coffee and wrapped Christmas presents. It was the perfect opportunity with Addy at her father’s. Usually, I had to stay up after she went to bed, wrapping a few each night until they were done.
I tried to get excited about the holiday, but I couldn’t. Everything seemed dimmer with Knox not here. He’d pulled away, and I had a feeling it wasn’t temporary.
I finished the presents by the afternoon, then hid them in garbage bags in the unfinished area of the basement. Addy never went down there.
Then I made myself a sandwich. I felt pathetic, but I wasn’t sure what else I could do.
When I cleaned up the kitchen, there was a knock on my door, which startled me.
I pulled open the door, my stomach twisting. “Knox? What are you doing here?”
“Mom’s on her way home. I thought I’d stop by.” His jaw was tight.
“Come in, then.” It didn’t sound like he intended to stay for long. I didn’t have a good feeling about this visit.
He stood in the kitchen with his jacket still on and his hands stuffed in his pockets.
“How is your mom?” I asked.
“She’s okay. They don’t think it was a heart attack. Her heart looks good.” His voice was clipped.
I let out a sigh of relief. “That’s great news.”
