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Then she darts up from the chair, charging over to Maddox and screaming, “You think you’re so special because you have a big dick, but youarea big dick.”
I’ve never been fitted for a toilet paper dress before. Another thing to check off the old bucket list.
It’s Friday, and I’m over at Sophie’s house getting measured for tomorrow’s toilet paper gown event. Eva, our other best friend, is doing it because Sophie is having a hard time getting off the couch with her swollen ankles.
Eva flings back her enviable black silky hair and wraps the tape around my waist, saying, “How are you doing? After that interview?”
I fling up a palm. “Please don’t make me talk about it. Smith wants us to do another one because it got more viewers than any in the network’s history. I’m so, so,sonot doing that again.”
“Oh, man.” Eva whistles. “And Maddox?”
“He’s unemotional about the whole thing, as always. I think he’s a press junkie who secretly loves the drama and ratings.” I roll my eyes. “And, come on. Now, the world knows he’s got a huge dick.”
“Yes, we do.” Eva claps.
“My ears!” Sophie puts her hands over them. “I know I’ve only known Maddox for over a year, but that’s my half-brother you’re talking about. Eww!”
“Shush, Sophie. You’re just gonna have to deal.” Eva folds her arms. “I need this. Especially because of my epic dry spell, which is never ending. I might as well close up shop.”
Sophie groans. “Yeah, I’m ready to do that, too, but for entirely different reasons.”
We all bust up, and this is just what I needed. I look at Sophie, waggling a brow. “Let’s just say I know why he has alongstring of D-listers.”
“Ha!” Eva flops on the couch. “Um, he has them because he’s a rich and famous movie star.”
“Fair point. But now we know thebigreason, if you know what I mean.”
“Okay! I’m in a delicate state. You have to stop.” Sophie gags before taking a gulp of tea.
“I’ve never seen anything like it,” I whisper to Eva, holding my hands about nine inches apart.
“No way. No freaking way!” Eva waves her hands in front of her face.
Sophie inhales sharply. “Wow. Not to switch topics, but yeah—let’s do that. So, Riley, did your grandma’s estate finally get settled?”
“No, but the reading of her will is on Monday.” It’s been held up in probate. I expect a wave of sadness to hit, like it has since the day she passed, but it doesn’t. Instead, I just feel nostalgic. That’s a step, right? “It’s been tough without her, and I’ve missed you both. I know we’ve gotten too busy, but we need to get together more.”
“No kidding!” Sophie pipes in, rubbing her tummy. “We have to soak in all the girl time we can before this thing pops.”
I tilt my head. “Did you find out if it was a boy or a girl?”
Sophie’s upper lip curls. “We, or should I say Lucas, decided not to find out. He wants to besurprised.“ She says the word like it’s the worm at the bottom of a tequila shot.
My face puzzles. “That doesn’t sound like Lucas. Mr. Risk-Averse Planner.”
“I know, right? I guess this is a sign of him trying new things?” Sophie shrugs. “But if he was going to grow less risk-averse, couldn’t he have done it with something like a scuba diving trip in the Caymans? Or anything that’s actually fun?”
“Seriously.” Eva scribbles my measurements down on a notepad and raises a perfectly manicured brow. “Okay, Riley. You’ve stalled long enough. Dish on Maddox. What the heck is happening there?”
My eyes automatically roll. “Well, Sophie, because of your mom—“
“If I had a nickel for every time someone started a story that way…” Sophie cuts in.
“Exactly.” I nod. “So, as you and everyone know, Maddox and I got caught by the paparazzi naked at a nude beach, and the world created Rilox. Our director says now we’re stuck.”
“I cannot believe my mom was on a naked beach with my dad.” Sophie closes her eyes and flips up a palm. “Tell me why, Riles.Why?“ She waggles her head. “Wait, don’t. Yes, do. Ugh, I don’t know—I’m trying to decide if my curiosity trumps my sensitive gag reflex.”
“They were harnessing the power of their crystals.” My tone is upbeat.
